He answers privately.

Happy November! Can you believe it is November already?? How time flies! Ricky and I have been married now for just over five months and I can't even believe we are going to have been married for six months later this month! I was just thinking earlier today about how next month, it will be one year from the day that Ricky proposed! I can't even believe it. Time is flying by, and yet, it is going by so slowly at the same time.

I am grateful for the beautiful and wondrous world that we live in. I am grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord, and for His hand in my life. I am grateful for the blessings of the priesthood, and for the miracles that they can bring into our lives.

This week was one of the weirdest weeks, I think, for many personal reasons. But it was also one that reminded me of how blessed I am. I have had several headaches this week, and it hasn't been pleasant. But I am grateful for my husband, who has been my rock this week. He has given me a blessing, helped me with dinners, dressed up with me for Halloween, and has let me take my afternoons and evenings to work on my crafting projects as needed/wanted. He has let me rest when I needed it, and has cuddled with me when I needed it. I couldn't have asked for a better partner. He is always wanting to make sure that I am taken care of, and I am so grateful for his love and concern.

I have been watching The Chosen recently–a TV show based on the life of Jesus Christ. It is an amazing show and I highly recommend it. Today, I watched an episode that reminded me just how much our Savior loves and cares for each of us. One of Jesus' apostles, Simon, is married, and his wife's mother (his mother-in-law) has been sick, and came to stay with them. However, Simon is now a follower of Jesus, and has been traveling with Him. Simon is very worried about his wife and his mother-in-law, and how they will fare while he is out traveling with Jesus. Jesus takes time from their journey to visit Simon's wife, and address her concerns. He also takes time to heal her mother, so that Simon doesn't have to worry about them while he is out on the road. 

This episode made me emotional, as it was a reminder to me that Jesus knows our situation; He knows what we need. In life, we need to go through trials, and sometimes we might feel lost, alone, or afraid. Our Heavenly Father and Savior know what we are going through, and They know what we need. While we may not always have our trials and problems solved or erased, He blesses us and gives us peace and comfort in our trials. While our trials might not always be seen by others, they are very real to us, and I am so grateful for a loving Father in Heaven who knows exactly how I feel, and who knows how to comfort me. I am so grateful that He answers ME. He can and does speak to ME. I am grateful for this knowledge and for the connection that I feel to Him. 

I am grateful for my sweet, loving, sensitive husband, who only wants me to be happy. I love his kind and caring heart, and I love that he is always willing to serve me, and to make sure that I am happy and comfortable.

I am grateful for a compassionate and empathetic Savior, who knows exactly how I am feeling, and who knows what I need. I am grateful that He listens to my prayers, and that He not only knows how to comfort me, but sends His Spirit, as well as any angels (on this side of the veil or the other) to help bring me solace. I love this beautiful version of two of my favorite hymns, Where Can I Turn for Peace? and Be Still, My Soul. Calee Reed is one of my favorite Christian artists, and her music always brings the Spirit in such beautiful ways. I hope that this song touches you and brings you any needed peace, comfort, and love.

I hope you have a wonderful week! God is so good.

Xoxo

Mattie

"My kindness shall not depart from thee."

Oftentimes a lot of thinking goes into what I'm going to post. Sometimes I don't know exactly what I want to say or focus on. Today was one of those days.

I was thinking all day about what to post–and today I've been up since 7. I turned on my church/inspirational playlist on my iPod this morning, hoping that something would stand out, because usually it does. Nothing was standing out to me. Disheartened, I headed off to the singles ward with my sister this morning. What followed was perhaps the best answer to unspoken prayers and pleas that I've ever received.

Today is Fast Sunday, so everyone was given the opportunity after the sacrament to bear their testimonies. The Bishop was the first one to give his testimony, and I am so grateful for his testimony! He mentioned a couple of things that I specifically needed to hear, and he talked a lot about hope. One of the things that he mentioned that I loved was that we don't need confirmation for all of the decisions in our life. He then followed with the thought that Heavenly Father will let us know when we're off the path–not necessarily because of sin, but maybe we took a wrong turn–and He will direct us back. I had kind of already known that, but the way he said it and then followed it was so profound to me. 

