He hears, He waits, He loves.

It wasn't even a question what I was going to focus on today. It was set up so perfectly this morning.

Thoughts during the sacrament:
So I was listening to some music this morning while I was getting ready for church, and one song that played was one that I love called "Every Word" (it can be found here), and I was thinking about the sacrament hymn, "God Our Father Hear Us Pray", and I couldn't help but connect them and think, He hears us. He hears EVERY word. Unspoken, spoken, or hidden deep inside. He hears you. He always hears you. He hears your cries of desperation, your cries of longing, your cries of fear. He hears your prayers–prayers of answers long searched for, of the fear of failure, of pain you wish was gone. He hears it all. Don't think, even for a second, that you mean nothing to Him. Heavenly Father sent His Only Begotten Son to die for us, and Jesus Christ suffered and died for YOU. Our Savior suffered so that He could be with us every step of the way on our path. So don't you even doubt that He hears you, because I know that He does. He hears you, even if the answers don't come right away. I know that He will answer you when He knows that you're ready. And I know that He always hears you.

The main theme that the speakers touched during sacrament meeting was on obedience, which, to me was kind of...not necessarily needed, but needed...I know that doesn't make sense, and I apologize but I'm going to move on.

The first speaker mentioned the fact that Jesus Christ never questioned why, but He did it anyway. He may have questioned how, but never why. He just followed His Father's commandments exactly. Obviously we're human and we make mistakes, so we will never be able to follow the commandments exactly, but we can work on progressing with the help of our Savior. Heavenly Father lets us know the rules–what we need to do and how. He's not going to leave us in the dark; He lets us know, and He waits for us to begin–for the first time, or again.

The second speaker, Brother Huish, said something that I thought was cool. He said just because we may want to defy them (God's commandments) doesn't mean that they don't exist. He also said "Obedience leads to true freedom." He also quoted Joseph Smith, who said, "All persons are entitled to their agency for God has so ordained it". We all have our agency, and we can all choose whether or not to obey God's commandments, or the laws of the land, but we don't get to choose the consequences of our actions. Another thing he said was that, if we are striving to do all that we can, though we won't achieve perfection in this life, we can progress with our Savior's aid. David O. McKay once said, "Self-control means the government and regulation of all our natural appetites, desires, passions, and affections; and there is nothing that gives a man such strength of character as the sense of self-conquest, the realization that he can make his appetites and passions serve him and that he is not a servant to them." Basically, he is saying that we are in charge of our appetites and desires, not the other way around. The last thing that Brother Huish said was that the Savior is the key in all of this. And He is. He is the way, the truth, and the light. He is the only way back to our Heavenly Father.

In Gospel Doctrine we talked about foreordination, and how we are all pre-destined to be someone or do something in this life. We also talked a little about repentance, and how we shouldn't procrastinate repenting; someone said that as soon as they begin the repentance process, they feel better, so why procrastinate that change, and the peace that comes with it? One of the last thoughts I had at the end of the lesson was "God watches and waits for us to come to Him." And He does. Even if you don't go to Him, though, He will still be there, watching out for you.

Relief Society was great!! We're singing in church in a couple weeks and we started to practice the song today. I'm not going to tell you what song it is yet, but it is one of my favorites and it is one I've sung before (several times, if I'm not mistaken). :)

Anyway, the lesson was on Elder Oaks' talk from April 2016 conference entitled "Opposition In All Things". The sister who was teaching (I think her name was Ashley) said that struggle is needed for us to be strengthened, and this is so true. We can't become stronger if we are not tested. In order for us to have alternative choices and be able to use our agency, we need opposition. Trials are specifically tailored to us, to help us grow into who we are supposed to become. I was so grateful for something that one of the sisters said when she related an experience she'd had, which is one that I've kind of had, and we had reached similar conclusions in how to deal with it, and it was just a testimony to me (again) that we all go through similar experiences all the time, even if we don't know it. Even though she and I both want some things that aren't happening for us right now, we both have had similar experiences in getting an answer of sorts, and knowing that we are becoming who we are meant to be. She also said that the Lord doesn't make it easy for us, but He does make it possible. I love that. If we keep on trying, things will work out. Trials remind us that Heavenly Father has a plan for us that is so much bigger than we can even imagine! Trials are meant to refine us, and Heavenly Father will never give us anything to go through that we are not capable of going through. And when it becomes too much for us, we will always be able to lean on our Savior, and on our family and friends.

Heavenly Father loves us so much!! He wants us to be able to return to Him, but we have to become something better than we are now in order for us to be able to live with Him. So He gives us trials, experiences, and people in our lives that will help us become who He knows we can become. I know that He listens. I know that He wants what is best for us, and I know that He will not leave us alone on the path to becoming who we were meant to be. <3

With Him, we can.

