My favourite Christmas gift.

I don't know about you, but my Christmas rocked! I received lots of new and nice things that I'm so grateful for, but my favourite gift—the one I'm most grateful for—is the gift of my Savior. His sacrifice for me—He didn't have to do it at all, but He chose to. Guys, He could have saved Himself; He could have showed His power to the nonbelievers, but He didn't. He wanted to sacrifice Himself because He loves us. Even when we don't deserve it—even when we are complete morons (because, let's face it—at some point, we all do something so incredibly stupid at least once), He still wanted to save us. He still wanted to give us the option to be able to either accept Him as our Savior, or to decline Him. If we decline His offer, we have to go through what He went through for us. I don't know about you, but I'm so grateful that He suffered for me so that I don't have to. It makes me sad that He had to suffer for every single person who's lived or will live on earth, but I'm so glad that I'm not alone. No person on earth has ever gone through exactly what I have, which makes it hard sometimes to sympathise or empathise, but He has been through it—completely and exactly the way that I have. And I'm so thankful for that. That means that I can turn to Him, and He will know exactly how to help me. I'm grateful that He and my Heavenly Father love me enough to give me a way out. Granted, it's not an easy way out—it does require a bit of work—but it's better than nothing. And I'm so thankful for the way out—sometimes I do something so bad or I lose my temper, but I know that I can be forgiven if I do it the right way—His way. 

A Christmas Post.

Today is Christmas Eve! Can't believe tomorrow's Christmas! It's been a long week, and an even longer day. My brothers' anticipation has kicked them to space and they've been crazy-hectic today. Though they know that Christmas is about the birth of Jesus Christ, they're too little to understand/remember why and what we celebrate on Christmas Day, and through the holiday season. I hope that, as they grow older, they will come to understand the real reason we celebrate Christmas, and I hope that they will come to love and adore their Savior just as much as I do. I am so thankful for Him, and for all He has done for me. I am also thankful for His mother, Mary, who had the strength and courage to accept the role of being His mother even though it was not ideal for her. I hope someday that I can be as pure and humble as she was, and I hope I can someday be as good a mother as she was and as good as my own mother.  

Well, I wish you a merry Christmas! I might not post tomorrow, which is why I did today. I still might post tomorrow; I guess we'll see. As you go about your day, remember to be safe, and remember our Savior. He loves you very much. :)

Christmas isn't just about His birth.

“You can’t separate Bethlehem from Gethsemane or the hasty flight into Egypt from the slow journey to the summit of Calvary. It’s of one piece. It is a single plan. It considers ‘the fall and rising again of many in Israel’ [Luke 2:34], but always in that order. Christmas is joyful not because it is a season or decade or lifetime without pain and privation, but precisely because life does hold those moments for us." ~Jeffrey R. Holland ("Shepherds, Why this Jubilee?" 2000)

I love this quote! Christmas isn't just about His birth, it is also about His life, and His Atonement. They're not separate plans; they are one and the same. Without His birth, there would have been no Atonement, and no example to look up to. They are interwoven events that can never be untangled. He agreed to come to Earth so that He could lead us by His example and so that He could save us with the Atonement because He loves us so much. 

He suffered for you, which is why He's there for you.

I don't know why, but this week was just so long, and so frustrating, and so hard. I just didn't feel super, super great like I usually do, ya know? I've cried a couple times this week for no apparent reason, but God has prompted me this week with things that have helped me remember who I am, and that have helped me remember who is always there for me: Jesus Christ. Christ is always, always there. When I'm sad, He's there. When I'm confused, He's there. When I feel so, so alone and so angry and so mad and so sad and so frustrated and so, so, so scared, let me tell you something: He is there. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, but He's there. He suffered for you, and He loves you, so why shouldn't He be there? He has felt your pains, and your sorrows, and your sicknesses, and your loneliness. He's felt it all. He knows what you're feeling, and He won't let you feel it alone, if you'll let Him help. He wants you to feel loved, and accepted, and wanted, and He wants you to feel of worth. Which you are all of those things. You're loved, accepted, wanted, and of worth to Him. He loves you so much. And I testify that He lives, and that He died and suffered for you, and that He wants you to turn to Him. He loves you, and I love you, too, and I know He cares about you so, so much. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

God loves you. And He knows just how to talk to you.

