Moments.

Despite the challenges we have been facing as we try to start our family, we continue to experience moments of hope, along with moments of heartache. Some news we received this past week was not what we had hoped it would be. As a result, I have had an emotionally and spiritually draining week as I tried to deal with my emotions, connect with Heavenly Father, and figure out what is next for not only me, but our little family. My thoughts have kept turning to a few things Ricky and I are discussing for the future, and I am just so grateful for his love and support during this difficult trial.

An Act of Astonishing Bravery

Today is Holy Monday. Today is the day Jesus visited and cleansed the temple.

From the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints' website today:

During Jesus’s time in Jerusalem, He visits the temple. There, inside His Father’s house, Jesus sees various merchants doing business. To see a place of worship converted into a center of commerce is something that Jesus cannot abide. Speaking with unmistakable authority, He commands them to leave. The cleansing of the temple at Jerusalem was an act of astonishing bravery. We can take courage knowing that Jesus Christ did what He knew to be right, whether it was popular or not.

#BecauseOfHim, I have courage

“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” —Philippians 4:13​​

What task feels especially difficult for you right now? It could be setting up a therapy appointment, asking for a raise at work, or reconciling with a loved one. Today, make a plan to accomplish it. Jesus can help you find the courage you need.

Something that has been a challenge for me recently is very personal, so I will not be sharing specifically what it is, but what I have been doing to overcome it has been because of Him. Because of Him, I have chosen to keep pressing forward. Because of Him, I have chosen to continue to have faith in Him. Because of Him, I have been brave in being honest with myself about the things I am going through. Because of Him, I can do hard things.

I am ever so grateful for His example of strength and courage in times of duress! There were many times throughout His life that He needed to have courage, just like all of us! I love that we are able to see how human Jesus really was at times, because it makes it easier to connect with Him when we realize that He knows what we are going through!

Xoxo

Mattie

The focus of our lives should be on Jesus Christ.

I’m loving this new year already!

I've been striving really hard this week to study my scriptures every day, and I am proud of my progress. :)

Two of my brothers were ordained to advancing offices in the Aaronic Priesthood and I am so proud of them! My little brothers are growing up so fast and are such sweet and smart little dudes!

This week was a bit of a challenge in some ways, but I am grateful for the lessons that I learned through those challenges. I learned that nothing is worth mental, emotional, or physical agony. I learned that communication is a two-way street, and as much fun as texting is, the important conversations need to be had in person.

In Relief Society, we talked about Elder Holland's October 2019 General Conference talk entitled "The Message, the Meaning, and the Multitude". There are five main points that he explores in his talk that we discussed.

• Surround yourself with spiritually sensitive people.
• I loved this! These 'spiritually sensitive people' don't have to be of your same beliefs or faith. It is possible to be surrounded by spiritually sensitive people of many different beliefs and faiths. As long as they are uplifting and allow you to do and be what you believe you need to do and be, they can be a spiritually sensitive person for you.
• In the commotion, fix our attention on Him.
• In the commotion of life, we need to fix our attention on Him. He is the Light of the World, and He will keep us grounded and sure.
• We must focus on the Savior in the temple.
• The temple is a wonderful and beautiful place. We go there first to make our own covenants, and then to help others make their own covenants and remember our own. We go to focus on the Lord, and to respect Him, and to remember His gospel.
• The real reason for revelatory adjustments is to focus on Christ.
• There have been many adjustments in the Church recently, and they are helping us to remember the heart of the gospel, which is that it is the Gospel of Jesus Christ, and this is His Church. We must never forget that. That is why there have been many changes recently. They are helping us to focus on the Savior.
• Learn from the First Vision Jesus' divine identity.
• Heavenly Father said to Joseph, "Joseph, this is my Beloved Son. Hear Him!" Jesus is the Son of God. Elder Holland said it best: "No greater expression of Jesus’s divine identity, His primacy in the plan of salvation, and His standing in the eyes of God could ever exceed that short seven-word declaration."

I am ever so grateful for my fiancé! We went to the temple yesterday and did some sealings and I just love going to the temple with him! Afterwards, he let me take some pictures of him! I am so excited to be marrying him and I get so emotional just thinking about it! I am so, so blessed to have been chosen by him! 💜

This week is going to be fun! I will make it fun! Looking on the bright side of things is something that I used to do when I was younger and I want it to make a comeback in my life.

God is so good, you guys! I love Him, and know that He loves you. This year will be an amazing one! Can't wait to experience it all with my best friend! 💜

Xoxo

Mattie

Hard is good.

