Don't worry about it.

So I was listening to/singing the hymn "Lead Kindly Light" today and I came to the realization that the song is about Jesus Christ, seeing as He is the Light of the World. I don't know why I never realized it before. But I thought that was an awesome thing to notice today. :)
I've been thinking lately about a lot of things, and one of those is that I'm not doing enough. Sure, I'm doing a lot, and it's fine, but I'm not doing enough. And I can do better. I can be better. I might be struggling or in a hard spot right not, but I can do more. I can pray for guidance and assistance, and I can focus better, and try harder. Honestly sometimes I don't want to try or do anything, but I can. I have, and I will again. Sometimes life is hard and goes unplanned, or against your plans and wishes, but if you trust in God, and have faith, everything will be all right, and you will be blessed. 

I got a new calling today! I am the assistant ward choir director and I am super grateful and excited! I'm also grateful for my Bishop, who was inspired to bless me with what I needed to hear when he was setting me apart.

Church was SO amazing today. :)

Here's some of my favorite things from Sunday School today:
-Even though things can be hard here (on Earth), coming here (Earth) can make things better for us in the end.
-Knowing where we come from gives us purpose.
-It's God's plan for us to act, and to do what He wants/needs us to do.
-The Lord still has a plan for us that works around Satan's! Heavenly Father works with you as things change.

Relief Society was so amazing today! I'm going to miss Candace but am so excited for her to move forward with life!
-Strive to go to the temple. Do what you need to be able to go, and even if you can't, you will be blessed.
-Holiness is in striving and the struggle to keep the commandments.
-Anything worth having is hard to get.
-Holiness is making the choices that will keep the Holy Ghost in our life.
-You can make things holy by the attitude you have as you go about doing them.
-Jesus Christ is the center of holiness, of happiness. He sees us as His daughters and He loves us.
-Through His atonement, I can be redeemed, born again, changed, and righteous.

We went to the temple today to just walk around and ponder, and it was so peaceful! All my anxieties about my struggles melted away. I had all these questions, about why I've been struggling, why am I struggling, how could I fix it, and I couldn't find an answer in the scriptures, so I just sat there, and listened and felt the breeze brush past me, and listened to the birds singing. And I had this thought. "Don't worry." I was like, "What? But I have so many things that I am struggling with and need help to work on." Again, "Don't worry about it." So then I got up, headed down the path down to the front and there was this point where I just stopped, and I turned to look at the temple. It was so pretty. And I closed my eyes for a second, and this thought passed through my mind, "Thine adversity shall be but a small moment." And then I smiled and opened my eyes and walked down to where we were meeting to close. That was such a comforting thought and I needed it.

So grateful for the messages today! I'm so grateful for the Spirit that I've felt and for the promptings that I received. I'm also grateful for the little tender mercy that happened as we were walking to the car back from the temple. This guy pulled up in his car, kind of blasting his music, but not really. Anyway, the song was "See You Again". Which was my graduation song two years ago today. And I don't know why but I needed that, and thinking about it now, that moment helped me remember who I am. Where I've come from. How far I've come. Where I've been. Where I am now. How I'm changing. How I'm wanting to change. How I'm trying. And that reminds me of my blessing today. How God sees me. He sees my efforts. He sees my struggles, and He is so proud of me. He is proud of who I am. How far I've come. How hard I try. How much I love and care. And how much He loves me.

Kiera played "Savior, Redeemer of My Soul" in the car on the way home. I love that song so much and am so grateful for its message! Especially today. It's so amazing–I have a Savior, who loves me. Cares for me. Died for me. And every day He is there for me. He is my Savior. My Redeemer. I wouldn't be who I am today without Him. What a blessing it is for me to have Him with me always. And what a blessing He is to me.  ❤️❤️

Xoxo
Mattie

There are so many out there who need you.

What a weekend it's been!! It's been a good weekend but because I've been little off/not myself lately, this weekend was also a little hard and a little bit of a struggle. But God know what He's doing and He gave me the BEST roommates for the summer, and that's been such a blessing. They've helped me a lot this weekend and I know that they'll help me more as the summer goes on. Saturday afternoon was probably the most difficult time, but I went to Kristin Chenoweth's concert at the de Jong hall last night and it was FANTABULOUS and made up for the whole day; I couldn't stop smiling when I was walking home. That is, it did make up for the whole day until I got home and saw that one of my roommates had decorated my wall with things about me and had written me a card, and so together those things made my day one thousand percent better. I'm so blessed to have them in my life, and I'm so grateful for my Heavenly Father and my Savior. I've got the best support system and I know that they love me and will always be there for me.

