"Ask Him how He feels about you. And then listen."

It's General Conference weekend!! I love General Conference so much!

The main messages that I got this weekend was to love (God, your neighbor, your family), increase your faith, and do better to share your testimony.

I have been thinking a lot this week in preparation for General Conference, and one thing that I have really been thinking about is love for others no matter what. It's hard for me to understand why people can't love others. It frustrates me when people complain about things that they don't like about people because they think they hate a specific group of people, and then they in turn hate the people they are criticizing. It's hypocritical of them. We might not agree with everyone, but we need to love everyone. There is this quote that I love that I think speaks volumes:



I don't always agree with people. There are a lot of people in my life that I have different opinions than. But guess what? I still love them. It's not that hard. Just because I don't agree with someone's lifestyle, opinions, or choices doesn't mean that I fear or hate them. We can have differing lifestyles, opinions, and choices and still be kind and compassionate to each other. This is something that I think people forget or don't understand. It's not hard to love and support each other even though you don't have the same views.

I am so grateful for General Conference weekend! This weekend has been a blessing! I have received a confirmation to an answer that I received a few weeks ago and I am so excited to implement the lessons that I have learned this weekend! I am excited to draw closer to my Father in Heaven and my Savior. I am grateful for the blessings of the temple and the opportunities I have to attend the temple and do the work for my ancestors and for those who have come before me.

I am far from perfect, but I can't wait to love more, have faith more, bless more, and share more.

Xoxo
Mattie

Hard is good.

I think I'm just going to stop saying, "It's been a crazy week" and let you guys assume it's been a crazy week. 🤣 Despite the craziness of the last couple weeks, however, I am feeling really blessed this weekend. This week, I've been able to be comforted and feel peace. Currently I have really mainly stressed about life after graduation, but I've realized I don't have to be. I've learned that sometimes I overthink things and I just need to make a decision. God wants me to do what I want to do. I've been asking Him for guidance, and I've been so focused on what He wants me to do, but I think that He wants me to know that it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether I stay in Provo or Lehi, or even if I leave Utah. As long as I follow my heart.

In the April 2017 General Conference, Sister Linda K. Burton gave a talk entitled, "Certain Women" that I really loved. Certain, in this case, means, "positive", "convinced", "definite", "firm", and "dependable". She said that "certain women are disciples centered in the Savior Jesus Christ and have hope through the promise of His atoning sacrifice." I loved that! Certain women have so much faith in our Savior and sacrifice so much to serve and bless the lives of those around them. I love this talk so much because it shows so many examples of righteous women who never gave up on their Savior. And I'd love to be just like them someday. I am trying every day to center my life on Christ and have faith and hope in His atoning sacrifice.

Sometimes my life doesn't always go the way that I want it to. But every week I try again. Every day, actually. And I am not always perfect at it. But I am trying. And that's all that God asks. He asks that I do my best. And some days...some days my best is not as much as it was the day before...but it is still my best. And that is all that matters.

Sometimes it's hard to understand why things happen the way that they do, and why we all have different personal struggles. But it's important to remember that not only do we all learn in different ways, but hard is good. We learn more when we are being challenged, and all of the trials and struggles in our life lead us to improvement. You can't know happiness if you don't know sorrow. You can't know love if you don't know hate. You can't know peace if you don't know turmoil. 

Elder Stanley G. Ellis said, "In the world of nature, hard is part of the circle of life. It is hard for a baby chick to hatch out of that tough eggshell. But when someone tries to make it easier, the chick does not develop the strength necessary to live. In a similar way, the struggle of a butterfly to escape the cocoon strengthens it for the life it will live." 

Why should we be any different? We all have challenges. The only difference is how we react to those challenges. If we embrace the challenges, and use them to better ourselves, we can grow, and become stronger, and then the Lord will be able to use us to help others around us. 

I find that in the midst of my challenges and trials, when I take the time to visit the temple, read my scriptures, ponder, and pray, life makes a lot more sense. I am able to see beyond the trials and trust in my Father in Heaven. Sometimes it doesn't always work, I won't lie to you. There are some things that I can't see beyond–and trusting that Heavenly Father knows what is best for me in that moment is slightly difficult–but because things have worked out in the past and I have been able to see connections and find answers, I am able to just hope and have faith. I hope that things will work out and I have faith that Heavenly Father knows what is best for me, and that I am on the right path. 

I know that Heavenly Father loves each and every one of us, and I know that He only wants what is best for us. He wants us to be the best that we can be, and He wants us to turn to Him for help and guidance on our journey back to Him. 

Xoxo

Mattie

Trust Him, and trust His timing.

