There is a work to do that only you can do.

This week, I've learned a lot about the difference between what I want for me, and what God wants for me. But I've also learned a lot about how sometimes, it's entirely up to me.

I've been thinking a lot about my future plans after graduation, and how it's very up in the air. There's nothing set in stone for future job opportunities, and it's very frustrating for me haha. I feel like I'm going to pick the wrong job, the wrong city, the wrong place to live...which is poppycock. If I feel good about it, it will be fine. I guess the thing that scares me the most is there are so many options, and I don't want to make the wrong choice.

ANYWAY.

The main thing I've learned this week...is to keep praying, and trust that God will provide. Have faith that things will work out. All of this is easier said than done...but I know that things will unfold in miraculous and beautiful ways, and all of the things that God has promised me will happen in time.

I also learned something about personal revelation this week. I learned that I might be placing all of the ways that God normally speaks to me in a box...and not looking outside that box for answers. I learned that I need to open my eyes a little more.

Last week, Sister Jean B. Bingham of the General Relief Society presidency came to speak to my stake and a few others, and it was AMAZING! I am so grateful I went! She talked about so many things that I really loved. She talked about how we are often the hardest on ourselves...But Heavenly Father knows absolutely everything about us, and He loves us! He absolutely adores us and has such an amazing plan for us. He has such confidence and trust in us. He is completely and perfectly loving.

She talked about how we need to take time to enjoy the beauties of each day. There is something beautiful in every day...Even if it is just one thing. Even if it is something small.

She talked about Proverbs 3:5-6 in depth and I loved what she expounded upon.
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
Trust means to rely on the integrity, strength, and ability of someone (also known as 'faith')
We have to open our heart for spiritual guidance. We don't know everything.
In all thy ways means everything. Physical, spiritual, emotional, etc.
Acknowledge Him in everything. Look for His hand, and recognize that anything we accomplish, we accomplish with His help.
He shall direct thy paths–This one really stood out to me. He allows us to learn from our decisions, and He gives us little nudges and hints that help us grow and learn, and develop. Sometimes He doesn't give us the answer outright because He trusts us to make our own decisions.

There are many roads...but only one path. The covenant path. We are stronger because of the covenants we make. I loved this point that she made and am so grateful for my decision to go through the temple last month. Every week, I am more and more grateful, and more and more sure, that that was the right decision. She said that joy is a result of keeping our covenants, and I know that this is true.

My favorite quote that she said was, "Married or not, there is a work for you to do that only you can do." There are things that only you can contribute...The Lord can use you for incredible good. The Lord uses us in many ways to bless those around us. Is there something you can do to change the life of just one? Yes, there is. And you don't have to travel thousands of miles to make a difference.

The last thing that I loved that she talked about were 4 keys to progress.

1. Trust in the Lord
2. Remember who you are
3. Act in faith
-the mistake that we often make is doing nothing. Make a choice, and then find out what you can learn from the experience.
4. Keep your covenants
-It is up to us to figure out how to use the gifts we have been given...It is up to us to figure out how to embrace and learn from our covenants.

Jesus Christ is always the answer. He is the Rock, and if we build on Him, we will not fall.

I am learning each and every day about how imperfect I am, and about how much God really wants me to return to Him. Remembering to trust Him...and actually trusting Him...is sometimes harder than it sounds. I'm not perfect at it–far from it–but the Lord knows that, and understands that, and He makes it so that I can have help. He has placed some amazing people and examples in my life. I can turn to them anytime and they will always help me when they are able. They always say exactly what I need to hear and I know that God works miracles for me through them. I hope that I can be like them in time, and be able to bless those around me.

I hope you all have a wonderful week! Remember whose you are, and that He has a plan for you! He loves you very much, and so do I.

Xoxo
Mattie

Daily scripture study changes lives.

Man, what a week!! We had our first group of scouts, and it was crazy! But we did it!! We had a lot of challenges, as is expected with teen boys, but we learned and grew as a staff. Next week will bring more challenges and lessons but it will be worth it!

I have really been blessed this week as I've studied my scriptures each night. I'm able to get more out of my experiences here at camp, and I am able to be more in tune with the Spirit, as well as be more determined and capable of working hard. This week I've been reading in First Nephi Chapters 1 and 2. There are a couple of things that stood out to me that I thought were profound and wanted to share. 