I went babysitting yesterday for some of the sweetest girls. I put the younger girl down earlier than I did the older one, and when I was putting the oldest to bed, I read her some stories. She picked the first one, and it was a silly book about animal sounds and how pigs don't sing. Anyway, I picked the second book, and she had a copy of You Are Special by Max Lucado. I absolutely love his books, especially that one, and so I picked that one and read it to her. I had to whisper it because she kept saying, "Marlie's sleeping, Marlie's asleep," and she wouldn't let me talk in an above whisper. Anywho, as I kept reading the story, I smiled as I remembered reading it when I was little. But when I got to the part where Punchinello goes to see Eli, I started to tear up and cry because Eli represents our Heavenly Father, and we are the Wemmicks, and Eli was telling Punchinello that he is special, and loved, and the dots and star stickers (stereotypes--smart, dumb, chipped, etc.) only stuck if he let them. And I just couldn't stop crying because I felt like God was talking to me, telling me through this book that I could have not chosen (there were several others that I had read as a child and would've loved to read again) that I was special. That I was loved. That it doesn't matter what others think of me. All that matters is what God thinks of me. And He thinks I'm special just the way I am. And if you haven't read You Are Special or any of Max Lucado's books, you need to go find some copies and read them because I know that they will touch you. As a child, you don't really understand the meaning of stories—to you, they're literally just stories. But as you grow older, you come to realize that some stories have morals, themes, meanings, or symbolize other things, and you pick up on them. I know that God speaks to us in different ways—He speaks often through other people and what they do, and He also speaks through promptings He gives to you. I know that He loves you just the way you are. I know that He knows you and knows which ways you receive His words and love best. I know that I picked that book yesterday for a reason; I know I was prompted to pick it to help me. I'm grateful for God's love and I'm grateful that He cares enough to let me know through a children's book that I'm special and loved just the way I am, and the only opinion that matters is His. 

I'm not perfect—I worry. A lot.

I love Christmastime and I'm super excited for Christmas break, but I'm also nervous and worried. My brothers have been really, really mean to each other for the past couple of weeks and I hope that they'll be nice to each other over the break. I also have no idea what to get my mother for Christmas! Also, I'm still trying not to bite my nails and I'm worried that it'll get worse over Christmas break because I'll have nothing to do, and that's usually when I bite my nails. And I've got a ton of things to do this week before the break, and so I'm just really worried and stressed I won't get any of it done. But, when I relax and breathe in and out slowly (very relaxing and helps me calm down when I'm super excited or overly stressed about something; I highly recommend it), I calm down and remember that I have God on my side, and He will help me get what I need done finished, if I ask Him and do my part. I know that I can get all of my homework done if I ask Him to help me understand the assignment and focus. I know that I can have the courage to ask my seminary teacher a question about our class on Friday. I know that I can have a clear mind this week and be at peace when my brothers come home and begin to fight with each other. I know that I will be able to think clearly about what to get my mother for Christmas. I know that with His help, I can make good decisions, I can have a clear head, I can prioritize my time, and I can do great things. I know I'm not perfect, and He knows I'm not perfect, but with His help, I can become more like Him. 

My testimony of the birth of Jesus Christ, His life and mission, and His love for us.

Now that it is December, it's time to celebrate the birth of our Saviour, Jesus Christ, and His life and mission. He was born to save us. I'm so grateful for His mother, Mary, who was so very courageous and brave in taking on the role of being His mother. I'm so grateful for Joseph, His earthly father-figure who, even though it was difficult, still married Mary and took care of Jesus and taught Him to be a carpenter. I'm so grateful for my Saviour, who was always conscious of His mission in life—doing His Father's work—and who did everything in His power to teach His apostles what He needed to teach them so that, when the time came, Joseph Smith Jr. would be able to read the Bible and know to ask of God. I know that Jesus lives. I know that He was born to His mortal mother, Mary, and I know that He lived as Heavenly Father would have lived, and I know that He suffered for me. I know He suffered for you. Even if you don't believe in Him, He still suffered for you. He loves you so much that He suffered and died for you, even when He knew that some of the people on Earth wouldn't ever believe in Him. I know He loves me. I know He loves you. And I really hope that you know that there are people out there who love you. I love you, even if I don't know you. I love you because I know that you are a son or daughter of a King—our Heavenly Father, who loves you so very much. You are so, so precious to Him, and I hope that you know that. I hope and pray that you will come to know Him and know that He loves you, and I hope and pray that you will come to know that this gospel—the Gospel of Jesus Christ—is true, and that God exists, and that He loves you. Because I know it is true, and I know that He loves me and I know that He loves you. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. 