I think I'm just going to stop saying, "It's been a crazy week" and let you guys assume it's been a crazy week. 🤣 Despite the craziness of the last couple weeks, however, I am feeling really blessed this weekend. This week, I've been able to be comforted and feel peace. Currently I have really mainly stressed about life after graduation, but I've realized I don't have to be. I've learned that sometimes I overthink things and I just need to make a decision. God wants me to do what I want to do. I've been asking Him for guidance, and I've been so focused on what He wants me to do, but I think that He wants me to know that it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter whether I stay in Provo or Lehi, or even if I leave Utah. As long as I follow my heart.

In the April 2017 General Conference, Sister Linda K. Burton gave a talk entitled, "Certain Women" that I really loved. Certain, in this case, means, "positive", "convinced", "definite", "firm", and "dependable". She said that "certain women are disciples centered in the Savior Jesus Christ and have hope through the promise of His atoning sacrifice." I loved that! Certain women have so much faith in our Savior and sacrifice so much to serve and bless the lives of those around them. I love this talk so much because it shows so many examples of righteous women who never gave up on their Savior. And I'd love to be just like them someday. I am trying every day to center my life on Christ and have faith and hope in His atoning sacrifice.

Sometimes my life doesn't always go the way that I want it to. But every week I try again. Every day, actually. And I am not always perfect at it. But I am trying. And that's all that God asks. He asks that I do my best. And some days...some days my best is not as much as it was the day before...but it is still my best. And that is all that matters.

Sometimes it's hard to understand why things happen the way that they do, and why we all have different personal struggles. But it's important to remember that not only do we all learn in different ways, but hard is good. We learn more when we are being challenged, and all of the trials and struggles in our life lead us to improvement. You can't know happiness if you don't know sorrow. You can't know love if you don't know hate. You can't know peace if you don't know turmoil. 

Elder Stanley G. Ellis said, "In the world of nature, hard is part of the circle of life. It is hard for a baby chick to hatch out of that tough eggshell. But when someone tries to make it easier, the chick does not develop the strength necessary to live. In a similar way, the struggle of a butterfly to escape the cocoon strengthens it for the life it will live." 

Why should we be any different? We all have challenges. The only difference is how we react to those challenges. If we embrace the challenges, and use them to better ourselves, we can grow, and become stronger, and then the Lord will be able to use us to help others around us. 

I find that in the midst of my challenges and trials, when I take the time to visit the temple, read my scriptures, ponder, and pray, life makes a lot more sense. I am able to see beyond the trials and trust in my Father in Heaven. Sometimes it doesn't always work, I won't lie to you. There are some things that I can't see beyond–and trusting that Heavenly Father knows what is best for me in that moment is slightly difficult–but because things have worked out in the past and I have been able to see connections and find answers, I am able to just hope and have faith. I hope that things will work out and I have faith that Heavenly Father knows what is best for me, and that I am on the right path. 

I know that Heavenly Father loves each and every one of us, and I know that He only wants what is best for us. He wants us to be the best that we can be, and He wants us to turn to Him for help and guidance on our journey back to Him. 

Xoxo

Mattie

The most important thing you can do as a human is to LOVE.

***I am apologizing in advance for the scatterbrained nature of this post, but this is just kind of how it happened in my head. I don't entirely know how to fix it but I hope the images help. :)

First and foremost, for those of you who only follow me on my blog, I made a big adult decision this week and I bought my first car!! I'm soo excited to finally have a car, and I'm so excited to be able to not rely on my parents for rides anymore!! It's a cute little Geo Prizm and I'm excited to be able to drive it (just as soon as I get it registered this week). I am finally feeling like I am sort of starting to get ahold of my life, and it's a great feeling. :)

Be yourself.

Okay, so now that that's out of the way, this has been a great week! I have learned a lot and I have come to some conclusions about myself and what I want, and need, and I am excited to move forward from here. One thing that I have learned this week is to just be yourself! I know that this is something that people say all the time, but it really is true! You will 1) be more happy because you don't have to pretend to be a different person, and 2) learn that people need you for who you ARE, not for who you think other people want you to be.

Integrity

Integrity: the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.

Integrity is a lot of things, but I think the definition of integrity that I love the most is: integrity is being the same person no matter where you are, or who you are surrounded (or not surrounded) by. If there happens to be two random people who know you, and they get to talking about you, they will be talking about the exact same version of you because you are always yourself, and you are always the same person, no matter the setting. It's important to be honest with others, but it's also important to be honest with yourself. But how can you be honest with yourself if you're not always yourself? Be true to yourself, no matter where you are. 

