Peace and love amidst confusion.

I missed last week's post because it was just such a crazy day/week! I've had a lot going on. So I'm playing a little catch-up with a few posts in one. 

March 1, 2020:

Palmyra, New York. 1820. Early spring. Early morning. A young boy. A serious question. A vision from God.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=431662257545756

This video is amazing! I love all of the little miracles. It's such a testimony to me and just reaffirms my faith in the gospel, in my Savior, and in my Heavenly Father. I am so thankful for the First Vision, and for the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I am grateful for the Book of Mormon, and for the impact that it has had on my life, and for the love and peace that I have felt as I have read its pages and studied its messages.

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March 8, 2020:

I love this. I don't have all the answers. I don't know. I honestly don't know. I am so confused and so sad for all who are affected.

But I love this. God is a God of clarity and truth. Sometimes it seems like He has given us conflicting commandments. Sometimes it seems like He hasn't given us any answers. But I know that He loves us. I know that He wants us to be happy. So I will walk and talk with you. I will love you. Because that is what Jesus would do. And I am trying to be like Jesus. So I will do what He would do. And that is fight for you. And love you. So I will fight for you, and I will love you. Even when people tear me down because of my beliefs. Because I can be the bigger person. I can make room in my heart to love those with opposing opinions and views, even if others cannot grant me the same respect. 

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Today is also International Women's Day! I wanted to say how thankful I am for all of the women in my life: my mom, my sisters, my grandmas, my aunts, my friends. I have such amazing examples and mentors in my life. Thank you for showing me kindness, determination, charity, compassion, divinity, dedication, how to be myself, and that, no matter what, I have an armada of love behind me. 

I am grateful for my Heavenly Mother, and for the example that She is to me. I am grateful for the peace and love that I feel whenever I think of Her. I am grateful for Her quiet influence in my life. I am grateful for the love and strength that She gives me. I am grateful for the hand that She has had in my life. 

It has been a pretty busy and difficult week for me in a lot of ways, but I am so grateful for not only my Heavenly Parents and my Savior, but for my cute fiancé, who has been holding my hand (literally and figuratively) the whole week. He is my person and my rock and I can't imagine life without him.

I hope you all have a wonderful week! I am looking forward to getting some things done this week and to cross a few things off my to-do list. This will be a great week! I can do hard things! God is with me and will help me get through it, and He is with you and will help you through it, as well!! He loves you very much and is so proud of you! I love you and am proud of you as well! Keep it up! 

Xoxo

Mattie

God is mindful of you and of your journey.

What a crazy week! My root canal went better than I expected, but I definitely am still in a little bit of pain. School has been fairly okay this week, and I was blessed to have had it be pretty simple after the root canal.

I am so excited for General Conference this weekend!! I'm so excited to be able to hear from our leaders and hear what they have to say to us!!

I am thankful for the love and support of my Father in Heaven this week. I am so thankful to be able to depend on Him in my life.

I had a lot of short and sweet thoughts during fast and testimony meeting today.

-Not only does our Savior stand by us, but we stand by Him! Because He loves and trusts us to do all that He needs us to do.
-Heavenly Father hears our prayers, and is so mindful of us.
-We really had to have so much faith and trust in Jesus Christ before we came here to earth. We knew we would make mistakes, but we trusted that He wouldn't make a mistake so that we could return to live with our Heavenly Father.

I am so grateful for the journey that I've been on in my life. It's taken me to places I never thought I'd be, and it's brought people to me that I never knew I needed, but somehow they were exactly what I needed.

I'm so thankful for a Heavenly Father who knows what I need and when. I'm grateful for miracles and blessings, and I'm grateful for peace and light.

Nobody knows me better than my Father in Heaven, and I'm grateful that He is guiding me to be who I need to be. I have grown a lot in the past couple of months, and I'm honestly so proud of who I am right now. I've still got some learning to do, as we all do, but I know that I am where I am meant to be, and I know that I am who I am meant to be. God is very aware of the growth that I've needed, and He is very aware of the journey that I need to take.

Life is crazy sometimes, and sometimes I don't know what's gonna happen in my life. But I know that  my Heavenly Father is always going to be there for me, and I know that He is never going to leave me alone. He is always going to be right beside me, and He is always going to want me to stand by Him, as long as I am doing my part to share His love with everyone around me.

I hope you all have a wonderful week!

Xoxo
Mattie

What a blessing!

Today I'm grateful for a kind professor I met today.

