Sunday, May 27, 2018

It's up to us to turn towards Him.

I was reading in Alma earlier this week and had the thought that the Lamanites and Nephites had many cycles of righteousness and wickedness, and Heavenly Father gave them many second chances. I, too, have had many cycles of righteousness and 'wickedness', and Heavenly Father has given me so many second chances. I am so thankful for that! This week has been a difficult week in several ways but I've made it and am totally pleased with my choices. Hopefully this next week will be a lot easier. I've really been blessed these past couple weeks. I don't think we realize just how much a part of our lives our Savior and Heavenly Father are. I'm so thankful for their part in my life. I'm getting ready to go to Bear Lake this summer for work and I've been super stressed about it, but the last 24-ish hours I have been on top of the ball! I have to finish making my shopping list and then go shopping tomorrow, and then I have to finish packing. I'm excited for all the fun adventures that are going to happen this summer, but I'm nervous I'm going to forget something. But I'm trying to be positive, and in control of my anxiety and depression. Some days it's hard, and I feel lost, lonely, and unloved, but I know I'm not alone, I know I'm loved, and I know that my Savior is with me, so I know I'm really not lost. He knows where I am, and I just don't know where I am yet.
There's a song by Hilary Weeks that I love. It's called "Where I Am" and it's talking about how when Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are with us, we know where we are. I'm not always sure of where I am...lately I've been feeling really lost...but I know that as long as I am trying to do the right things, and as long as I am trying to be closer to my Savior...I don't need to worry. Because if I am not going in the right direction, He'll let me know. I can count on Him to guide me in the right direction.

One of the speakers in sacrament meeting said that, "Charity is something you acquire, and make a part of you... True charity is love in action. You are the gift. Fill the hunger for human connection... More isn't always better. Sometimes it's just more." I really loved this! Charity is a way for us to connect with other people! Deep down, everyone craves connection. Charity is a way for us to help create this connection between those who need and want it...and those who can show them love. The last thing that she said was that more isn't always better. I loved that. Sometimes, we go out of our way and over the top to show someone we love them, or to help someone in need...but sometimes all they need is someone to listen. Sometimes all they need is someone to watch their kids. Sometimes all they need is someone to tell them they are loved. Something simple, sweet, short.

I loved what the other speaker in sacrament meeting talked about. He talked about how Jesus grew. He brought up this scripture, Luke 2:52, which reads: "And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favour with God and man." One thing that I noticed while he was talking about this scripture was really interesting:
  • Wisdom = Mentally
  • Stature = Physically
  • Favour with God = Spiritually
  • Favour with man = Socially
It states specifically in the scriptures that Jesus grew and increased in all of the areas that we all struggle with! At one time or another, we have all struggled (or will struggle with) at least one of these, if not all of them. And Jesus knows how we feel!! Not just because He felt our personal struggles when He atoned for us, but because He, too, experienced it for Himself! That is so amazing!! 

He also brought up the talk by Elder Massimo De Feo of the Seventy entitled "Pure Love: The True Sign of Every True Disciple of Jesus Christ", from the last General Conference. He talked about how Elder De Feo's mother was not a member of the church, and she was sick, and asked her son to teach her how to pray. Elder De Feo goes on to say, "How can someone who is in such great pain pray for someone else. She is the one in need." The answer? Pure love. His mother loved him so much that she forgot about herself. In her most critical hour, she loved him more than she loved herself. If this sounds familiar, you're correct. Someone else we know and love prayed for others while He was in great pain. Our Savior. He loved us so much that He was willing to go to great lengths to make sure that we could return to our Heavenly Father if we wanted to. Despite His pain and second thoughts, He went through it: He drank the bitter cup for us, and He died for us. All because He loved us.

Something some said today really stood out to me. He said, "Even great faith has a shelf life." I loved that. We have to make a daily effort to grow and maintain our faith. We are saplings in the gospel. We have to tend to our testimonies, our faith, our charity, our patience...all the attributes of Christ that we are trying to emulate and gain, we need to continuously tend to them. They will die if we don't nourish them.

Heavenly Father trusts us to do and be more. He really does. He's given us the tools and knowledge that we need to grow. He'll sometimes give us nudges...but ultimately, it's up to us. We have to be the ones to make the move. He will not force us to do anything we don't want to, but His arms are open, and He's knocking at our door. We just have to run to Him and let Him in.



I am so thankful for a Heavenly Father who gives me so many second chances. I am so thankful for a Savior who is always with me. I am so thankful for the opportunities I have to start over again. I don't think I deserve them, but I am grateful for them. I am so grateful that my Savior loves me and thinks that I am worth saving and redeeming. I am so thankful for supportive and loving friends and family. I don't think I could do this without them.

I am blessed to have such a loving and supportive Father in Heaven, and His Son, my Savior and Redeemer.

Well, this week is my last week at home! I'm heading up to Bear Lake on Friday for my job at a scouting camp! I'm excited! I can't wait! I'm hoping to still keep posting on my blog every week this summer, but they either will not be super long, or I will miss a couple of weeks. I hope not, but just in case, this is me letting you know.

