Faith can overcome fear.

Today was GREAT! I had an awesome thought during Gospel Doctrine that I'll share in a moment.

First, some thoughts I had during the sacrament.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about people and feelings (not sure why; it just happened). Sometimes we might offend someone by what we say or do, and sometimes we are offended by others. But there is no way that those who offended will know unless you tell them. Sort of going off of that, I read an article the other week that said something to the effect of, "you don't always have to forgive someone to bring you peace. If being angry at them makes you feel good, that's okay." And I remember thinking, "Well, that seems counterproductive." For me, I personally hate being angry/annoyed with someone for a long period of time. Sure, sometimes it feels good to be mad at them, and to not forgive them. But after awhile, there comes a point when the anger or annoyance starts to affect other parts of my life–and not in a good way. Yes, sometimes there are cases where extreme anger or frustration towards someone is warranted, but if you are always angry at them, they've won–maybe again. You are still thinking about them. Their actions still cause you anger and hurt. In forgiving them, though, you win. You've become the bigger person, and you can be at peace. Now, in no way at all am I saying that by forgiving them you approve of their actions. Not at all! But by forgiving them, you can let go of the hurt and pain that they caused you and you can finally begin to heal. Holding on to things for a long time isn't always the best cause of action. Sometimes you have to let go. If you feel like there is no possible way that you could forgive them (because it was too awful), that's okay, too. But don't hold on to it any longer than you have to. Just let it go.

 A couple of things stood out to me in sacrament meeting today:
-Obedience isn't black and white. It's greyscale.
-Sometimes obedience is selfish–we obey not because Heavenly Father wants us to, but because we gain something, like social acceptance or something.
-Sometimes Jesus lets us struggle through challenges in order to help us strengthen our faith in Him.
-Faith can overcome fear.
-Asking for help is the ultimate sign of faith and humility.

In Gospel Doctrine, I had an awesome thought. We were talking about the fulfillment of Samuel the Lamanite's prophecies about Jesus Christ. And we were reading in 3 Nephi 10, where Jesus Christ says, "How oft have I gathered thee as a hen gathereth her chicks?" And someone said that when a hen puts up her wings, the chicks can run underneath her wings, and sometimes she dies protecting her chicks. Immediately I had a thought about the analogy: Jesus is the hen. And when He was up on the cross, His arms were raised up, and He died for us. He invites us to come unto Him always, and His hands are always stretched out towards us. So of course I shared that thought in class (except the italics; that part I only thought of as I was recalling the story to transcribe it to you, dear Reader) and then wanted to share it here because I loved the imagery in that analogy and I'd never thought of that before.

Today was fifth Sunday, so we were combined (in two rooms, I think). Bishop talked about some things before the actual lesson. He said that sometimes challenges in life can help us in our lives. I loved that. Sometimes challenges in our lives help us become who we were meant to be.

The lesson today was on keeping the Sabbath Day holy. He shared four questions that we can ask ourselves (there are many others) to try and decide if we're keeping the Sabbath Day holy.
1. Is my action hold or of service to God?
2. Is it doing good?
3. Does it keep me unspotted from the world?
4. Is it honoring the Lord, or am I selfishly following my own desires?

After that, Sister Anderson spoke to us for a little bit. She talked about the new Thanksgiving Garden statues exhibit, about two of them specifically. The one that depicted the story of the woman who was found in adultery, and the one that depicted Jesus Christ carrying His cross up to Calvary. For the first one, she said that Christ was brought here to love us and save us. Not to condemn us. For the second one, she said that He is here to help us through and to love us. She said that we are going to have to fight and sacrifice to keep our testimonies. I know that is so true. You have to hold on to your faith and testimony. Hold on to what you know to be true. Just hold on.

I'm so grateful for a Savior who knows me, and loves me, and sacrificed His life so that I could return to live with my Heavenly Parents. I am so thankful for the sweet spirit that is in my ward; I love the people in my ward so much and I am always learning things from them. I'm so thankful for the Spirit, and for His love and direction to guide the right answers and actions into my life and for His guidance to me to be able to share with those around me. This has been a crazy couple of weeks and sometimes I was super worried and scared that things wouldn't work out, but they did. I'm lucky to have had my Savior with me to help me get through it. I'm grateful for the opportunities I've had to be Christ's hands this past week and I look forward to the opportunities I will have this upcoming week. Stay safe and remember you're so loved! <3

Xoxo
Mattie

He answers you in unexpected ways.