Normally on Sundays I reflect on the things I learned in church that day (which I might end up doing later). But right now I want to talk about something that I've kind of recently come to really understand.

It doesn't matter what others think about you. I know, I know–you care about people because they're important to you, and you want to know what they think about you. But, in the end, it really doesn't matter. They will never be able to fully understand you.

They don't know your story.

They may know some things, but it's hard to understand things that you yourself haven't been through. And sometimes there are just some things you might not want to talk about. They don't know the nights you cried because you felt lost and unloved. They don't know that your mother's aunt tried to commit suicide. They don't know the time your little brother disappeared and your whole family thought that he ran away and your mother was crying and you hated your little brother in that moment for making your mom cry. (Side note: I feel like I should make it known that none of these things happened to me specifically. I think I found most of these instances in books I read or heard about)

They don't know those things. They don't know why you do what you do. They don't know everything that makes you you.

The only person who knows your story exactly as you've experienced it is Jesus Christ–who's lived your story personally so that He could be able to help you through it, if you let Him.

He suffered for your pains, your sicknesses, your infirmities, your griefs, anything emotional, physical, or mental that you have/had to deal with, your temptations, and also for your sins. He suffered for EVERYTHING that you have experienced, and everything that you will ever experience.

He loves you SO MUCH that He wanted to be able to be there for you whenever you need Him. He wanted you to be able to turn to Him for anything and everything that you struggle with. You struggle with being patient? He's there to help you. You struggle with loving yourself? He's there to help you. You struggle with believing in Him?  He is there for you!

There is nothing that you have gone through that He has not experienced. He experienced everything so that He could help you. He walked alone so that you don't have to.

In sacrament meeting today, two of my friends performed the song "The Miracle" (which can be found here), and I love that song so much! Hearing them sing it made me cry because I could feel the Spirit, and it was just so beautiful and I felt like there was a message in it for me specifically. One of my favorite lines is, "But I know this: of all His miracles, the most incredible must be the miracle that rescues me." He loves you, and wants you to be able to live with our Heavenly Father again, and so He atoned and died for you so that that could happen.

"It is never too late so long as the Master of the vineyard says there is time," (Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "It Is Never Too Late," April 2012).

Today has been a great day, full of messages that I needed to hear and think about. I am so grateful for my Savior, and for the love that He had for me, and for all of us, and for His sacrifice in the Garden of Gethsemane, and on the cross at Calvary. His Atonement has helped me, has healed me, and has given me peace. I know that I am never alone, and with Him, I can get through anything. I had a super hard trial a couple of years ago, and I am still feeling its aftereffects, but I got through it with Him. I wasn't alone. That's such a blessing and comfort to me. And, because of that experience, I know that I can do hard things. I know that life is hard, and that sometimes there are things that happen that just put you so far out there that you don't think that you can return, but with Him, we can (that is also the title of a song that I love. It can be found here). He will never leave you alone. He will always be there to aid you. This I know, and bear testimony of in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Being an instrument in the Lord's hands.

I have a story. It's actually a very longish story, so bear with me. 

Tuesday night (so, yesterday, May 5th, 2015) for Young Women's, we made truffles for our mothers for Mother's Day. Me being the kind and sweet person I am, I decided to make an additional one for my orchestra teacher--this year is her first Mother's Day with her baby outside of her womb. So, I okayed it with Sister Johnson and I made another one.

Today I had an AP test this morning, which means that I missed first period (my TA period for my orchestra teacher) and second period (orchestra), as well as third (not important, but it was Foods). After my test, I got lunch and ate with my friends and then went to the orchestra room to relax and tell my teacher how it went. Anyway, we talked a lot and she told me how her weekend was and I told her how my test went. I could tell she was a little stressed, annoyed, and tired. She's got a lot going on--our concert is on Tuesday and we have an awards banquet on Monday, and school is coming to a close so she's got grades to do, and we are playing at graduation. So, I went to fourth period, and, after okaying it with my teacher, I left a little early to help my orchestra teacher [Because a), she had asked me to. 2) I wanted to. Three) I felt bad that I had missed my TA period even though she'd already told me before that it was no big deal]. I helped her check and make sure she typed some of the awards correctly, and then I had to go. I later contacted her about something my brothers had done, and then I sent her a music pun:

Realizing as I read it that it may have sounded like I was calling her an angry conductor, I quickly clarified that I didn't think that she was an angry orchestra conductor, I just thought that "tempo tantrum" was hilarious. And then she told me that she'd locked her keys in her car (When I get a car, I am sure I will do this several times) and I felt so bad for her because she'd been having a rough day, and so I sent her this picture: 

And then I just told her that I was sorry that she'd had a bad day. I let her know that I know that she works hard and that I know she's trying and I said that I really admire and look up to her and I know that she's amazing. And then she thanked me and I felt all warm and fuzzy inside, like when you know you've done something good. And then I realized about an hour or so ago that I was giving her the chocolates on Friday! She loves chocolate. And I was like, "I've been an instrument in the Lord's hands! I'm going to be an instrument in His hands! I'm going to make her week awesome!"And I just know that the Lord helped me know what to say to her, and when to say it to her, and I know that He inspired me to make a box of chocolates for her so that she would feel loved, important, of worth, and that she was doing something right. 