One thing I noticed was that in chapter one, Nephi makes a statement that he is first going to be making an abridgement of his father's record, and then he will make his record. How awesome is that? Nephi was doing family history before it was cool. I recently finished a book series by Richard Paul Evans, entitled The Walk. And there is a part in one of the books where the main character's father writes the history of his family at least three generations back. And I just thought, "how cool is that?" Family history is becoming a worldwide thing. And Nephi did it before it was cool. 

In chapter two, Nephi says that the Lord "did soften my heart that I did believe all the words which had been spoken by my father". Which means that Nephi, at one point, did not fully believe. However, unlike Laman and Lemuel, he did not harden his heart, so he was able to be converted, and believe his father's words.

I know that daily scripture study changes lives. I've seen the impact that it has on not only my life, but my friends' lives. I've seen the wonderful changes in them that it has had. I'm grateful to have so many wonderful examples of how important daily scripture study is. And I'm grateful to be blessed with so many amazing people to love and look up to. I know they love me, too, even when we're miles and miles apart.

I'm really grateful for the scriptures. I'm grateful for Joseph Smith's sacrifices to translate the Book of Mormon. I'm grateful for Mormon, and his dedication to abridging the book and making sure everything we would need is in there. I'm grateful for the pieces of truth that they hold, and for the ones that I've learned this week as I've studied them. I'm grateful for the light that they bring to my life. I'm grateful for the beauty of Bear Lake, and for my wonderful co-workers. I'm blessed each and every day by their examples, humor, service, and love. It's been a hard week but we've gotten through it together, and we all build each other up as often as we can. It's been an amazing experience and I can't believe we're going to be on week three this week!!

I'm grateful for my Father in Heaven, and for the love that He shows me each and every day. I'm grateful for the beauty of the world around me, and for the chance I have this summer to be surrounded. I'm grateful for my Savior, and for His sacrifice and love. Since it's Father's Day, I can't forget my own dad. I love him so much! I'm grateful for all that he does for me. I'm grateful for all the father figures in my life—my uncles, grandpas, and the other men in my life that I look up to. You are all wonderful examples of what real men are supposed to be like. Thank you for showing me how a man is supposed to treat the women in his life. Thank you for being willing to serve. And thank you for being willing to be soft and emotional, even when the world tells you you need to be tough and stoic.

I hope everyone is having a great summer!! Don't forget to wear sunscreen and drink water!! And remember who you are, and whose you are. God loves you very much and has many blessings in store for you. Be patient and remember that everything will work out in the end. Love you!! 💜

Xoxo
Mattie

Trust Him, and trust His timing.

While I was sitting during the passing of the sacrament, I decided to read one of my favorite passages of scripture about the Atonement, and I had these thoughts:

Alma 7:11-13 is one of my favorite passages about the Atonement. It really emphasizes more of what Jesus felt and had to go through for us. I love that it emphasizes 'according to the flesh'. It gives me a better idea of what kinds of things He went through for me. He knows how difficult it is to overcome temptations, and He knows how hard heartbreak is. He knows how much I try to rise above my depression and anxiety, but He also knows how hard it is, and how disappointed in myself I am when I can't rise above it. He knows it all. And He knows how to help. Each person and each situation is completely unique, but He knows exactly what you need. <3

One of my favorite things that some people said in their testimonies today was that Heavenly Father loves us. And He wants what is best for us. And sometimes what is best for us is different than what is best for someone else, but that doesn't mean that what is best for you or them isn't what is best for you or them. Does that make sense? Just because someone else's best isn't your best doesn't meant that your best is any less.

Kelli said in her testimony something that I loved. "It's not the sin that makes Him cringe; it's when we don't repent that makes Him cringe." I loved that! It doesn't matter if it's the same sins over and over again...as long as we keep trying, and we repent, He is happy. He knows we are mortal and human, and we make mistakes. He doesn't expect us to be perfect right now, but He expects us to try to be better today than we were yesterday. And it is up to us to determine how close we are to God. God is right there waiting for us; we have to make an effort to draw close(r) to Him.

Kaitlin said, "Sometimes we don't know where we're going in our lives, but when we trust Him, and trust that He has a plan, He will guide us and bless us." I loved that. It's important to have a general plan, but honestly, most of the time we don't know where we are going in life. So we need to trust Him. He has a plan for each of us. He will guide us and bless us, and help us become who He knows we can become, and He can help us get to where we need to be.

Dallin said that, "Every time we follow the Spirit, we can be an instrument in people's lives." I loved this. It's so important for us to follow the Spirit and help those around us. We never know completely what's going on, but Heavenly Father does, and He sends us to help those who really need help and love.