In another testimony, someone said that Heavenly Father answers our prayers, even when we think He's not listening. And then they said that He wants us to be happy–truly happy–and we can't do it on our own. And they were right–we can't do it on our own. 

One of the last people to give their testimony said He is aware of us and wants us to succeed, and He sets us free from the things that hold us back. And He does–He puts people in our lives to help us, and He removes those people that we don't need in our life anymore, as well as many other things, to help us succeed.

Pretty much every single person (hahaha that was an accident, I swear) that bore their testimony talked about God's love for us, which I felt was for me.

In Relief Society, the trend continued, and one of the first things that the teacher said was that Heavenly Father's love for us is perfect. It's hard for us to imagine, seeing as how we live in an imperfect world, but His love for us is perfect. His purpose is to help us return to Him (Moses 1:39). Sometimes, someone said, He lets us struggle. But He's always there to help us. 

Sort of going off of that, one of the sisters said that she, too, (though to her it wasn't an "as well" moment) had noticed the message of God's love and that she had needed it. 

And that made me think: I've always known that we all have struggles, but usually they're all different struggles at the same time–one person may struggle with feeling the Spirit, or with doing visiting teaching or whatever–and I've never really had people with the same struggles mention it, at least. Never has it ever been so real to me that we all struggle. And sometimes we all struggle with the same things. 

She also said something about her niece and brother and then related that to our Heavenly Father that I definitely needed: her niece has muscle problems, and she said that she was watching her brother and niece, and they were both on their tummies, and he was facing his daughter, his face right in her face. She said her niece hates tummy time, so she was trying to push up. Her brother said (paraphrasing), "I know, baby, I know it's so hard right now, but it's good for you, and someday you'll have it down and it'll be so easy, I promise." And she then said that Heavenly Father is right there with us, watching us, helping us. He knows it's hard, and that we're struggling, but He also knows that we can do it. We can do it, and He is right there to help us when we need it. 

While I was writing this up, my playlist was playing in the background, and this song stood out to me. This song is sung from our Heavenly Father to us. He's saying that He will be there for us! He loves us and He will be with us. His kindness will never leave us because He will never leave us. One of the lines in the song is "How long can rolling waters remain impure?" and that stood out to me because during sacrament meeting, someone bore their testimony about that and said that they can't; we are given trials and struggles to help refine us. Then she said that Christ walks on those rolling waters, so fear not. I also want to throw in this line of the song that is my absolute favorite: "So hold on thy way, for I shall be with thee. And mine angels shall encircle thee. Doubt not what thou knowest, fear not man, for he cannot hurt thee." The bolded phrase is my favorite because it reminds me of President Uchtdorf's famous quote, "Doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith."

I was blessed today in many ways that were unexpected but needed, and I am so grateful for those that were willing to share their thoughts today. 

God loves us so much! He loves me, and He also loves you. He is always there for us when we need help, strength, and guidance. He sends us people and experiences that we need when we need them, or before we need them, and often also during the time that we need them. He lets us walk our path on our own, but when we are going the wrong way, He will guide us back. He will never let us walk alone, and He will never leave us alone. 

You are loved, you are wanted, you are needed, and you are here for a reason. Find that reason! Find your passion, and go after it. You have something to give to this world that no one else can give. God will help you find your reason, and He will help you to be able to give what you can give. <3

Charity.

So, today sacrament meeting was bittersweet because we received a new bishopric. I'm excited to get to know the new bishopric, but I'm going to miss the old one; I didn't fully cry, but I did get teary-eyed.

Today in Sunday School and Young Women's we learned about how to be more Christlike. I was like, "Ding, ding ding! This is what my blog is about." We read from one or two of President Uchtdorf's talks; we read the one where he says, "This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following: Stop it! It's that simple. We simply have to stop judging others and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love for God and His children." And I love this! Yes, it is sometimes difficult, but I have been getting better at it! I look at or think of people I admire and love and I think, "They're a child of God. He loves them like He loves me. They chose to come to earth; they chose His plan, too," and it makes me happy. We also talked about charity, and service, and how, if we serve people more, we can learn to love them. It's hard not to love someone once you've served them and helped them. Charity is the pure love of Christ, and as we serve people, we come to be more like Christ, we grow closer to Him, and we come to understand those that we serve better.