End of November gratitude.

Hard to believe it's already the end of November!! I'm so grateful for my family and friends and for all they do and for their examples to me. I am grateful for the Thanksgiving season to get me in the mood for gratitude and I'm so excited for the Christmas season to celebrate the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. I'm grateful for Him and for all He's done for me, and for His love and faith in me. I love Him and am grateful that He believes in me and wants me to return to live with our Heavenly Father. 

Callings and Thanksgiving.

Today I was released from my calling as the Laurel class president and I'm grateful for the opportunity I had to serve with my two wonderful counselors and my awesome secretary. It was a wonderful experience and I am going to miss being the president but I'm grateful that I was released because I've had a lot of experience being a class president and I think other girls need the opportunity to serve.

This week is Thanksgiving!! I am so excited because I get to spend time with my (extended) family and eat food! I'm grateful for this country and for the freedoms we enjoy; I'm grateful for my family; I'm grateful for the home I live in; I'm grateful for my friends; I'm grateful for wonderful leaders, teachers, and mentors in my life; and most of all, I'm thankful for my Savior, and for His Atonement, and for His love for me. I know He lives and I know He loves me and I know He wants us all to return to live with our Heavenly Father. 

Gratitude.

So I feel kind of bad because I wasn't able to post yesterday! I got home from choir practice super late and then I was super sleepy and went to bed after I read my scriptures. This month is Thanksgiving! People always try and keep Christmas and Thangsgiving separated, but it's the holiday season! We should be grateful for Christ, because without Him we wouldn't have a reason to celebrate...He was born to save us, and it bothers me sometimes that people think that they are two separate holidays, because they go hand-in-hand with each other. Thanksgiving gets us into the mood of gratitude. And then we celebrate Christ's birth. I'm so grateful for Jesus Christ. Without Him, we wouldn't be able to return to Heavenly Father. So, even though some people believe Thanksgiving and Christmas should be separate, I believe they should go hand-in-hand. What's your opinion? Should November be about Thanksgiving and December about Christmas? Do you listen to Christmas music earlier than December? Comment below; I'd love to know what you think. :)

He is simply there.

I feel like life is so crazy; sometimes it's hard to do so many things. It makes it hard to keep track of time, and it makes it hard to let go of people who you either need to let go of or should let go of. But it doesn't matter what life throws at you because Christ is always there. I know that I've been saying this a lot, but it's because I know He's there and I feel like it's something that can never be overstated: He is simply always there. Whether or not you believe in Him, He is there. If your mom has died or is really sick and you think He's left you, He hasn't. If your dad is a drunk or left you when you were little and you think Christ isn't there for you, He is. Whatever your circumstances, He is there for you. He loves you so much and wants you to know that He loves you and wants you to come back to our Heavenly Father. I hope you know that it is never too late to return or find Him and I hope you know that He is always reaching out for you. 

Opportunities, blessings, and talents.

Not last year but the year before and the year before that I had the opportunity to be a part of a youth choir for Lehi Family Week and it was so fun. This year, I again have the opportunity to be a part of the youth choir and I am so excited! I love to share messages of the gospel through music and I am excited to be doing it again in a couple of weeks. Sadly, I have just realized this will probably be my last chance to be part of this amazing experience (I did not have a chance to do it last year because I did not get the memo soon enough and by then I did not think I could learn the music fast enough). Anyway, I'm grateful for the opportunity to be a part of it and I'm glad that I have the time to prepare. I'm also glad I have the talents :). I'm so lucky to be blessed with the talents I have and I'm so lucky to have grown up in a place that helps me nourish those talents. I know that God has a plan for me and I know He knows what He's doing to help me become the best me I can be. 

Blessings in disguise.

Sometimes changes in plans are blessings in disguise. Today I was supposed to be getting my senior pictures taken at 4:30pm, but because of the weather I decided to not chance it and will be getting them taken at the end of next week instead. Which I am okay with, because even though I was really bummed that we had to reschedule, I have a lot of homework to do for Monday, so it all works out in the end. I'm grateful that Heavenly Father knows what He's doing and I'm grateful that He is watching out for me. 

