There is a work to do that only you can do.

This week, I've learned a lot about the difference between what I want for me, and what God wants for me. But I've also learned a lot about how sometimes, it's entirely up to me.

I've been thinking a lot about my future plans after graduation, and how it's very up in the air. There's nothing set in stone for future job opportunities, and it's very frustrating for me haha. I feel like I'm going to pick the wrong job, the wrong city, the wrong place to live...which is poppycock. If I feel good about it, it will be fine. I guess the thing that scares me the most is there are so many options, and I don't want to make the wrong choice.

ANYWAY.

The main thing I've learned this week...is to keep praying, and trust that God will provide. Have faith that things will work out. All of this is easier said than done...but I know that things will unfold in miraculous and beautiful ways, and all of the things that God has promised me will happen in time.

I also learned something about personal revelation this week. I learned that I might be placing all of the ways that God normally speaks to me in a box...and not looking outside that box for answers. I learned that I need to open my eyes a little more.

Last week, Sister Jean B. Bingham of the General Relief Society presidency came to speak to my stake and a few others, and it was AMAZING! I am so grateful I went! She talked about so many things that I really loved. She talked about how we are often the hardest on ourselves...But Heavenly Father knows absolutely everything about us, and He loves us! He absolutely adores us and has such an amazing plan for us. He has such confidence and trust in us. He is completely and perfectly loving.

She talked about how we need to take time to enjoy the beauties of each day. There is something beautiful in every day...Even if it is just one thing. Even if it is something small.

She talked about Proverbs 3:5-6 in depth and I loved what she expounded upon.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
Trust means to rely on the integrity, strength, and ability of someone (also known as 'faith')
We have to open our heart for spiritual guidance. We don't know everything.
In all thy ways means everything. Physical, spiritual, emotional, etc.
Acknowledge Him in everything. Look for His hand, and recognize that anything we accomplish, we accomplish with His help.
He shall direct thy paths–This one really stood out to me. He allows us to learn from our decisions, and He gives us little nudges and hints that help us grow and learn, and develop. Sometimes He doesn't give us the answer outright because He trusts us to make our own decisions.

There are many roads...but only one path. The covenant path. We are stronger because of the covenants we make. I loved this point that she made and am so grateful for my decision to go through the temple last month. Every week, I am more and more grateful, and more and more sure, that that was the right decision. She said that joy is a result of keeping our covenants, and I know that this is true.

My favorite quote that she said was, "Married or not, there is a work for you to do that only you can do." There are things that only you can contribute...The Lord can use you for incredible good. The Lord uses us in many ways to bless those around us. Is there something you can do to change the life of just one? Yes, there is. And you don't have to travel thousands of miles to make a difference.

The last thing that I loved that she talked about were 4 keys to progress.

1. Trust in the Lord
2. Remember who you are
3. Act in faith
-the mistake that we often make is doing nothing. Make a choice, and then find out what you can learn from the experience.
4. Keep your covenants
-It is up to us to figure out how to use the gifts we have been given...It is up to us to figure out how to embrace and learn from our covenants.

Jesus Christ is always the answer. He is the Rock, and if we build on Him, we will not fall.

I am learning each and every day about how imperfect I am, and about how much God really wants me to return to Him. Remembering to trust Him...and actually trusting Him...is sometimes harder than it sounds. I'm not perfect at it–far from it–but the Lord knows that, and understands that, and He makes it so that I can have help. He has placed some amazing people and examples in my life. I can turn to them anytime and they will always help me when they are able. They always say exactly what I need to hear and I know that God works miracles for me through them. I hope that I can be like them in time, and be able to bless those around me.

I hope you all have a wonderful week! Remember whose you are, and that He has a plan for you! He loves you very much, and so do I.

Xoxo
Mattie

It's up to us to turn towards Him.