Ingrid said, "He loves us and we are not forgotten." I loved that!! He KNOWS us! He LOVES us! We are HIS! How loved we are by the Creator and ruler of all! We are NEVER forgotten!! We are so important to Him, and we are SO LOVED!!

Don't worry about it.

So I was listening to/singing the hymn "Lead Kindly Light" today and I came to the realization that the song is about Jesus Christ, seeing as He is the Light of the World. I don't know why I never realized it before. But I thought that was an awesome thing to notice today. :)
I've been thinking lately about a lot of things, and one of those is that I'm not doing enough. Sure, I'm doing a lot, and it's fine, but I'm not doing enough. And I can do better. I can be better. I might be struggling or in a hard spot right not, but I can do more. I can pray for guidance and assistance, and I can focus better, and try harder. Honestly sometimes I don't want to try or do anything, but I can. I have, and I will again. Sometimes life is hard and goes unplanned, or against your plans and wishes, but if you trust in God, and have faith, everything will be all right, and you will be blessed. 

I got a new calling today! I am the assistant ward choir director and I am super grateful and excited! I'm also grateful for my Bishop, who was inspired to bless me with what I needed to hear when he was setting me apart.

Church was SO amazing today. :)

Here's some of my favorite things from Sunday School today:
-Even though things can be hard here (on Earth), coming here (Earth) can make things better for us in the end.
-Knowing where we come from gives us purpose.
-It's God's plan for us to act, and to do what He wants/needs us to do.
-The Lord still has a plan for us that works around Satan's! Heavenly Father works with you as things change.

Relief Society was so amazing today! I'm going to miss Candace but am so excited for her to move forward with life!
-Strive to go to the temple. Do what you need to be able to go, and even if you can't, you will be blessed.
-Holiness is in striving and the struggle to keep the commandments.
-Anything worth having is hard to get.
-Holiness is making the choices that will keep the Holy Ghost in our life.
-You can make things holy by the attitude you have as you go about doing them.
-Jesus Christ is the center of holiness, of happiness. He sees us as His daughters and He loves us.
-Through His atonement, I can be redeemed, born again, changed, and righteous.

We went to the temple today to just walk around and ponder, and it was so peaceful! All my anxieties about my struggles melted away. I had all these questions, about why I've been struggling, why am I struggling, how could I fix it, and I couldn't find an answer in the scriptures, so I just sat there, and listened and felt the breeze brush past me, and listened to the birds singing. And I had this thought. "Don't worry." I was like, "What? But I have so many things that I am struggling with and need help to work on." Again, "Don't worry about it." So then I got up, headed down the path down to the front and there was this point where I just stopped, and I turned to look at the temple. It was so pretty. And I closed my eyes for a second, and this thought passed through my mind, "Thine adversity shall be but a small moment." And then I smiled and opened my eyes and walked down to where we were meeting to close. That was such a comforting thought and I needed it.

So grateful for the messages today! I'm so grateful for the Spirit that I've felt and for the promptings that I received. I'm also grateful for the little tender mercy that happened as we were walking to the car back from the temple. This guy pulled up in his car, kind of blasting his music, but not really. Anyway, the song was "See You Again". Which was my graduation song two years ago today. And I don't know why but I needed that, and thinking about it now, that moment helped me remember who I am. Where I've come from. How far I've come. Where I've been. Where I am now. How I'm changing. How I'm wanting to change. How I'm trying. And that reminds me of my blessing today. How God sees me. He sees my efforts. He sees my struggles, and He is so proud of me. He is proud of who I am. How far I've come. How hard I try. How much I love and care. And how much He loves me.

Kiera played "Savior, Redeemer of My Soul" in the car on the way home. I love that song so much and am so grateful for its message! Especially today. It's so amazing–I have a Savior, who loves me. Cares for me. Died for me. And every day He is there for me. He is my Savior. My Redeemer. I wouldn't be who I am today without Him. What a blessing it is for me to have Him with me always. And what a blessing He is to me.  ❤️❤️

Xoxo
Mattie

Actions speak louder than words.

I've probably mentioned and shared this song before, but it's one of my favorites. It's called "It Passes All My Understanding" by Cherie Call. It came on the radio this morning and I just couldn't let it be. It describes all of my feelings about Heavenly Father and His creations–all of nature, and all of us. He believes in us and loves us so much–He created this world for us. It is one of my favorite songs about the world around us that our Heavenly Father has created for us. I hope you'll take a listen to it.