Loved today's lessons. Not quite what I was looking for but they were still great. :)

My thoughts during the sacrament today were short but sweet:

I've had much better luck reading my scriptures and praying this week. Still not 100% perfect but I'm working on it. :) I am so grateful for my Savior and for His love and grace. This past week was weird and started off okay (I think...I don't remember) but didn't end quite as well. I hope that I will find answers today as to why things happened/didn't happened. 

I was looking for answers but didn't exactly get the answers I was expecting. I did get answers today but just not what I thought I would get or that I wanted.

The topic in sacrament meeting today was conversion, which is a great topic and I learned some new things.
-We need our Savior to change. We can only do so much by ourselves; we can't fully change in the way that our Heavenly Father knows we can without our Savior. 
-You have to be born again/converted in order to inherit the kingdom of God.
Three things in order to have personal conversion:
-Listen (to the prophets, Holy Ghost, personal revelation, etc.)
-Commit (commitment is often a mental process)
-Do (what's a commitment if we don't act?)
-As we're converted we'll find ourselves doubting less.
-What is your attitude through trials? Do you try to rely on the Lord, or do you complain that you have to go through it?
-Yield your heart to Him daily. Conversion is a daily lifetime commitment.

We talked about baptism in Gospel Principles today. Someone said something interesting that I'd never thought about before. We were talking about one of the reasons for baptism is for a remission of sins. Someone said that when she thinks about remission, she thinks about cancer remission, and how that means it (the cancer) may come back. And you need to take care of yourself. And the same is for the remission of sins–they may come back so take care of yourself. Keep trying. You can get better over time. Another interesting thing that I suppose I should have figured out by myself was that strait (as in the strait and narrow) doesn't mean "straight". It means like rigorous, an uphill battle. It will not be easy. But it will be worth it.

In Relief Society we talked about the doctrine of Christ. Which is:
-Faith in Christ and His Atonement
-Repentance
-Baptism and the sacrament
-Gift of the Holy Ghost
-Enduring to the end
A couple of things that stood out to me today were:
-repentance is a daily process. And we can't expect more for ourselves than He does.
-if we recognize following the doctrine of Christ is the only way, we will be more inclined to do so.

I definitely wasn't looking for answers in any of the topics covered today, but I found some anyway. Funny how that works. I received an answer more in the way I was looking for yesterday but I wanted more of a confirmation in that way today but I got a different answer instead. I'm blessed to have a loving Heavenly Father who knows what I need to hear, even when I was looking for something else. I'm looking forward to my scripture study and prayers this week, as well as trying to find peace. I'm grateful for my friends and family and for their love and support. Life just isn't as sweet without them, and I'm grateful to love and be loved by so many.

Xoxo
Mattie

Have faith and step into the darkness.

Loved everything about the lessons today.

So my thoughts during the sacrament today were a little scatterbrained but that's because it was a crazy week last week and I'm still on a high from meeting Peter Hollens (!!!) last night. So I apologize for that but I did say some good things:

Personally, this past week was insane for a number of reasons *cough* midterms *cough* but I was able to get through it! Eventually. The week started on a low note and as the week went on I swore it was just getting lower and lower, but it did end on a super high note: we won our football game Friday night and then I was able to go to the BYU Spectacular Saturday night with my friend! I had such a blast and got to meet Peter Hollens (definitely a highlight). I am so grateful for the hand of my Savior this week. Many times I just wanted to quit and give up because I thought I couldn't do it or I didn't want to do it. But I persevered and was able to do everything  I needed to this week (admittedly some things had less than pleasant outcomes but that is okay) and then I was blessed with a great weekend. There are some things that I have been working on for a while that I am getting better at, and slowly and surely it's working. I need to focus harder, however, because even though I'm working on them, I could still be working harder. That's my goal this week, and I am so glad I have my Savior to help me. <3