I was reading in Alma earlier this week and had the thought that the Lamanites and Nephites had many cycles of righteousness and wickedness, and Heavenly Father gave them many second chances. I, too, have had many cycles of righteousness and 'wickedness', and Heavenly Father has given me so many second chances. I am so thankful for that! This week has been a difficult week in several ways but I've made it and am totally pleased with my choices. Hopefully this next week will be a lot easier. I've really been blessed these past couple weeks. I don't think we realize just how much a part of our lives our Savior and Heavenly Father are. I'm so thankful for their part in my life. I'm getting ready to go to Bear Lake this summer for work and I've been super stressed about it, but the last 24-ish hours I have been on top of the ball! I have to finish making my shopping list and then go shopping tomorrow, and then I have to finish packing. I'm excited for all the fun adventures that are going to happen this summer, but I'm nervous I'm going to forget something. But I'm trying to be positive, and in control of my anxiety and depression. Some days it's hard, and I feel lost, lonely, and unloved, but I know I'm not alone, I know I'm loved, and I know that my Savior is with me, so I know I'm really not lost. He knows where I am, and I just don't know where I am yet.

There's a song by Hilary Weeks that I love. It's called "Where I Am" and it's talking about how when Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are with us, we know where we are. I'm not always sure of where I am...lately I've been feeling really lost...but I know that as long as I am trying to do the right things, and as long as I am trying to be closer to my Savior...I don't need to worry. Because if I am not going in the right direction, He'll let me know. I can count on Him to guide me in the right direction.

One of the speakers in sacrament meeting said that, "Charity is something you acquire, and make a part of you... True charity is love in action. You are the gift. Fill the hunger for human connection... More isn't always better. Sometimes it's just more." I really loved this! Charity is a way for us to connect with other people! Deep down, everyone craves connection. Charity is a way for us to help create this connection between those who need and want it...and those who can show them love. The last thing that she said was that more isn't always better. I loved that. Sometimes, we go out of our way and over the top to show someone we love them, or to help someone in need...but sometimes all they need is someone to listen. Sometimes all they need is someone to watch their kids. Sometimes all they need is someone to tell them they are loved. Something simple, sweet, short.

I loved what the other speaker in sacrament meeting talked about. He talked about how Jesus grew. He brought up this scripture, Luke 2:52, which reads: "And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man." One thing that I noticed while he was talking about this scripture was really interesting:

• Wisdom = Mentally
• Stature = Physically
• Favour with God = Spiritually
• Favour with man = Socially

It states specifically in the scriptures that Jesus grew and increased in all of the areas that we all struggle with! At one time or another, we have all struggled (or will struggle with) at least one of these, if not all of them. And Jesus knows how we feel!! Not just because He felt our personal struggles when He atoned for us, but because He, too, experienced it for Himself! That is so amazing!! 

He also brought up the talk by Elder Massimo De Feo of the Seventy entitled "Pure Love: The True Sign of Every True Disciple of Jesus Christ", from the last General Conference. He talked about how Elder De Feo's mother was not a member of the church, and she was sick, and asked her son to teach her how to pray. Elder De Feo goes on to say, "How can someone who is in such great pain pray for someone else. She is the one in need." The answer? Pure love. His mother loved him so much that she forgot about herself. In her most critical hour, she loved him more than she loved herself. If this sounds familiar, you're correct. Someone else we know and love prayed for others while He was in great pain. Our Savior. He loved us so much that He was willing to go to great lengths to make sure that we could return to our Heavenly Father if we wanted to. Despite His pain and second thoughts, He went through it: He drank the bitter cup for us, and He died for us. All because He loved us.

Something some said today really stood out to me. He said, "Even great faith has a shelf life." I loved that. We have to make a daily effort to grow and maintain our faith. We are saplings in the gospel. We have to tend to our testimonies, our faith, our charity, our patience...all the attributes of Christ that we are trying to emulate and gain, we need to continuously tend to them. They will die if we don't nourish them.

Heavenly Father trusts us to do and be more. He really does. He's given us the tools and knowledge that we need to grow. He'll sometimes give us nudges...but ultimately, it's up to us. We have to be the ones to make the move. He will not force us to do anything we don't want to, but His arms are open, and He's knocking at our door. We just have to run to Him and let Him in.