Charity.

So, today sacrament meeting was bittersweet because we received a new bishopric. I'm excited to get to know the new bishopric, but I'm going to miss the old one; I didn't fully cry, but I did get teary-eyed.

Today in Sunday School and Young Women's we learned about how to be more Christlike. I was like, "Ding, ding ding! This is what my blog is about." We read from one or two of President Uchtdorf's talks; we read the one where he says, "This topic of judging others could actually be taught in a two-word sermon. When it comes to hating, gossiping, ignoring, ridiculing, holding grudges, or wanting to cause harm, please apply the following: Stop it! It's that simple. We simply have to stop judging others and replace judgmental thoughts and feelings with a heart full of love for God and His children." And I love this! Yes, it is sometimes difficult, but I have been getting better at it! I look at or think of people I admire and love and I think, "They're a child of God. He loves them like He loves me. They chose to come to earth; they chose His plan, too," and it makes me happy. We also talked about charity, and service, and how, if we serve people more, we can learn to love them. It's hard not to love someone once you've served them and helped them. Charity is the pure love of Christ, and as we serve people, we come to be more like Christ, we grow closer to Him, and we come to understand those that we serve better.

He is There.

This is different from what I normally write, but I feel like it is something I should write.

So I know sometimes we all go through really bad experiences and we want them to go away, and sometimes people get so depressed and want to (or do) commit suicide, and that makes me sad, and so I decided to write a poem about it (and some music for the poem that I might post later). I've never been depressed, but I've been in a really deep and dark place, and I thought I couldn't get out, but I turned to my Savior and now I know that there is hope--I know sometimes it's hard to believe, but I know it--I didn't think so at first, but there is hope! And there isn't anything we can't do if we have Christ with us because with God, all things are possible.

He is There by Mattie Radke

Sadness swirls within me;

I cannot see the light ahead.

I stumble through the darkness, trying not to fall;

I fail, and fall miserably--deep, deep, and down. 

I try to get up, but I'm so lost--I can't tell up from down. 

I start to cry--am I alone? I feel like I am. 

Suddenly, I hear it. It's small, but it's there. 

A teeny, tiny voice, saying, "It's all right--I'm here."

I sob because I cannot find the source. 

I stand where I am and sob and sob. 

I begin to walk, because I can't sit still. 

I hear the voice again. It's gotten a little stronger. 

"It's all right," He says. "I'm here for you," He says. 

I don't believe Him. I can't seem to find or see Him. 

"I'm here," He insists gently. 

My sobs quiet down to gentle cries. 

I think I see a tiny light. 

Now it's a little bigger. 

"I said I was here, didn't I?" He says. 

I turn around. 

There He is. 

My Savior. 

He's holding out His hand for me to take. 

I begin to cry again and slowly walk towards Him. 

I take His hand, and together we walk towards the light. 

I did not know where I was; I still do not. 

But He knew. 

He was watching out for me the whole time. 

I know sometimes it's hard to believe, but it's true:

Jesus Christ loves and is watching out for YOU.

So, I want you to know that I am so, so thankful for Jesus Christ because He still loves me. I did something so, SO awful (for me) and He still loves me. I want you to know that when I say you can do it with Him, I mean it. With Him, we can! Please, please, don't try to do it by yourself, because--speaking from experience--it doesn't work. Please turn to Him--He is waiting for you, watching you, and looking out for you. He loves you very, very much, and I do, too, so please, please, please turn to Him. Also, the LDS church released a video about suicide prevention, and it is a good video. You can find the link here.

"The past can hurt...you can either run from it, or learn from it."

I hope you guys are enjoying my blog! I hope it's been helpful and edifying to you because it's helping me to express my love and appreciation for my Savior and for His gospel.