While I was sitting during the passing of the sacrament, I decided to read one of my favorite passages of scripture about the Atonement, and I had these thoughts:

Alma 7:11-13 is one of my favorite passages about the Atonement. It really emphasizes more of what Jesus felt and had to go through for us. I love that it emphasizes 'according to the flesh'. It gives me a better idea of what kinds of things He went through for me. He knows how difficult it is to overcome temptations, and He knows how hard heartbreak is. He knows how much I try to rise above my depression and anxiety, but He also knows how hard it is, and how disappointed in myself I am when I can't rise above it. He knows it all. And He knows how to help. Each person and each situation is completely unique, but He knows exactly what you need. <3

One of my favorite things that some people said in their testimonies today was that Heavenly Father loves us. And He wants what is best for us. And sometimes what is best for us is different than what is best for someone else, but that doesn't mean that what is best for you or them isn't what is best for you or them. Does that make sense? Just because someone else's best isn't your best doesn't meant that your best is any less.

Kelli said in her testimony something that I loved. "It's not the sin that makes Him cringe; it's when we don't repent that makes Him cringe." I loved that! It doesn't matter if it's the same sins over and over again...as long as we keep trying, and we repent, He is happy. He knows we are mortal and human, and we make mistakes. He doesn't expect us to be perfect right now, but He expects us to try to be better today than we were yesterday. And it is up to us to determine how close we are to God. God is right there waiting for us; we have to make an effort to draw close(r) to Him.

Kaitlin said, "Sometimes we don't know where we're going in our lives, but when we trust Him, and trust that He has a plan, He will guide us and bless us." I loved that. It's important to have a general plan, but honestly, most of the time we don't know where we are going in life. So we need to trust Him. He has a plan for each of us. He will guide us and bless us, and help us become who He knows we can become, and He can help us get to where we need to be.

Dallin said that, "Every time we follow the Spirit, we can be an instrument in people's lives." I loved this. It's so important for us to follow the Spirit and help those around us. We never know completely what's going on, but Heavenly Father does, and He sends us to help those who really need help and love.

Ingrid said, "He loves us and we are not forgotten." I loved that!! He KNOWS us! He LOVES us! We are HIS! How loved we are by the Creator and ruler of all! We are NEVER forgotten!! We are so important to Him, and we are SO LOVED!!

If you do your best, He will make up the rest.

I finished packing most of my clothes today!! A lady in my ward came over and helped me, and we fit a ton of stuff that I wouldn't have been able to fit into my suitcase had I done it by myself. I have a few pieces of clothing that I will be packing in a smaller suitcase, along with a lot of the stuff that I am currently using. 

I decided yesterday that the wait is mostly what's killing me about this big new step called College. 

Now that I'm pretty much done with most of my packing, I'm feeling very excited about moving. It's weird because school doesn't start until the 31st, but I move out next week, and it's especially weird because I keep thinking about it in two different mindsets: a) school doesn't start till the end of the month; and 2) I move out next week. It's all very confusifying. I don't even understand it myself.

Anyway...

Tonight I was reading in Jarom and it says in the first chapter and ninth verse that, "Inasmuch as ye will keep my commandments ye shall prosper in the land." This means that you will be blessed for keeping the commandments. I know that this is true. I've seen it in my own life, and I'm grateful that the Lord blesses me for trying to do my best. 

When I fail (because I do fail; often, actually), I get really sad and kind of mad at myself. Why? Because I know that I: 1) hurt someone in the process (either myself or someone else, and the Lord); and b) disappointed not only myself, but my Savior and my Heavenly Father. I'm trying really hard to do the best I can, but sometimes I fall short. It's comforting to know that if I do my best, He will make up the rest. I know He loves me. I know He died for me and for you. I know that He will help you with anything you need help with. I know that He is always there for you. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

"Ask, and it shall be given you"

Totally random, but I changed the look of my blog. And I know most people won't have seen the old version, but I'm just letting you know it didn't always look the way it does now. Anyway, that's not what I wanted to talk about.

In one week, I will be back in school. And I'm frightened. So, so frightened. But I'm also excited. It's a toss up. I'm frightened because it's my last year in high school and what if I fail some of my classes???? I am a good student, but sometimes I worry about "what if I fail?" and I just don't want to be held back because I failed a class. I'm excited because it's my last year in high school!! Woohoo!!

So you see why it's a toss up.

But I have this paper—like a spiritual directory—and for "When you need help in school", the scripture to look at is Doctrine and Covenants 136:32, and it reads: "Let him that is ignorant learn wisdom by humbling himself and calling upon the Lord his God, that his eyes may be opened that he may see, and his ears opened that he might hear". And here is one that I love in St. Matthew 7:7: "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you". And I know that if I have trouble this year in school—or anywhere I'm ignorant, really—I can ask my Heavenly Father and He will help me, as long as I do my part and do my best first before I ask for a little more help, He will answer my prayers. And I know that you can ask, too, and He will also help you.