Consistent and resilient trust in the Lord.

There is nothing like the holidays or the end of the year that have you thinking about where you are in life and where you want to be. 💜

I was pondering during the sacrament today about the sacrament prayers. I made a list of the promises and covenants that I made at baptism, and that God made, and there's not as many as I thought there were! I promised to:

1. Be willing to take the name of His Son, Jesus Christ, upon me.
2. Always remember Him.
3. Keep His commandments.

And if I do these, then God promises that:

1. I can always have the Spirit to be with me.

This is such a great promise. I love that as I do those three things, I have the ability to have the Spirit with me–always.

Today was my ward's fast and testimony meeting (since last week was our Stake Conference), and someone said something today that really rang true with me. They said that, just like type 2 diabetes (in which your body still produces insulin but is unable to use it effectively), sometimes when we don't receive or hear guidance from the Spirit, it's a receptor problem. The Spirit is still speaking to us, we are just unable to hear it. 

This really made me think, because I've been struggling within the last couple of years to consistently hear and feel the Spirit, and I always thought something was wrong with me. I've been doing everything right. I've gone to the temple, I've prayed, I've studied my scriptures, I've gone to church...everything you can do, I did. But a friend reminded me that I have depression and anxiety, and this can make it difficult for me to hear or feel the Spirit. This comment that was made in sacrament meeting reminded me of this, and reminded me that sometimes I don't have any control over it, but that there are things that I can do to help increase my reception of the Spirit.

In Relief Society, we talked about the talk "Consistent and Resilient Trust" by Elder L. Todd Budge from the October 2019 conference. We talked about how we can still be happy and find happiness, even when there is sorrow and life is rough. We also talked about how our sorrow and pain can change to joy/gladness because of our Savior. 

"Afflictions and sorrow prepare us to experience joy IF we will trust in the Lord and His plan for us." Sorrow can help lead to growth, learning, and happiness if we trust in the Lord's plan for us. 

We can still have consistent trust in the Lord, no matter the circumstances. And we can still have moments of happiness, even when we are in times of sorrow. Because happiness is PEACE and JOY that comes from surrendering ourselves to God and putting our trust in Him in all things. So as we trust Him, we can be happy and have happiness. :)

I hope everyone has a great week! I have an orchestra concert tomorrow that I am super excited for! And it's just going to be a great week overall! I'm going to make it so that it is a phenomenal week! 

Xoxo

Mattie

Fear leads to doubt, faith leads to trust.

One thing that I have been thinking about a lot this week is fear and faith. Faith and fear cannot exist at the same time. Fear is such an overpowering emotion that it leaves no room for any other emotions. Faith is such an uplifting and empowering emotion that it lifts you up beyond any other emotions you would feel.

Elder Uchtdorf has said about fear, "It is true that fear can have a powerful influence over our actions and behavior. But that influence tends to be temporary and shallow. Fear rarely has the power to change our hearts, and it will never transform us into people who love what is right and who want to obey Heavenly Father."

In that same talk, Elder Uchtdorf also gives us insight into how God motivates us to follow Him. He said, "He sent His Son! God sent His Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to show us the right way. God motivates through persuasion, long-suffering, gentleness, meekness, and love unfeigned. God is on our side. He loves us, and when we stumble, He wants us to rise up, try again, and become stronger. He is our mentor. He is our great and cherished hope. He desires to stimulate us with faith. He trusts us to learn from our missteps and make correct choices."

I love these quotes from Elder Uchtdorf because it's a wonderful reminder that Heavenly Father LOVES US and wants us to be happy, and He wants us to learn and grow. As we have faith in Him, and follow Him, we can get up and try again each time we fall. We can change and improve as we take the time to focus on the things He wants for us.

Sometimes, we just need to take a leap of faith. We just need to do it.

One time I was struggling to focus and my roommate Sabrina showed me this video.
Even though I'd already seen it before it made me smile.
Now, every time I am struggling, I think of this video and Sabrina, and I know that
I CAN DO IT.

God will bless us as we take the time to pray, and make a decision. He will guide and direct us if we are not going in the direction that He knows we need to be going in. But we must choose. 

In a talk by Sister Virginia H. Pearce from 1992, she says, "Why is fear part of earth life? Perhaps our Heavenly Father's greatest hope is that through our fears we may choose to turn to Him. The uncertainties of earth life can help to remind each of us that we are dependent on Him. But that reminder is not automatic. It involves our agency. We must choose to take our fears to Him, choose to trust Him, and choose to allow Him to direct us. We must make these choices when what we feel most inclined to do is to rely more and more on our own frantic and often distorted thinking." 