So, we've had lots of flies this year that are super, super annoying, and I was just thinking that they're kind of like our temptations/sins. The flies have been super in-your-face and on-your-face and bothersome, and that's kind of like temptation/sin sometimes. Temptations are often in-your-face/on-your-face (although not always! Sometimes they're so silent you don't even notice them) and they are quite bothersome. And sins--well, the reminders of sins--are sometimes in-your-face because Satan likes to remind us that we're not perfect. Well, news flash, Satan--we already knew that! Nobody is perfect but we are trying really hard to be more like our Savior so that we can return to live with our Heavenly Father. I'm not saying it's bad to remember your sins, because we need to learn from our mistakes, but don't focus on them too much. I know it's hard not to--believe me--and sometimes they seem so bad to us, and we're worried we won't be able to return, but I have a theory. Now, this isn't doctrine, just a theory I have--I think that those who worry about whether or not they will be able to return are the ones who oftentimes don't have to worry about it too much. Because you are showing an interest in whether or not you are worthy to return, this means that you are doing everything you can to become like Him so you can return. Again, this is just a theory I have, so it's possible it's either partially right or completely wrong. So long as you focus on being where you're supposed to be and doing what you're supposed to be doing; and so long as you never forget whose you are (Christ's) and you "remember, remember, that it is upon the rock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your foundation" (Helaman 5:12), you will be saved. Also, don't forget to repent! If you need to see your bishop, don't be afraid! He loves you very much and wants to help you! His door is open to you any time you need his help.

So, in summary: Nobody is perfect. Don't focus on your sins too much--like Rafiki in The Lion King said, "The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or learn from it"--learn from them, but don't worry too much. Focus on what you're supposed to be doing. Focus on whose you are. Focus on who you want to become. And don't forget to repent!

Love to you all!!

--Mattie :)

Becoming Christlike.

Patience. Love. Humility. Kindness. These are all attributes that I am striving to continuously have, as well as many more, because they will help me become more Christlike. Patience is one I am always having trouble with because sometimes little things make my temper flare. But I am striving to be better at being patient because I know it will help me in the future; I know it will help me become more like Christ. All of these attributes—including many others—will help/benefit me in the future. Striving to obtain these attributes now will make it easier for me so that I don't have to worry about obtaining these attributes in the future; I will just have to worry about maintaining them. In order to get/stay on the path to becoming more like Him, you have to just choose one to work on! :) Work on it until you feel like you need to work on something else. As you strive to become more like Christ, you will come closer to Him. 

Conference.

Conference is now over. I'm so grateful for all the messages given. I noticed something about two of the talks:

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf: The process of gathering spiritual light is the quest of a lifetime. 

Elder Allan F. Packer: Qualifying for exaltation becomes a quest of a lifetime. 

Do you see it? They're both talking about "quest of a lifetime". I love conference because sometimes the messages all coincide--and no one is given a topic. They all prayerfully ask Heavenly Father what He would have them speak on and write the talk. I think it's cool that a lot of the speakers talked about the prophets, and I think it's funny that both President Uchtdorf and Elder Packer talked about quests of a lifetime. In qualifying for exaltation, we can gather spiritual light. It will be the quest of a lifetime, and it will be glorious. 

Conference weekend.

This weekend is conference weekend, and we have heard so many good messages already! I love conference weekend because I love to hear all the messages and I love to listen for what God wants me to hear, and learn, and know. I always hear something that hits me hard or that I need to work on. I would now like to bear my testimony: I know that Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father love us all. I know that He lives. I know Jesus want us to return and I know that He has prepared the way for us. I know He speaks through the prophets and apostles to us. I know that prayer works. I know that if we do our best, He will help us finish. I know that He gives us families to learn and grow in. I know He gives us trials to strengthen us. I know that with Him, weaknesses can become strengths. I know He loves us all, and I know that He atoned for us because He loves us. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. 

Jesus Christ, Healer.

I am so thankful for the opportunity I had this month to delve deeper into who Jesus Christ is as our Saviour and Redeemer and the other names I chose to focus on. I am going to end with Jesus Christ as our Healer. The reason He atoned for us, and died for us, was because He loved us, and He wanted to be able to help us get back to our Heavenly Father. We can't do that alone; we all make mistakes, and we all become broken pieces of what we used to be. And Jesus is there to help us heal. When I made a big mistake a couple years ago, I became broken, and miserable, and I felt so alone. But guess what? Jesus was there, and He helped me pick up the pieces, and slowly—ever-so-slowly—I have been putting them back together. Sometimes I break some of the pieces again, but He is so patient, guys. You don't understand how patient He is!! I am still putting the pieces together, but He is always right there, helping me. I love Him so much because He has done so much for me when I caused Him so much pain, but He loves me and that is why He atoned and died for me. That is why I know I am never alone: because He loves me! He died for me! And I will never be able to thank Him enough! He is my Saviour, my Redeemer, my Mediator, my Healer, and my Best Friend. I can always count on Him because He never leaves me. He has always been there for me when I needed Him; He has never left my side, especially when I needed Him the most. That is when He picked me up and carried me because I could not walk! He know everything about me and how I work, and so He knows what I can handle and what I can't and He works with me through everything—when I am frustrated about school, about my family, about myself as a person—He works with me through all of that and more. Guys, I don't know what else to say except this little bit of a song I'm working on:

"In a sea of faces, I only know so many

But He knows them all personally

He knows your doubts

He knows your fears

He knows all about you

He knows your hopes

He knows your dreams

He knows all about you

He knows

He knows you."