I heard a LOT of things that I needed to hear today, so I'm just going to share my favorites from each meeting:
Sacrament Meeting:
-Press forward. We are to endure. We need to allow our journey to shape us.
-Oh this was my favorite. So in Matthew 5:48 it says, "Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which in heaven is perfect." And in 3 Nephi 12: 48 it says, "Therefore I would that ye should be perfect even as I, or your Father who is in heaven is perfect." And I loved what Cheyenne said about it. She suggested that "being perfect" means "being FINISHED" ( i.e. completing our mortal mission on this life) because in 3 Nephi Jesus added that we should be perfect even as He is, and this is after He's been resurrected.

Gospel Doctrine:
-You need to prepare your heart to go to the temple.
-The Lord will bless you when you are ready.
-Be worthy to be there.

Relief Society:
So the lesson was entitled "Nurturing the Eternal Partnership of Marriage". Which is funny, living in a singles' ward. BUT Clarissa took the perfect spin on the lesson and it was something that I SO needed to hear, so I'm grateful for her and her special way of approaching this topic. Relief Society was absolutely perfect, and I needed it, and I'd like to thank Clarissa so much for the lesson! 

-"Because you do not happen to be married does not make you essentially different from others. All of us are very much alike in appearance and emotional responses, in our capacity to think, to reason, to be miserable, to be happy, to love and be loved." ~President Hinckley
-We still have worth. We are still valued.
-"You are just as important as any others in the scheme of our Father in Heaven, and under His mercy no blessing to which you otherwise might be entitled will forever be withheld from you."
Someone said later, "The blessings aren't being held back; you're just not there yet."
-Living a righteous life will make you happy. You have to find your happiness now. Someone else said that getting married won't fix any problems, and by itself it won't make you happy. You have to find your happiness outside of any other person.
-What we do does matter, and we can make a difference in the world.
"Do not feel that because you are single, God has forsaken you. The world needs you. The Church needs you."
-The experiences that we're having now are building us up.
-"There are so many out there who need you... Keep you spiritual batteries at full charge and light the lamps of others."

I'm so grateful for the lesson, and for the words of President Hinckley and all of the women in Relief Society today. It was perfect and just what I needed to hear. I'm needed and I can make a difference in this world. I'm still loved.

Sometimes it amazes me how well God knows me and knows what I need. Like, most of the time I don't even know what I need or want! But God is all-knowing, and He made me, and He loves me, and He knows who I am going to be, and He knows how to take me there. He also knows what I need to hear, and when, and who I need to hear it from.

I went hospital singing again today and it was SUCH a blessing! I love singing with my friends and bringing the Spirit to those in the hospital on Sundays. It might be a day when they were feeling lonely or when they were feeling sad. Every time, though, it puts a smile on their face, and more often than not, tears to their eyes, and I can just feel God's love for them so strongly! He truly does love us, and care for us, and He knows what we need, every day.

Xoxo
Mattie

Happy Mother's Day! 💕

Happy Mother's Day!!! To my mom and to all of the moms in my life. I love you all and look up to you! There is no one better in this world than mothers. 💕💕💕

My mom is amazing and does so much for me and my family. She's Superwoman and Wonder Woman rolled into one awesome being and I am so grateful for her. 💕💕

I'm so grateful for all of the mothers in my life. My grandmas are amazing women, as are all of my aunts, and I have so many friends who are mothers that I love and appreciate. 💕💕

You have all taught me so many things, and I couldn't be more grateful. There are no words to describe my love and admiration for you–there are songs that come close but it's not enough. Here's a Mother's Day playlist that was shared by Paul Cardall, the pianist. It's got a lot of great songs (my favorite is "A Mother's Prayer" by Celine Dion, though there are a few that are close runners up such as "Angels", "You Raise Me Up", "Meanwhile Back at Mama's", and "Mama's Song") but it's missing this one, which is my favorite of all time. 💕💕