Struggle

One thing that I was thinking about during Sunday School today as were were discussing the story of Job was that it's okay to struggle. Even Jesus struggled. No one in the whole history of Earth has escaped the trial of struggling with something. Everyone struggles, has struggled, or will struggle with something. We are not perfect, but even He who was the most perfect being on Earth struggled. We are in good company! He knows how we feel! And He will be there for us when we need Him.

You are special.

Sister Larsen read the story "You Are Special" by Max Lucado in Relief Society today. Let me tell you, friends, that this is my ABSOLUTE favorite children's book, but there are several others by Max Lucado that are close seconds and thirds. ANYWAY that is not the point of me mentioning that story. 

For those of you who have never heard this story before, this story is about a town of Wemmicks, who are little wooden people that were created by Eli, the woodworker (you can hear some British guy reading the story here). The Wemmicks all have boxes of little gray dots, and little gold stars, and they put them on other Wemmicks based on their looks, and what they do. There is a little Wemmick named Punchinello who only has gray dots, and he meets this Wemmick named Lucia, who has no stars or dots. He asks her why she has no dots or stars, and she says it is because every day she goes to see Eli, the maker. So Punchinello goes to see Eli one day. And there is where my favorite quotes of all time happen. 

"What they think doesn't matter, Punchinello. All that matters is what I think. And I think you are pretty special." 

Punchinello asks, "Why do I matter to you?" Eli replies, "Because you are mine. That's why you matter to me."

"The more you trust my love, the less you care about their stickers."

"You are special because I made you. And I don't make mistakes."

This story is an allegory–its deeper, hidden meaning is that this story represents our relationship with Heavenly Father. We are the Wemmicks, and He is Eli, the woodworker. He made us just the way we are, and He doesn't make mistakes. 

Value

Our value comes from God. We came to Earth with value. It just exists. We can't add to or detract from it. It is simply always there. Just like God's love for us. He loves us deeply, and forever. 

He will help you understand as you turn to Him.

People will always judge us, and give us "stickers" or "labels". But they only stick if we let them. If we turn to God, and trust in Him, and trust in His love, and trust in His ability to create things perfectly (not that we are perfect, He has just made us perfectly), the judgements and opinions of others won't matter quite so much. Eventually, hopefully, they won't matter at all. 

Life is certainly difficult, and we all have things to overcome, but I know that as we turn to God, and trust in Him, life will be easier to deal with. I'm not saying that things will become perfect overnight, or that you'll never have trials or challenges ever again, because that is definitely not true. But what I am saying is that having God on your side, and knowing that He is there to help you, and to lift you, will make things easier to bear. As you turn to Him, and trust in His love, you might not get the answers you want, but don't lose hope. God is there for you, forever and always, and He will not let you down. He is leading you, guiding you, and walking beside you. He's there to help you find your place in this world, and He is there to help you find your path. 

Nothing is more important than your relationship with your Heavenly Father and your Savior. Sadly, people will come and go in your lives–either physically, or socially. Sometimes you will grow apart. Whatever the circumstances are, there is always going to be change in the relationships in your life. However, your Father in Heaven, and your Savior, will always be there for you. Their love for you will never change, and They will always be there for you, even if you go away for awhile. So the most important relationship you can have is with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ because They will never leave you. The only way for you to not feel Their love is for you to fall away. But no matter what happens, They will always be there. And you can always come back to Them through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. 

I am in no way an expert in any of this. These are just my thoughts and feelings. I know life is different for everyone, and everyone has a different relationship with God because not everyone needs the same things from Him. However, I do know that He loves us with all of His heart, and with every fiber of His being. He loves us SO MUCH, I can't even describe to you nor fathom the deepness of His love. 

Love and respect

All we can do, as human beings, is love and respect each other. The most important thing that everyone on Earth needs is love. It really shouldn't be that hard, but sometimes it is. I know–though I love most everyone, sometimes I get frustrated with people. Shocker, I know, but it's true. Sometimes people's actions frustrate me. But I have come to realize that there is NOTHING I can do about it. I can't force people to talk to me when they don't want to, I can't force people to be kind to others, I can't force people to do anything. So I just try to do my best to be myself. I do my best to be kind, and I do my best to not let other people's actions get to me. And I do my best to be as Christlike as possible. Sometimes it's hard. Sometimes it hurts, especially when people judge without knowing anything about what they are judging. But I try to remind myself that I am doing the best that I can, and that is all that I can do. And I know that (or at least, I hope that) other people are doing the best that they can do, too.

Xoxo
Mattie