That is all I have so far but it is so true! He knows everything about you and He knows you personally. I love you all and I know that God loves you very much. Don't ever forget that. We can't comprehend how much sometimes, but He died for us; that's the price He was willing to pay for us. Just remember that He knows you, He loves you, and He died for you. 

Jesus Christ, Lamb of God.

Doctrine and Covenants 76:39 says, "For all the rest shall be brought forth by the resurrection of the dead, through the triumph and the glory of the Lamb, who was slain". Jesus Christ is the Lamb of God. This is a reference to the fact that He was a sacrifice for the sins of mankind—of us. Through His sacrifice, we can be resurrected and we can be saved. We were not redeemed with things of the earth like precious metals, "But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot" (1 Peter 1:19). He was the perfect example and He was the perfect sacrifice—He died without having made a single mistake—and that makes Him the Lamb of God. 

Jesus Christ, Mediator.

Jesus Christ is our Mediator. A mediator is a person who tries to make people come to an agreement or makes it so that the price is met. Doctrine and Covenants 76: 69 says, "men made perfect through Jesus the mediator of the new covenant, who wrought out this perfect atonement through the shedding of his own blood." Through His Atonement, He agreed to be our Mediator—that is, if we agreed to do our best to the best of our abilities, He would make up the rest. He already paid the price—we just need to do our best to get back to Him and He will make up the rest. There is a video that explains this perfectly here:

http://broadcast.lds.org/video/BookOfMormon_Presentations/BM_GospelDoctrine_Video_05_Lesson30_Mediator_04396_eng_1M.mp4

Like the man in debt, we, too, are in debt—not monetary debt, but a debt of sin. With Jesus as our Mediator, we will be able to come clean through His Atonement if we choose to accept Him as our personal Savior. 

Jesus Christ, Only Begotten Son.

To be honest, it was only recently that I understood the term "Only Begotten Son", and it was thanks to my brother. Before we came to Earth, we lived in Heaven as spirit sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father. Jesus Christ was our Elder Brother. When we came to Earth, we received a body of flesh and blood from our Earthly parents. Jesus Christ is the Only Begotten Son of our Father in Heaven—He was born of a mortal mother, Mary, and an immortal father—our Heavenly Father. He is the Only Begotten Son—meaning He is the only literal Son of our Heavenly Father. This is an important name because if Jesus had just been born of a mortal mother and a mortal father, then He couldn't have atoned for our sins and afflictions because He'd be mortal, like us, and wouldn't have been able to handle it. But He was born of His mortal mother, Mary, and of His immortal father, Heavenly Father. He wasn't just a human—he was an immortal God who chose to accept His part in The Plan of Happiness and die for us so that we could come to Him in our time of need and so that we didn't have to pay for our sins and afflictions. I'm grateful for His love and sacrifice for me, and I'm grateful for the prompting I had from the Spirit to focus on Jesus Christ this month because I am learning so much more about Him. :)

Jesus Christ, Redeemer.

Jesus Christ is our Redeemer. To help you, I have kindly looked up the word redeemer. A redeemer is a person who redeems someone or something. I also looked up redeems. Redeems means compensates for the faults or bad aspects of. What it all comes down to is this: Jesus Christ was (and is) willing to redeem you; that is, pay for everything wrong you've done. He did this through the Atonement. Through the Atonement, we can change to become a better version of ourself so that we can ultimately live and dwell in His presence. I know He lives. I know that He died for us. I know that He wants us to use the Atonement to save ourselves (If we don't use the Atonement, then He will have done it in vain. But guess what? He'll still love you. He will always love you). He wants to help us return to live with our Heavenly Father. But the only way to do that is through Him—our Redeemer. If we let Him, He can help us redeem ourselves and become worthy to live in His presence. But only if we let Him. He has done all He can until you let Him in—then He will help you with the rest. :)

Jesus Christ, Resurrection.