I hope everyone has a great last week before summer officially starts! I hope everyone has a sweet Memorial Day. I'm so thankful for all those who have died while serving our country. I am grateful for their service, and I hope that I can always remember that people have died to protect the ground that I walk every day.



Sunday, May 20, 2018

Sometimes it's time to move.

I'm grateful for the chance that I have to start over each week...I just wish that I could forgive myself and move on from the past. It's hard to feel like God has forgiven me when I can't even forgive myself. I've been trying to work on forgiving myself, and loving myself completely–flaws and all. It's been difficult, and is taking time, and hasn't happened all at once, but I know that with the help of my Savior, and the support of my loved ones and close friends, I can do it. I just need to not give up, and keep going, even when I feel discouraged, and even when I make mistakes again.
One thing that stood out to me in sacrament meeting was, "Because of our Savior's Atonement, we can become whole again" (emphasis added). I really loved that statement. When we use the Atonement to be forgiven and start over, we become clean and whole, just like the day of our baptism.
One other thing that was said that I loved was, "First promptings are pure inspiration from heaven." I really loved that, and I firmly believe that that is a true statement. I am sure that I have been the answer to other people's prayers, and I know that other people have been answers to my prayer, and I am so thankful that they followed the promptings of the Spirit.

"You must learn to walk to the edge of the light, and then a few steps into the darkness; then the light will appear and show the way before you." ~Elder Harold B. Lee to Elder Boyd K. Packer soon after Elder Packer became a General Authority
I really liked this quote, and I loved the title of the article that it is from. It's called, "Move Forward in Faith", and I recently watched a video interview of the LDS singer/songwriter Calee Reed where she said, "Sometimes His timing means move now", and I absolutely LOVE this idea! Sometimes His timing means that we have to be patient, but sometimes His timing means that we have to have faith and just make a decision. He'll let us know if we make a wrong choice.

I think that we often put forth a lot of faith and hope that God will do everything for us. That if we pray for Him to do something, or give us something, that if we sit back and wait, He'll do it. 

But that isn't how He works. He has given us the gift of agency, which means that He will not force us to do anything, and He will not force anyone else to do anything, either. So when we ask Him for help, He expects us to finish praying, get up, and go out and do something. And as long as we are doing what we are supposed to be doing, we will be blessed, and we will receive the blessings that we have asked for–in due time. One of my favorite quotes of Elder Holland's is, "Some blessings come soon, some come late, and some don't come until heaven; but for those who embrace the gospel of Jesus Christ, they come." No one is perfect–all we can do is try our best. As long as we are doing our part, God will do His.

Life is hard. I don't know about you, but I have weaknesses that I can't overcome by myself. I have trials that keep coming back because I don't always know how to deal with them, and sometimes they change into a new form. Some days, I am doing GREAT. Some days...not so much, and I can't figure out how to deal with them...I can't figure out how to get over them...I can't figure out how to get rid of them. There are lots of times, as I'm trying to work through them, where I keep forgetting something...I keep forgetting someONE. I keep forgetting my Savior. With Him, I can do ANYTHING.

Even move.

I am so thankful that my Heavenly Father has not left me alone. Sometimes He's quiet...that's another thing that Calee said in the video I shared previously. Even when you're doing everything right...reading your scriptures, going to church, going to the temple...sometimes He's quiet. But that DOESN'T mean that He's not here. That doesn't mean that He doesn't care. That doesn't mean that He isn't helping guide you. He really will let you know when you're doing something wrong, or when you go ahead with a decision that isn't right for you. And if you can't feel His love...He will send you people who do, and they will show you just how much He loves you through their actions. They will bless your life just by being themselves, and just by being in your life. They will always listen. They will always love you. They will always be there for you. And they will sometimes wake up in the middle of the night because you needed someone to talk to and God knew you needed them.

I'm grateful for my Savior, and for the love that He has for me. I'm grateful for the strength that He gives me, and for the support that He has given me. I'm grateful for my friends who support me and love me, and who always show me just how much they care for me. I'm grateful for the life that I have been given, and I'm grateful for the experiences that I've had. I'm grateful that I am not alone in this life. I don't think I could make it by myself. I am grateful for the changes that have occurred in my life, and I'm grateful for the chances that I have had to change. I am grateful for the opportunities I have to serve those around me, and I'm grateful for the times that I have had to take time and let others serve me. I am grateful for the wonderful people in my life who love me. I can't imagine my life without you! Thanks for everything you do!! 

I hope you all have an amazing week! I know that God loves you very much and He wants you to talk to Him. Remember that He is always there for you.

Xoxo
Mattie

Sunday, May 13, 2018

Honor thy mother.

Today is Mother's Day, and I am so thankful for my mother, and for all the women in my life! I learn so much from each of them and I really look up to them. I am grateful for their examples of love, service, kindness, charity, and how to be a good woman, mother, and daughter of God. I don't know where I'd be without their love and examples.

Sacrament meeting was full of beautiful messages about mothers:
-We have no need to doubt, for our mothers know, so we can know.
-The relationships we have with God and with our mother are of equal importance.
-You can't remember mother and forget God; nor can you remember God and forget mother.