Also this video by the Church is SO amazing! 💕💕

I know that there are some who've loved and lost babies and I just wanted those women specifically to know that I love you and I am so grateful for you! I know it is so hard but I wanted you to know that I admire you and love you and am grateful (and proud of you) for the strength that you show every day, and I'm grateful for the love that you give to me. You're a mom to me. 💕💕

Thought I'd write this little poem to show just a snippet of all the things that moms do–for me, for their own children, and for everyone. Mothers are special beings that God put in our lives because He knew we'd need some sort of guidance and love in our lives, and for that, He gave us moms. I thank my Heavenly Father every day for my mom and for all moms. 💕💕

"Thank You Mothers" by Mattie  

Thank you for loving me,
for teaching me,
for listening to me. 

Thank you for trying,
for sharing,
for caring. 

Thank you for watching,
for leading,
for coaching. 

Thank you for helping,
for respecting,
for guiding. 

Without you, I'd be lost,
I'd be alone,
I'd be sad. 

Thank you, mothers, for being there, for loving me, and for showing me how to be a mom. 💕💕

He brings peace and He sends love.

It's been quite a week! I now have two roommates–they're both FANTASTIC and I love them! My religion class this term is going to be so good, but a little crazy. I think it will be a really good class though. :)

My thoughts during the sacrament were pretty concise today.

"Making improvements." That's something that Rosie said in the opening prayer today, and I loved it. The sacrament is a time to reflect on the past, and focus on making improvements in the future. None of us are perfect, and we all make mistakes, but with the Lord's help, and the atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ, we can work on it. We can become better day by day. And sometimes we might falter, and take a step or two backwards, but we can always get up and try again. We can always overcome. It takes time, and effort, but we can overcome, because the help of Him who overcame it ALL–Jesus Christ, our Savior and Redeemer. He brings peace and comfort to those who need it, and He sends love and forgiveness to those who ask.

 Today was fast and testimony meeting, and it was so good! Some of my favorite insights today were:

• We need to be humble enough to ask Him. 
• Compare yourself to yourself.
• Just be proactive.
• We are doing our best, and that is enough.
• Christ has suffered everything to help us.
• Sometimes things require a lot of time and patience. He won't leave us hanging.
• When we have an eternal perspective, and the end in mind, we can get past the trials; past the hard times.
• He is there and He is listening. He died and was resurrected for us. Each of us. 

Gospel Doctrine was really great today :)

• We are blessed in all things if we obey.
• When we keep the commandments we have an outpouring of the Spirit.
• God can take our small offering and make it more, make it better. He takes what we give and improves it.
• It's our duty to choose God in all things. Hold on to Christ.

Relief Society was so wonderful! The lesson was based off of President Eyring's talk from the April 2017 Women's Session of General Conference entitled "My Peace I Leave with You". It was such a great lesson! Here are some of my favorite thoughts:

• We receive peace in His way. Not the world's way.
• We can find true peace through Christ.
• Remember. Remember past experiences, past confirmations of your testimony and the gospel. Remember. They will help you in times of trial.
• Rosie said something awesome–she said that sometimes we have times of goodness–that's adding to our testimony and life–in order to prepare us for times of trial and struggle.
• God needs us to be humble, and sometimes He won't take away our trials because it is supposed to help us be humble.

Today was a great day at church. I learned some things I needed to hear, or was reminded of things in a different way. I loved getting to hang out with my new roommates:) I am so excited for this summer! We have a lot of new people in the ward and I am excited to get to know them.

I am so grateful for my Savior. I honestly was really worried and stressed about this summer, and my new roommates, and being away from home for a whole summer (and then some), but He answered my prayers. I am SO EXCITED for this summer now!! I have some pretty amazing new roommates, and I have some summer plans and I think it's going to be an awesome summer!! I've also been a little stressed about my major–fun fact, I am going to be changing it again, I think, but this time I don't have to apply for it! Which, honestly, is such a blessing and just what I need right now. 

Sometimes God waits a little bit to answer us, and sometimes the way that He answers us isn't entirely the way we expected, but I know that He answers us. I know that sometimes things don't go the way that we planned them to, but I know that it's all going to work out. I know that He brings you peace and sends you love when you want it and need it. I hope you have a wonderful Sabbath day and an amazing week! :)

Xoxo

Mattie