I am so thankful for a Heavenly Father who gives me so many second chances. I am so thankful for a Savior who is always with me. I am so thankful for the opportunities I have to start over again. I don't think I deserve them, but I am grateful for them. I am so grateful that my Savior loves me and thinks that I am worth saving and redeeming. I am so thankful for supportive and loving friends and family. I don't think I could do this without them.

I am blessed to have such a loving and supportive Father in Heaven, and His Son, my Savior and Redeemer.

Well, this week is my last week at home! I'm heading up to Bear Lake on Friday for my job at a scouting camp! I'm excited! I can't wait! I'm hoping to still keep posting on my blog every week this summer, but they either will not be super long, or I will miss a couple of weeks. I hope not, but just in case, this is me letting you know.

I hope everyone has a great last week before summer officially starts! I hope everyone has a sweet Memorial Day. I'm so thankful for all those who have died while serving our country. I am grateful for their service, and I hope that I can always remember that people have died to protect the ground that I walk every day.

Everything He did, He did for us.

I love going home. I am so thankful for the Christmas season. I love my Savior and am so grateful for His birth, life, and sacrifice. I would no be where I am today without Him. I have been given so much help and strength from Him, and He has sent me people I've needed–they've either been friends I've needed, lessons I needed to learn, or they've been a source of love, help, and strength. Sometimes they've been all three. I am so grateful for them though. No matter what I learned or gained, they were what I needed at the time. I wish I could understand...I wish we could all understand why we all have to go through hard and painful things, because sometimes it feels like they will never end and that there aren't lessons to learn from them, but I know that there is a lesson. Someday, you will know the answer. I know that you are learning things from each and every experience you got through. And you are becoming a better, stronger person for it.

Merry Christmas Eve! I hope you are able to remember the reason for the season. Christmas is a time to remember the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I am so grateful for His sacrifice and His willingness to come to Earth to be born to save us all. He was born to save us, He lived to save us, and He died to save us. Everything He did, He did it for us. I am so thankful for Him. I do not know where I would be without Him, and I do not want to find out.

I am grateful for His mother, and for her willingness to give birth to Him, and to teach Him how to be kind, and considerate, and compassionate, and loving. I am so thankful for Joseph, and for his willingness to teach Him hard work, and diligence, and strength. Because through these lessons to Him, I have learned how to be this way.

I hope you have a safe and warm and happy Christmas! God bless you!

Xoxo
Mattie

He makes up the difference.

Well, I made it through last week!!! It was super tough, but I know that my Savior was helping me. :)

Today in church, the focus was on Christ. Well, it always is, but it was more of a focus on Him.

Sacrament meeting was so beautiful!! <3

Hannah talked about service as an attribute of Christ:

• God blesses us through others! I know this–countless times I have needed to hear something or I've needed someone to listen, and someone said exactly what I needed, or they asked to hear about me and my day. 
• She said that we need to let others serve us. Sometimes it's hard to let them, but we need to let them. It's hard to serve someone who won't let you serve them.
• Even small acts–they may seem insignificant–but even small acts can have a significant impact on someone's life.
• Service will help us come unto Christ, and it will help us become more like Him. <3

Batchlor talked about how to come to know and find Christ:

• We need to read the scriptures.
• We need to obey the commandments.
• Loving others makes all of the other commandments fall into place.
• We need to find comfort in the right places–we need to find comfort in the Savior and in our Heavenly Father. Only they can bring us true comfort.
• Just know that He will carry you through your trials.

Charity's talk was about our relationship with Jesus Christ. She read this absolutely beautiful letter that she was given at a youth conference, I believe, that was written to us from the perspective of our Elder Brother, the Savior. It made me cry! It was so beautiful, and just exactly what I needed to hear. 

• She said that if we don't put in the effort, the relationship won't be there. This is so true. Christ is ready and waiting–all we have to do is knock. 
• It's our responsibility to draw near to Him. We have to have a desire for the relationship. 
• He knows what is best for us, and He wants us to choose that.
• Blessings will come as we seek to develop that relationship with Christ.