Sacrament meeting was really great today. And it didn't fly by like it normally does. It went slowly and took some time, which was great because I needed to focus today. Today the main message of sacrament meeting was temples and coming unto to Christ. Here is a collection of some of the thoughts that stood out to me:
-God gives us second chances and do-overs because He loves us.
-Do you know His (Christ's) voice? Will you drop everything and come unto Him?
-Learn about Him; come to know Him by reading the scriptures.
-It doesn't matter how far off the path you are, you can always come back, and you will be blessed just for trying.
-One way to come unto Christ is through temple worship.
-Put your trust in Him.
-As we stop fighting against the Lord and try our best, He will make up the difference.
-We come unto Christ by trying and trying again.

In Gospel Doctrine Johanna shared a quote from C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters which I have been meaning to read for awhile now but just haven't gotten around to it yet. Anyway, the quote was, "It is funny how mortals always picture us as putting things into their minds; in reality our best work is done by keeping things out." We talked about how Satan often tries just to keep us busy enough so that we don't have time for scripture study and prayer–sins of omission instead of commission. We were in Helaman 13-15 today, and the story is the story of Samuel the Lamanite. We talked about how opposition is required in order to be able to tell the difference between right and wrong. We also talked about how God wants to save us! He loves us. God loves broken things because He is the only one who can fix them, and so He wants us to come to Him because He can fix us. That reminded me of a song by Kenneth Cope, found here. It's a good song. It talks about how God loves broken things, including us. God chastens those He loves because He wants us to grow and become better; much like when a parent chastens their child, they are only doing it for their good. One other thing that was mentioned was the fact that Satan is trying to do something with us, but God is trying to make something of us.

In Relief Society we talked about faith and testimony. There were three main things that were mentioned:
1. Through faith we can find God and know that He lives.
-Our greatest quest in this life is a search for God, and our purpose in this life is to grow our faith.
2. We must believe in order to see.
-Faith is the step in the darkness before the light.
-"In order to find God as a reality, we must follow the course which he pointed out for the quest."
-Faith is a process, and it oscillates. Sometimes we have more faith and sometimes we have less.
-We can't wait until the result; that's not how faith works.
3. Acting on faith leads to personal testimony.
-Heavenly Father will take care of me (I loved this! One of the girls said that she just said this one time and it is so true. I don't know all things but I don't have to worry too much because Heavenly Father will make sure I'm taken care of).
-Hold to the rod; don't hold onto the world, but make time for Christ.
-God knows you. Have faith and step into the darkness.

Loved the messages shared today! I also had the opportunity to be set apart today and heard some things that I needed a reminder of. I'm looking forward to trying to be better about certain things in these upcoming weeks. I know that if I turn to my Savior He'll help me. I'm not alone, and I am capable of so much more than I think I am. I am so grateful for my Savior and my Heavenly Father. They do so much for me, and help me so much. I would not be who or where I am today without Them. I have had many times in my life where I haven't known what will happen or where I will be going but I have stepped into the unknown in faith and it has lead me to be who I am today. I would not change who I am for the world.

I hope that we can all come to accept those around us and accept the differences between us. This world is changing in many ways but I hope that the innate human nature to be kind will always be around in people like me and my friends.

Xoxo
Mattie

Do everything in your power to do your part.

Today was our Stake Conference, which was great. I heard many things I needed/wanted to hear.

One thing that was so funny was one of the speakers (one of the Stake Presidency I believe, but I could be wrong) was talking about how he wanted to get a smokin' body and he said he told that to his wife who said, "Sweetheart, the only way you'll get a smokin' body is if you're cremated" and the whole congregation laughed and went "Ohh" as in "Ohh, burn." It was so funny!

Anyway.

Many awesome things were said today that I LOVED!
So, this talk was about marriage:
-Stop trying to find perfection.
-Do everything in your power to do your part.
-We cannot sit in our apartments or wherever and expect the Lord to bring them to us.
-Heavenly Father knows you and loves you. If you do your part He will direct you.