In the October 2000 General Conference, in her talk "We Are Instruments in the Hands of God", Sister Mary Ellen Smoot said, "Service is a key to being an effective instrument." And today I served my orchestra teacher by letting her know that I saw her, and that I know that she is trying. I let her know that she is amazing, and I admire and look up to her. She may have felt like she wasn't doing a good job, but I let her know that she was, and I didn't even know that she felt like she wasn't doing a good job. 

God works in mysterious ways–I only knew part of the story, but I was able to address the whole story, and I know that that was because of Heavenly Father. I know that He watches out for us. I know that He loves and cares for us. I know that He sends us what we need when we need it through others. I know that we are instruments in the Lord's hands when we serve others and when we do anything Christlike. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. 

Never give up.

I just want you to know that you should never give up. It is better to try and fail than to have never tried at all. Keep trying! Don't give up. Life is good. Things happen for a reason. But don't give up. God has a plan for you. So keep trying and remember that things happen for a reason.

Saw this quote on Facebook and LOVED it! Thought I'd share:

Thomas S. Monson: Love doesn’t grow like weeds or fall like rain. Love has its price. ‘God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life’. That Son, even the Lord Jesus Christ, gave His life that we might have eternal life, so great was His love for His Father and for us.

Do you know that we are all human? We all make mistakes. But guess what? God loves us. We are imperfect, yet He still loves us. He gave His Only Begotten Son so that we could return to live with Him. He has to deal with us all day, all the time–sometimes we are worse than normal–but He still loves us. He will always love us. So don't give up. He will you give you so many chances, again and again, because He loves us. He will not let us go anywhere alone. He will not leave you alone.

He loves us perfectly.

I love this! Even though we are imperfect people, He loves us perfectly. And that love will never change. There is nothing you can do to make Him stop loving you. There is a song, entitled "Miracle" that I love. The version I first heard of was by Daniel Beck (whom I love), but it looks like Celine Dion (who I also love) performed it first. Either way, it is an amazing song (You can find Daniel's version on iTunes or here and you can find Celine's version here). I love it because it's such a sweet song. At first, I thought the song was from the perspective of our Savior, so I looked up the lyrics (mostly because I couldn't figure out the title of the song or anything because I only remembered one line, "There is nothing you can do to make me stop loving you") and found that is actually the song of a parent to their child, and so it could be from the perspective of our Heavenly Father, who loves us so much, or our Savior, who loves us so much that He died for us. Nothing we could ever do would make Them stop loving us. We are imperfect people, yet They love us perfectly. <3

The Savior empowers us with His grace, not because
we've earned it, but because He loves us perfectly.

Christ and His Atonement are always there for us.

Today we learned about the Atonement. I'm so, so grateful for the Atonement. Honestly, I don't know what I'd do without the Atonement. It's helped me in so many ways...when I've done something wrong, when I've felt alone, when I've felt lost, when I get hurt, when I've felt sad...Christ (and His Atonement) has always been there for me, and I'm so thankful. I'm thankful that He didn't just suffer for my sins, He suffered for my pains, my afflictions, when I've had to deal with death—He suffered for all of that. He's the only one who knows EXACTLY how I feel. I mean, sure, people who have been through similar situations can kind of sympathize. Also those who have gone through the deaths that I have have felt as sad as I did, surely, but we all went through it differently, and He is the only one who knows exactly how we dealt with it, and I'm grateful that I'm not the only one who knows what I go through in life. There are times when I am extremely disappointed in myself and I feel really bad but I know that He is right there, waiting for me to make things right. Even when I don't deserve it. Even when I was so, so stupid and I did something so, so wrong and I definitely didn't deserve to be forgiven, He was (and is) right there—waiting for me to forgive myself so I can move on with my life. I know there are times when we don't feel worthy, but we need to repent. We need to change—change our heart, and our actions, and our circumstances. We sometimes try to, but we can't do it alone, which is why Heavenly Father gave us His Son, Jesus Christ. So we don't have to do it alone. We never have to do it alone. It's so hard to do it alone, so please turn to Him. He loves you so much.