Nick talked about missionary work, and coming unto Christ. He read an amazing poem that I loved, and I am going to share it with you because it spoke to me. 

It's called "After All We Can Do", by Robbie Pierce:

"I had been in that hole for a very long time—In the dark and the damp, in the cold and the slime. The shaft was above me; I saw it quite clear, but there’s no way I ever could reach it from here. I could not remember the world way up there, so I lost every hope and gave in to despair. I knew nothing but darkness, the floor, and the wall. Then from off in the distance I heard someone call: "Get up! Get ready! There’s nothing the matter! Take rocks and take sticks and build up a fine ladder!" This was a thought that had not crossed my mind, but I started to stack all the stones I could find. When I ran out of stones, then old sticks were my goal, for some way or another I’d climb from that hole. I soon had a ladder that stood very tall, and I thought, “I’ll soon leave this place once and for all!” I climbed up my ladder, a difficult chore, for from lifting those boulders, my shoulders were sore. I climbed up the ladder, but soon had to stop, for my ladder stopped short, some ten feet from the top. I went back down my ladder and felt all around, but there were no more boulders nor sticks to be found. I sat down in the darkness and started to cry. I’d done all I could do and I gave my best try. But in spite of my work, in this hole I must die. And all I could do was to sit and think, “Why?” Was my ladder to short? Was my hole much too deep? Then from way up on high came a voice: “Do not weep.” And then faith, hope, and love entered into my chest as the voice calmly told me that I’d done my best. He said, “You have worked hard, and your labor’s been rough, but the ladder you’ve built is at last tall enough. So do not despair; there is reason to hope–just climb up your ladder; I’ll throw down my rope.” I climbed up my ladder, then climbed up the cord. When I got to the top of it, there stood the Lord. I’ve never been happier; my struggle was done. I blinked in the brightness that came from the Son. I fell to the ground as His feet I did kiss. I cried, “Lord, can I ever repay Thee for this?” He looked all about. There were holes in the ground. They had people inside, and were seen all around. There were thousands of holes that were damp, dark and deep. Then the Lord looked at me, and He said, “feed my sheep." And he went on his way to save other lost souls, so I got right to work, calling down to the holes,“Get up! Get ready! There is nothing the matter! Take rocks, and take sticks, and build up a fine ladder!” It now was my calling to spread the good word–The most glorious message that man ever heard: That there’s one who is coming to save one and all, and we need to be ready when He gives the call. He’ll pull us all out of the holes that we’re in and save all our souls from cold death and from sin. So do not lose faith; there is reason to hope: Just climb up your ladder; He'll throw down His rope."

I just love that! At one point in my life, I felt like I was in this hole, and not only was my Savior there, helping me to get out, I had a beautiful friend who's been a great example to me who was helping me, too. Finishing his talk, Nick said that coming unto Christ starts by exercising a particle of faith and nourishing it.

In Relief Society, we talked about how we can live a Christ-centered life. True joy is found in living a Christ-centered life. I am so blessed to be a member of this church and have the true Gospel of Christ! I wouldn't be who I am today without my Savior, and I know that He has delivered me from many things that I couldn't do myself. I have to rely on Him every single day, because I need Him every single day. He gives me strength when I can't go on by myself anymore. He makes up the difference because He loves me, and He wants me to be able to return to live with my Heavenly Father.

One step at a time.

During the sacrament today, I was thinking about the Savior and His Atonement. I wrote a poem, kind of:

He did not have to suffer.
He did not have to die.
He could have stopped at any time,
Yet He did not.
He loves us so much He suffered.
He loves us so much He died.
So turn to Him in times of need;
He suffered and died for you.

Today in Relief Society, we talked about perfecting ourselves, and putting on the armor of God. One of the girls in my hall shared a quote by Elder Ballard, and I loved this part: "True spiritual power lies in numerous smaller acts woven together in a fabric of spiritual fortification that protects and shields from all evil." That reminds me of the scripture in 2nd Nephi, "line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little." (2nd Nephi 28:30). It's easier to take things one step at a time, especially because we are not perfect, and we make mistakes. Sometimes I think we feel like we have to be perfect right now, and that it can't wait. It doesn't always happen all at once. But if you take things slowly—one step at a time—and work with the Lord, it'll be easier. It'll still be hard, but it won't be so hard. :)

 

If I Could.