This is a random thought I had the other night. If you're a friend of mine on Facebook you've probably already seen it but for those that aren't, I will share it with you:

Dreams are crushed. Hopes are dashed. Life is shattered. But only when you put them on your "this is going to happen this way" pedestal and wish for it to be that way only. When you've given a little room for them to grow and develop, dreams are built. Hopes are known. Life is changed.

I'm so grateful for the knowledge that I have that my Heavenly Father has a plan for me because it makes it easier for me to know that things won't always go the way I plan them to, but things will work out.

As I was sitting during the sacrament, I was thinking about two different scriptures: Matthew 5:16 and Isaiah 53:3-4. And this is what I thought about and wrote down:

"Actions speak louder than words." That's a common phrase that everyone knows, right? But do we really believe it? These two scriptures that I thought about both talk about actions. The verse in Matthew talks about our actions. We need to let our light–the light of Christ–shine through our good works, or actions. The verse in Isaiah talks about the actions of Jesus Christ. He died for us. Think of someone you really love. Would you die for them? Some would and some maybe wouldn't; that's okay. But Jesus Christ–the Only Begotten Son of our Heavenly Father–suffered and died for all mankind. And throughout His whole experience with Pilate and the Roman soldiers, He said nothing; nothing of protest, nothing of explanation. He was quiet, and let it happen because it had to happen. I don't know about you, but I am extremely grateful for Jesus Christ's example of how to love. John 15:13 says, "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Jesus Christ is also the perfect example of how to deal with those who may be talking about you–in front of or behind your back. Say and do nothing. If you do not react, they will soon move on. In the Savior's case, however, they went on to beat Him and give Him a crown of thorns. Then they nailed Him to a cross, where He suffered in agony and died for us. If that isn't love, I don't know what is. 

 I am one of those people who likes to serve others and make their lives easier. Whether it's by being there for them when they need me, babysitting, listening, or serving them in a small way, that's me; that's what I love to do. And to me, those actions mean that I am there for them, I am listening to them,  and I am loving them. Our Savior oftentimes will send us to those who need love and guidance from Him for Him (did that make sense? He will send us in His place). Sometimes, when I am there for someone, listening to them, and loving them, they not only feel my love, but they feel the Savior's love because they needed to feel Him, and I was able to help them do that. The way that He shows His love is that He died for us, and because of that, He will never leave us alone. He will never let you feel lost or alone for long. He will always send someone to save you.

Sometimes we have to let go.

We all have dreams and aspirations. We all want things in our life.

I've learned, though, that sometimes we have to let things go. Sometimes for a little while, sometimes for forever.

I'm not saying that you can't still want it; you can. But sometimes, if it's a dream that's a little ways off, and you let it go–if only for a brief time–you can live in the moment better.

If we're always focused on the future, we forget to live in the moment.

By putting aside some of your dreams, you're able to focus on your life right now. And that is sometimes more important than your dreams. If you're always waiting for the future, and not taking proper care of yourself, there won't really be any future for you, will there?

Sometimes we just have to let go.

Sometimes when we let go, we'll realize that that's not really what we wanted, and we'll have saved ourselves some time and money.

And sometimes, if it's important enough, we'll eventually find a way to achieve it.

Everything will work out in the end. You just have to trust your Heavenly Father.

He has a better plan for you than you could ever imagine.

And sometimes that plan includes letting go.

Fitting in. Or not.

I love this quote! It's comforting to me. I don't fit in sometimes because I wasn't meant to. The Lord has a plan for me and He's guiding me through it. I also know that I'm never alone, even if I am literally or figuratively. He is always there to comfort me. 

I must be needed somewhere else.

I think I finally know why I didn't get into the talent show. Because, the night of the talent show, I was at young women's, where we had an activity where we wrote on slips of paper different qualities and characteristics we liked and admired about each of the other girls. And I got lots of compliments on my singing. And today I checked Ms. Nudd's list for choir next year, and that finalized that I didn't get in. And Heavenly Father knew that I wasn't going to get in and so He didn't let me get into the talent show so that He could let me know through my friends that I have an amazing voice and that some of the girls think that I am the best singer in the world. I am so grateful for that. My Heavenly Father needs me somewhere else next year instead of choir. I hope I can find out why. This experience just reminds me that, if things don't always work out, I must be needed somewhere else. I just have to trust in Him because He knows what is best for me.