This talk was about building your foundation and faith in Christ:
-Build your foundation upon Christ.
-Go to Heavenly Father with a teachable heart (specifically when you go to Him with questions but also just always).
-Learn of the Savior–through study and prayer.
-You are engraven upon His palms. <3

-You are loved by Heavenly Father and are precious to Him.
-A testimony is not found over a pulpit, it is shared over a pulpit. It should be found in our own sacred places and in our own lives.
-Christ is the answer.
-Trust in the promise of the Lord.
-God is there. He will never leave you alone.

This talk was about finding Christ through gospel service:
-Matthew 16:24-25. Feed His sheep.
-Peace comes when we take up our cross and serve those around us, as He did.
This I thought was interesting: Anxiety is not an attribute of Christ. With anxiety, we are focused on ourself. Focus on those around you. With that, I know that it is hard. But I also know that when I focus on others, and serve and love them, I really do lose myself and I am not so anxious. I also know that with school, it's so hard to not be anxious about homework assignments and things, BUT some things you just have to let go and go about one day at a time. I know it's hard, but with your Savior, you can do it. :)

This talk was about conversion:
-There is joy when you stop doing what you want to do and start doing what Christ wants you to do.
-Turn and align yourself with God.

-2 Nephi 26:22
-We think we know best and we are not willing to follow the counsel of the Lord.
-Beware of pride.
-We need to be watchful in our lives. Don't let flaxen threads become flaxen cords.

-You are not here by chance. There is a reason you are here. 
-You are prepared to be here. You are among noble and great ones.
-The Lord loves you and is aware of you. Study your patriarchal blessing.

THIS TALK WAS SO CUTE, IT WAS MY FAVORITE!! It was Brother and Sister Childs, who are an older couple who were SO CUTE!!! It was adorable, and my friends and I were all like, "Relationship goals":
-Don't criticize your husband.
-Always keep God in your life.
I loved this: There's somebody out there for you. This is something that I always am thinking about; is there someone out there for me? And hearing it from Sister Childs was a blessing. She's such a sweet lady; I hope to be able to meet her someday. 

President Acerson said that "your value to Him does not change" and I loved that! It's a nice reminder that He will love you always.

Today was a great day full of inspiring messages. I'm blessed to be in such a great stake and ward. So excited to grow as a person this year!

I know that God loves you. He wants to help you return to Him. He sends you who you need when you need them. And He knows you SO WELL, I promise. He knows you. He knows exactly what you need. He loves you and wants to help you grow. So study your scriptures. Say your prayers. Turn to Him always. He is there, and He will help you. I know that you are never alone, and I know that you can always turn to your Heavenly Father and to your Savior. I am so grateful for them. This has been a crazy semester so far and it's only going to get worse but I have been able to keep up with all my projects and homework, for the most part. So blessed to have such a great apartment and friend group. I'm so thankful for my Savior and for His hand in my life. Here's to a great week for everyone!

Xoxo
Mattie

Things are going to get better.

This weekend was General Conference weekend!!!!

So happy to have been able to watch conference this weekend with my friends and roommates! It was a great weekend full of great messages! I am so grateful for our prophet, President Monson, and for his counselors, and for the quorum of the twelve apostles. I heard a lot of things this weekend that I needed to hear. There were a lot of repeats of "God loves you" and "He knows you" and I feel like those were specifically directed to me because I've been struggling a little bit with a couple of things and I just needed that reminder that He knows me and loves me and that I am not forgotten by Him. Other reminders that I needed were ones of "have faith" and remember to study and pray. I'm working on that one. :)

Also. Totally random. Just saw this on Facebook (and I shared it but I feel like this should be seen every week at least) and wanted to share. Sometimes we have rough times. Sometimes things don't go how we planned. Sometimes we think we want one thing and we end up wanting something else. Sometimes we feel alone and lost. But it's okay. We all feel like this sometimes. And guess what? That's okay. You're normal, and you're not alone. You're a wonderful person who is smart, strong, confident, loved, wanted, needed, and has so much going for them. Remember that things are going to get better, and that you can do it. You've gotten through all your hard days before. This one is no different. <3