"If we want to be Christlike, honoring our mother is a crucial part." Bishop said that in Relief Society as a summary of the messages of sacrament meeting, and I loved it so much. My brother spoke in sacrament meeting today and he talked about how Jesus Christ treated His mother. Christ is the epitome of how to be Christlike (I mean, who else would be?) and He loved and respected His mother so much. If we are to be Christlike, we must treat our mothers as He treated His.

There are so many women in my life that I am so grateful for, look up to, and love so very, very much, but I'm just going to talk about a few of them.

I am so thankful for my mother. I have learned so much from her, and I know that she will always love me. I am blessed to have such an amazing example to look up to. She does so much for my family, and I hope that someday I can be even half the woman and mother that she is.

I am so thankful for my grandma. I love my grandma so much! She is always thinking of others and she is such a wonderful example to me of how to minister and care for those around you. She blesses my life and I am so, so thankful that I have her in my life.

I am so thankful for my aunts. I love them so much! They are all wonderful examples to me of Christlike love. They all do so much for their families, and I know that if I ever need them, they will be there for me.

I am so thankful for my Great-Grandma Harker and my Great-Grandma Radke. I am lucky enough to share a name with each of them (as well as my mother), and I learned so much from my Great-Grandma Harker when I was growing up. I never met my Great-Grandma Radke, but my dad has told me that I am like her in many ways. I am grateful for their examples and I am so thankful to bear their names! I hope that I can be as strong as they were, and I hope that I can do as much good as they did.

This is just a small portion of the women in my life, but I am so blessed to have so many wonderful women in my life! I know that they are and will be blessed for their service, love, and efforts to follow the Savior, and I know that I will be a better woman as I follow their examples.

Here are a few links to several different songs about mothers that I love and wanted to share with you.

I know that the women in our lives are some of the most important and special people to ever walk the planet. I am so thankful to have so many wonderful examples of beautiful and amazing women to follow in my life.

Happy Mother's Day to all of the women!! May you have a beautiful and special day filled with love.






Xoxo
Mattie

Sunday, May 6, 2018

Your worth is infinite, and so is God's love for you.

Sometimes it is so difficult to be patient. Sometimes it is so hard to wait for things you want. Sometimes it is so hard to be patient with people. Sometimes it's easier to be patient. But there's always room for improvement. Some days are more difficult than others, and some days are more easier than others. But even on those days, there is room for improvement. And if you remember how patient Christ is with us, and our shortcomings, I think you will be more likely to be more patient with those around you.
Something that someone said in their testimony today really stood out to me: "When someone wants to diminish the truth of something, they attack the character of the deliverer or main person in the event/story." I really loved this. Jospeh Smith faced a lot of criticism and attacks on his character, but he still stood strong. He still held his faith, and his testimony in Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I really admire that about him, and I really look up to him for that. He never backed down, even in times of turmoil or struggle. He stayed strong.

I didn't really take notes in church today because we had some of our cousins with us this weekend and I ended up sitting with A at the end of primary, and also in his class.

But! My friend texted me and reminded me of the worldwide devotional for young adults tonight and so I just watched it and I am so thankful that she texted me about it because I absolutely loved it!!

The speakers were Brother and Sister Kearon–Brother Kearon is from the Presidency of the Seventy.

Sister Kearon's talk was probably my favorite. She spoke about the love of our Father in Heaven. My favorite thing that she said was, "Your Father in Heaven loves you. Whoever you are, whatever you are struggling with, you are enough. He loves you just the way you are right here, right now, in all your beautiful messiness. But He also loves you enough not to let you stay the way you are." I loved that. He loves us as we are, but He also loves us enough to help us grow and change, and become a better person; He loves us enough to help us become more like Him.

She also talked about how the infinite and gentle love of God will help invite us to make changes in our lives. She talked about how we need to experience things that require change and growth, and help us to depend on God. We can do it. Jesus Christ–the Firstborn of God the Father–first bore our trials, sorrows, afflictions, etc. He has promised us hope, and healing, and He will be there. We were created for a joyful, abundant existence, she says. "Your worth is infinite, and so is God's love for you." No matter what you do, your worth is still the same in His eyes. He will always love you.

I am not even going to lie, as soon as Sister Kearon started talking about how "Learning to find, feel, and understand our individual worth, regardless of what other people might think or say about is critical to our lifelong emotional and spiritual well-being", I started to feel the Spirit so strongly, and by the time she got to the part where she was talking about how we are of endless worth to Heavenly Father, I was bawling because it was exactly what I have needed to hear.

Brother Kearon's talk was really great, too, and I really enjoyed his focus on ministering. He talked about first asking God for help to know who we can help. He talked about how the heart of our purpose here on earth is learning to look outward and serve one another. He also talked about how this kind of ministry is a way of life.

He talked about three things that we can do:
1. The kind of service we're assigned or invited to perform as a responsibility at church
2. The kind of service that we choose to do of our own volition
3. Public service

This is how the Savior lived, and this is why He lived.