Story time: I had two tests open this week, and I also have been working on my issues paper for my writing class, so I wasn't able to study as much as I wanted to in order to take my American Heritage test on Monday. Because today was the last day I could take it without paying for it, I was planning on studying for it between classes today and then taking the test after classes. That plan inevitably fell apart this morning when I was heading to a study group for my other test that opens this week (Physical Science, if you really want to know) and halfway to where we were meeting I realized that I forgot my notebook, and I was just like, "NO, let's not deal with that right now." So I went to my study group and afterwards I had a class. That class gets out at 1:20ish, so I was out of the building at like 1:30. Then I was hungry, so I debated and went back and forth, trying to decide if I had time to eat, grab my notebook, study, and finish my reading for my Book of Mormon class. Y'all know how I walk in circles sometimes when I can't decide which way to go? (If you didn't, you do now) Well, I was doing that outside, and I was really frustrated so I kicked a bench, and this professor was walking by, and he was like, "Are you okay?" And I told him I was fine, I was just a little frustrated. GUYS. He stopped to talk to me, and asked me what was wrong, and he offered to pay for my test!!! He was like, "Have you eaten?" And I said no. He said to go eat. And then he gave me his contact information and said, "Let me know when you're going to take your test and I'll pay for it." As I turned around to go to eat in the Wilk, I almost cried because that professor didn't have to do that. Listening to me was all that he needed to do, but he went above and beyond.

Miracles and tender mercies.

Okay, I had a miracle happen this week. I had to take a president's test for history and I had to memorize lots of people, parties, and facts. It was the last week of term, and I had to have the test taken by Friday, or yesterday. I studied my heart out all last weekend and all this week until Thursday because Friday after school I was originally supposed to have auditions for chamber orchestra that day after school, so I couldn't take the test on Friday--also I didn't want to take it on Friday because if I failed I'd have to take it again right after and that would be no fun. Anyway. I took the test on Thursday, and I thought I did okay--fabulous on the first part, and a little iffy on the last part--which I hadn't fully memorized, so shh...I worried about it all day, studied a little more during orchestra because Mrs. Kelley told me to, and just kind of flew through the day, not knowing what was going to happen because chamber auditions had been changed to the 31st, so I couldn't tell if Life liked me or if it was going to hate me by the end of day and I'd have to take the test again. Thankfully, I passed! I know I wouldn't have been able to do it without my Heavenly Father's help, or my sister's--she helped me study. I know that The Lord blessed me to be able to memorize all that I needed to in a week, and to remember some random stuff from my four years of honors history. It was such a tender mercy and I'm so thankful for His hand in my life.

Thankful for miracles.

Opening night was tonight!! We did awesome. It ran WAAAAAY smoother than Wednesday and I know it was the hand of The Lord. My solo was amazing, and made several people cry/almost cry. It made Sister Riggs forget her job! Oops...Anyway, I'm so glad I could share the message of Holy Father and I can't wait to do so again. Also, I witnessed another miracle tonight: I was changing my shirt for the next scene and one of my earrings flew out of my ear (literally) but left the back behind. So I took my other one out and handed everything to Keely, who, after she left, gave it to a leader who kept it for me until after the show. Then I went back to look for my earring, stating so, and the leader up there said "Little flower?" And I said "Yup" and he said "Here ya go...I could only find the one part" and I said that's okay I had everything else. Nothing was broken and I found all the pieces. What a miracle!! I'm so thankful for my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and His example to me. I know He died for us all and I love Him for that. 

Happiness comes in small miracles.

Two (well, one, really) amazing things happened to me today. One!! Is that I had no math homework. Which means that I spent most of the afternoon (with large breaks) working on my English expository essay due tomorrow. That's not really amazing, except for the fact that I was pretty much able to do it, with help from my daddy. Anyway. Two!! Is that I got the solo in the cultural event!!!!!!!!! Dude!! I have been so excited and happy all day that I have had tears in my eyes, I was so happy. It really calmed me down; I'd been so anxious about it, worrying that I wouldn't get it, when everyone was telling me I would. I had hoped I would, because, not to toot my own horn or anything, I am a really good singer. I really am, and I had really hoped I would get it. I've tried out for several solos before that I have not gotten, so I really, really wanted this one. Plus, it's so high and so pretty and I just love it. So, that's just a small part of what The Lord blessed me with today. What has He blessed you with today?

Just look.

Some days it is just so much easier to see the hand of The Lord than other days. Sometimes it's some weeks, sometimes it's some months. But I love it. I love recognizing His hand in my life. I love realizing that the world is so much bigger, so much better than I've thought. One of my favorite hymns is "How Great Thou Art" because it's so pretty and I love the message it gives. There are miracles in our lives everyday. We just have to look for them.

Miracles and testimonies.

I KNOW without a DOUBT that I have seen the hand of The Lord in my life the past two weeks, and especially today. I had 35 chapters of the Book of Mormon to read today, and I finished them all within five or ten minutes of my interview with the bishop. It was a miracle and a testimony strengthener to me that with The Lord you can do miracles. I'm so thankful for this gospel. There is no way it isn't true, not after the miracles I've witnessed these last two weeks and today. I'm so grateful for Personal Progress and the strengthening that it did to my testimony, especially the past two weeks. 

I love The Lord with all of my heart and I love this gospel to the ends of the universe and back. Read the Book of Mormon. There's NO way it isn't true. I know, because I've read it. :)