If I Could:
If I could feel my Savior's love, would I ever feel unloved?

If I could feel His arms around me, would I ever feel sad?

If I could feel His presence, would I ever feel alone?

If I could understand His grace, would I ever feel lost?

If I could understand the Atonement, would I ever feel unforgiven?

If I could understand the Plan, would I ever falter from the path?

If I could love as He did, would I ever impede my neighbors?

If I could serve as He did, would I ever leave someone in need?

If I could care as He did, would I ever ignore someone in need?

Because I have felt my Savior's love, I feel loved.

Because I have felt His arms around me, I am happy.

Because I have felt His presence, I know I'm not alone.

Though I do not fully understand His grace, I do not feel lost.

Though I do not fully understand the Atonement, I do not feel unforgiven.

Though I do not fully understand the Plan, I try not to falter from the path.

Because I try to love as He did, I love my neighbor.

Because I try to serve as He did, I serve those around me.

Because I try to care as He did, I help those in need. 

Because He loved–and because He loves–I, too, love. 

~~A poem by Me

I know He loves me. I know He is always there for me. I know that He loves and is there for you, too. And because He cannot serve us personally, He sends people to us to help us out. I love being the answer to someone's prayers, because sometimes being the answer to someone's prayer answers my prayers. Plus, I just love making people happy. :) I know that God loves it when everyone is happy, too, so I am always trying to make those that I meet happy because I know that that's what Jesus would do. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. 

Obedience.

Sister Nielson talked about obedience in Relief Society today, and I thought this quote was perfect!! "When we love the Lord, obedience ceases to be a burden. Obedience becomes a delight." (Joseph B. Wirthlin) I love this!! As you come closer to the Lord, and love Him, obeying Him becomes a delight. You want to obey Him; you know that it is right and true. Obeying Him makes you happier, and it makes you stronger. <3

We are all on our own personal trail of hope. Heavenly Father will send us blessings, angels, and comfort to give us strength as we go through difficult trials. Obedience to the commandments keeps us safe and enables us to reach our full potential. The commandments are loving guidance from our Heavenly Father and are a road map that can lead us home. Sister Nielson gave us this quote:

"Obedience to God can be the very highest expression of independence. Just think of giving to Him the one thing, the one gift, that He would never take...Obedience–that which God will never take by force–He will accept when freely given. And He will then return to you freedom that you can hardly dream of–the freedom to feel, and to know, the freedom to do, and the freedom to BE, at least a thousand fold more than we offer Him. Strangely enough, the key to freedom is OBEDIENCE."

I know that when we obey Heavenly Father's commandments, He blesses us. It may not always be right away, and it may not be in the way we expected, but He will always bless us. I know that He sends us angels to comfort us–He can send us people, or He can send us literal angels, and He can send us angels in other forms, such as the form of music. I know that we are never alone, and I know that He loves us. I know He is always with us, and I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ amen.

Inspiration and the Holy Ghost.

The Lord knows how to guide us and teach us through the Spirit. The Spirit can help us in ways that man-made remedies can not. I was really nervous about speaking in Sacrament meeting today–my heart was beating out of my chest–so I prayed and instantly received the thought, "Be still and know that I am God", and my heart stopped pounding. I was still nervous, but my body was at peace, and that made it easier to speak. So, here's my talk:

“The Holy Ghost can do for us physically, emotionally, mentally, and intellectually what no man-made remedy can begin to duplicate.” I was asked to speak on inspiration and the Holy Ghost, and I feel like this quote encompasses both in a way that I’ve never thought of before. While I was searching through talks I came upon Sister Linda K. Burton’s talk entitled “Tuning Our Hearts to the Voice of the Spirit”. In her talk, she asked this question: “Why does discerning the whisperings of the Spirit seem so difficult?” and then goes on to say, “Perhaps one reason is that the Spirit communicates both to our minds and to our hearts…we sometimes confuse our own thoughts and our own emotions with the promptings of the Spirit. Another reason is that discerning the Spirit is a gift of the Spirit. Just as learning a language comes easily to some and not to others, so does the ability to understand the whisperings of the Spirit. Most often, learning an instrument or language takes a great deal of effort, including practicing and sometimes making mistakes. So it is with…learning the language of the Spirit.”