Elder Gerrit W. Gong said last October, "Our Savior knows our circumstances. As we exercise God-given agency and engage all our faculties in humility and faith, our Savior, Jesus Christ, can help us meet life's challenges and joys. Faith includes a desire and choice to believe. Faith also comes from obeying God's commandments, given to bless us, as we follow His covenant path."

I love these two quotes! In order for us to learn and grow, we must make choices. As we choose to turn to our Father in Heaven and our Savior, we are learning and growing. As we make more and more decisions to trust Them, we become less afraid and more faithful.

I know that it is often really hard to trust God, especially when something you want seems to be out of the picture or His radar, but I promise that as you trust Him, the path that you are currently on seems clear, and the path that you are hoping to take in the future doesn't seem so impossible.

I love my Heavenly Father and I am so thankful for the example of my Savior. I know that They love me so much and are rooting for me, and I am so thankful for Their support in my life, as well as the people in my life that They help place in my path.

Life is hard, but you have to remember to reach up for your Lifeguard's hand because He walks on water and will not let you drown. 

Xoxo

Mattie

"Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you."

Today was ward conference! It went by sooo fast!! It was a really great day!

My thoughts during the sacrament today were more of a reminder to me but I know that I'm not the only one who needs to hear them:

Hoping and wishing (and praying) for things in our life that we want or need is something that everyone does. But we forget to leave it to the Lord, or to do our part, and we get frustrated when things don't go the way that we wanted them to do. Sometimes it doesn't happen at all, and sometimes it doesn't happen for awhile. Either way, the Lord knows what He's doing. Sometimes you just have to let go and trust Him. He'll take care of it. 

We got to hear from Bishop Anderson in sacrament meeting today and I loved everything about his talk:
-All things change when we anchor on a future reward.
3 things that will help (us anchor on that future reward):
1) Diligence
-Anything that is good and righteous takes effort
-Don't stay down. Get back up.
2) Having the Spirit with you
-It's not how the sacrament is passed, but why it is passed.
3) Nourish your soul
-Don't worry about opposition/resistance. It will come.
-Scripture study, prayer, attending church, etc. is how you get spiritual nourishment.

President Acerson also spoke:
The theme of conference today was Doctrine and Covenants 88:63-64
-There are blessings that will come–maybe not in this life, but they will come and all will be made right.
-We understand doctrine through the Spirit.
"Draw near unto me and I will draw near unto you"

The last two hours were absolutely fabulous! The stake Relief Society president, Sister Radmall, spoke and she's great! I love her!
First she mentioned three things she told her kids when they were looking for a spouse and I thought they were great:
1) They need to have a testimony and be committed.
2) Find someone who can make you laugh.
3) Someone you're somewhat attracted to.
Then we watched this video and talked about the three things that cause us to resist receiving blessings. They were Fear, Doubt, and Sin. The way to overcome these can be found in Doctrine and Covenants 88:63-43. :)
*Seek~through the scriptures
–Ask~in prayer
**Knock~through obedience
*Scriptures are little packets of light.
*They have potent power to heal and help.
–The moment you say "Father in Heaven", He hears you.
–Heavenly Father can helps us in things both large and small.
–Prayer can result in miracles.
**Obedience leads to tender mercies.

President Radmall also spoke:
-In life, we often want an alternate ending that we decide.
He decided to focus on one specific line of the conference theme scripture:
"That is expedient for you"
In order to come accept the Lord's answers to our prayers, especially when it is a non-answer or an answer we don't like, we should do a couple things:
-Express gratitude for all things.
-Ask the Lord "what lack I yet? Is there something I've forgotten that needs correcting?"

President Moon:
He focused on the line:
"Seek me diligently and ye shall find me"
-Start with why.
-It (the Gospel) is true, because He lives.
-There is a plan specifically for you.

One last thing President Acerson said was, "Heed promptings and allow the Lord to lead and guide you."