One of our scripture mastery scriptures in seminary is Doctrine and Covenants 8:2-3, and it says, “Behold, I will tell you in your mind and in your heart, by the Holy Ghost, which shall come upon you and which shall dwell in your heart”. The Lord will give us inspiration from the Holy Ghost in our mind and heart. How many of us have difficulties discerning the Spirit from our own thoughts, though? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. In the Bible Dictionary, it says that the Holy Ghost “gives one a testimony of Jesus Christ and of his work an the work of his servants upon the earth.” So how exactly can we receive inspiration from the Holy Ghost? Well, in his talk entitled “How to Obtain Revelation and Inspiration for Your Personal Life”, Elder Richard G. Scott says that, “The Holy Ghost communicates important information that we need to guide us in our mortal journey. When it is crisp and clear and essential, it warrants the title of revelation. When it is a series of promptings we often have to guide us step by step to a worthy objective, for the purpose of this message, it is inspiration.” I found this interesting, because I had never really thought about the difference between revelation and inspiration, and he said it perfectly: “when it is crisp and clear and essential, it warrants the title of revelation. When it is a series of promptings…it is inspiration.” Inspiration is given through promptings from the Holy Ghost because Heavenly Father needs you to do to help His children. He says that emotions such as anger, or defensiveness “will drive away the Holy Ghost”, so we need to get rid of those emotions, and have emotions such as happiness and peace in order to receive revelation or inspiration. “Careful quiet speech will favor the receipt of revelation”. He says that he fasts and prays to find and understand scriptures that will help him. He ponders what the scriptures means, and he prays. He said that “spiritual communication can be enhanced by good practices. Exercise, reasonable amounts of sleep, and good eating habits increase our capacity to receive and understand revelation.” It is easier for the Lord to speak to us when we are healthy and rested.

In her talk, Sister Burton had a list of things that we can do to feel and learn how the Spirit talks to us. One thing we can do is to pray humbly and sincerely. Heavenly Father wants us to know that He is there. He wants us to trust Him. She says that “To pray sincerely means we intend to act on the answer we receive.” When we are searching for the right thing to do, we need to be prepared to do what God will ask us to do. Another thing she said we could do was to act promptly on spiritual impressions. We all know the story of when President Monson was Bishop and received a prompting to go visit the veteran’s hospital several times, but he didn't leave until after the stake president had spoken and it was too late; the man had already died. “Never postpone a prompting.”
Elder Bruce R. McConkie said in a talk entitled “Agency or Inspiration” that “We’re faced with two propositions. One is that we ought to be guided by the spirit of inspiration, the spirit of revelation. The other is that we’re here…to use our agency…and we need to establish an intricate balance between these two”. When we search for an answer, or for inspiration, we need to do all we can to look for an answer; we shouldn’t just ask God, and then let it be. We need to search for an answer. We need to study our scriptures, pray, and read the words of the prophets. God will give us our answer only when He knows that we are ready and prepared for it. When we have done all that we can, He will give us our answer. He said, “The Lord has all wisdom, all knowledge, and all power; he knows how to govern and control and direct us in a perfect manner. He lets us determine what we should do, but he expects us to counsel with him.” He also expects us to search for the answer ourselves.

I know that our Heavenly Father sends us inspiration through the Holy Ghost. I know that in order to recognize the Spirit, we have to search, and pray, and prepare ourselves for answers, but when we are ready, He will send us inspiration and revelation. I know that Heavenly Father loves us and that He wants us to become more like Him. I know that He will not leave us alone, nor will He leave us unprepared. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ amen.