It's been a good day. I soaked up and learned so much today. The three hours flew by so fast, I didn't even think it was three hours. Around 12:30 I was like, "It's 12:30?? There's half an hour left? No way!" I was really surprised. It was a good meeting and I was sad that it was over. I'm grateful for the opportunity I had to hear from our stake leaders and hear messages that the Lord wanted me to hear. I heard some things that might be answers to my prayers but I'm not quite sure so I have to do some more looking. But that's okay, it'll be fine. Turn to Him, and walk to Him, and He will walk to you in return. :)

I'm grateful that I go to school at BYU; it's been such a blessing in my life. I love my ward, and my roommates, and my professors. I am so blessed to be where I am, physically and also in my life. I love my Savior and am so grateful that I can turn to Him, especially this semester as it's been tough in many ways. I'm grateful for my Heavenly Parents and for Their love and support. I am grateful for the heavenly help that I have been given in my life. Some things have been beyond my power but I've had help beyond the veil and I'm so thankful for that. I hope that everyone has a great week this week, and I hope that you know that you're loved and wanted and you're absolutely vital to this earth; you have so much to give to the world.

Xoxo
Mattie

He trusts you, and He loves you.

I've been thinking about this for a little while, but I really thought about it a lot today during the sacrament. Sometimes the Lord just trusts us to do the right thing. He knows we can do it, and He knows we know the right decision. Sometimes He just lets us drive, but He'll take the wheel when needed.

Today in sacrament meeting, the topic was personal conversion. There are a few steps to personal conversion:
1. We have to want it.
2. We have to become humble, and get rid of our pride.
3. We have to study the Gospel–quality study, not quantity study.
4. We need to pray. About everything, but especially to have the Spirit in our lives.
5. We need to sacrifice. We need to fix our sins (as best we can; we're not perfect) and make good habits.

Conversion is becoming someone of the Gospel, and acting on your testimony.

You can't know the goodness unless you experience it or practice it.

It's called personal conversion. You have to do it for yourself. No one else can do it for you.

A testimony is personal knowledge of spiritual truth, while personal conversion is applying the knowledge of the Gospel.

You have to be persistent and patient, because it won't happen all at once.


I know that personal conversion is a lifelong journey, and I know that, with the Lord's help, you can become converted. I know that God trusts us enough to let us take the reigns because sometimes we can only learn what we need to learn if we make the decision by ourselves. He trusts us more than we trust ourselves. I know that He trusts you and He loves you. I also know that He will be there to catch us if we fall; He won't let us fall. He is always there to help us because He loves us so much. He also sends us people when we need them or their influence in our lives. Jesus Christ won't ever leave us alone because He knows our pains and sorrows and afflictions, and He knows how it feels to be alone, and He won't let us be alone. He won't leave you alone. He won't let you be alone.
I can't stress that enough: He won't let you be alone.

He loves you so much. Don't forget that. <3 <3

We need to do our part.

God can't help you if you don't act. Faith is an action—trusting in God is an action. It's so important for us to trust in Him, but we also have to realize that we need to do our part. We can't just pray and say, "I need help getting this thing done," and then sit there and do nothing. We have to do our part and work and He will help us get through it or get it done. But we have to do our part. He will help us as long as we do our part. You have to trust in Him and do your part; His help and aid will come. I know I've been saying "do our part" and variations thereof a lot, but it's what we need to do. The Lord expects us to pull our own weight as far as we can and He will help the rest of the way.

This is kind of random, but it also kind of fits a little. As a wise friend of mine recently said (and I'm paraphrasing here; she said it way better), sometimes you have to give some good things up for better things. 

Finding strength in the storm.

You know when it gets windy and almost rainy and you are told to clean up toys and stuff outside so they don't get wet? I've always been afraid that things will fly away or get blown away when the wind picks up; I don't know why. So I always picked up stuff or put it inside or whatever needed to be done. And I think that life is sometimes like that. We're afraid that some things—testimonies or friendships—will "fly" or "get blown" away and so we try to cling onto them and protect them as much as possible. And yes, sometimes that's the answer to what we can/need to do. But really we just need to strengthen the bonds. We need to strengthen our testimonies so that when the winds of the adversary blow our way, we don't need to be worried. We can pack it up and protect it, but it has been strengthened and we don't need to worry. We need to strengthen our friendships so that when it is questioned, we can say that "yes, we are friends, and no, I will not leave them behind." In order to strengthen our testimonies, we need to put our trust in the Savior. We need to come closer to Him and we need to rely on Him. He will help when the storm blows our way. In a way, this will help us strengthen our friendships, too. Becoming closer to and more like Christ can give us the confidence that we may need to better the bonds of friendship that may be weakening. By Him and through Him, all things are possible. So when life gets stormy, you can find strength in Christ.