In Mosiah 16, verses 7 & 8, it says, "And if Christ had not risen from the dead, or have broken the bands of death that the grave should have no victory, and that death should have no sting, there could have been no resurrection. 8 But there is a resurrection, therefore the grave hath no victory, and the sting of death is swallowed up in Christ." I love these scriptures, especially today as one of my friends passed away today. She will be dearly missed, but her mission on earth has been fulfilled and she has a new mission in heaven. It is comforting to know that "death is swallowed up in Christ". We will all be resurrected because we came to earth, and all because of Jesus Christ, who died for us and then rose again on the third day. I know He lives!! I know that He was resurrected and I know that I will see all of my family and friends who have died again. What a comforting thought!!

Jesus Christ, Savior.

First, happy anniversary to my blog! It was exactly one year ago today I started this blog for one of my personal progress projects. Over this year I have learned so much about this gospel and who I am. It has been a privilege, followers, to share my testimony with you. Second, I am going to try and do something different this month. I am going to try and write something different about Jesus Christ every time I post something on my blog this month. Sunday—even though it was technically August—was the start, with Son of Man.

Today, I want to talk about Jesus Christ as the Savior. He's our Savior! He was tormented, mocked, and crucified for us because He loves us. He is our Savior. If you had been the only person on the ENTIRE earth, He still would have suffered for your sins and afflictions. He loves you that much. Can you imagine that? Imagine the person you love the most on this earth—imagine that love for them, times it by 300,000...no wait...times it by infinity, and that's not even CLOSE to how much Jesus Christ loves us. And guess what else? He loves us all individually. That's right. I said individually. Just like when He atoned for your sins and afflictions individually, He loves you individually. As a person. He knows your name. We talk about Jesus Christ as the Savior of the world—which He definitely is—and sometimes we don't focus on the fact that He is our personal Savior. This is very, very important to remember. He suffered and died for everyone, even for those that don't believe. In 1 Timothy 4:10 it says, "For therefore we both labour and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Saviour of all men, specially those that believe." He died for everyone—especially those who believe in Him. But it's important to remember that He died for you as an individual. He died for you, and He died for me. And I will never, ever be able to repay Him. But He still did it—He never did it for the glory, or for the reward. He did it because He loves us—you and me. No one is perfect—we all make mistakes—and He still loves us. He suffered and died for us—for you and for me. I don't know about you, but I have made many, many, many, many stupid mistakes that I wish I could take back but I can't. But He paid for them. He didn't have to—He could have chosen to not accept His role in Heavenly Father's plan, or He could've wiped out all of the Jews who were planning to kill Him. But He didn't. We are that important to Him. Don't ever, ever, EVER forget how important you are to Him: He died for you. He will not EVER leave you alone. EVER. He will make sure you are taken care of. I love Him because of His sacrifice for me. I love Him because He loves me. I love Him because He's my Elder Brother and He wants me to be saved—He wants me to be safe and sound, back in heaven, so He died for me. I love Him because I am able to love Him. I love Him because I feel His love, and that's why I love Him: because I can. 

(I also love you, treasured followers :). Please let me know if you have any questions and I will try and answer it or I will help guide you to references that can help you answer it. Or, if you're too shy, lds.org is a wonderful place to start :). )

Jesus Christ, Son of Man.

Today, third hour was combined with the young men and we learned about Jesus Christ—who He is and how we can show our love for Him in our daily lives. In the topical guide of the Bible, there's about 20 or so pages full of scriptures that have to do with Christ. There are lots of different names for Him, like Savior, Redeemer, Messiah, Lamb of God, Bread of Life, Good Shepherd, Rock, Son of Man, and Only Begotten. And they all fit Him. But my favorite name for Him (at this point in my life—it will probably change my whole life) is Son of Man. Because I think that sometimes we forget that He was not only a God, but He was also human—through His mother, Mary, who was a mortal woman. And, to me, Son of Man is my favorite name for Him right now, because He, too, was human—He was a perfect human, but He was human nonetheless. He lived a mortal life, learned how to be a carpenter, and did human things that humans do—eat, talk, teach, learn, etc. And right now in my life, I need to remember this. I need to remember that He was human, too, and that He knows what I'm going through not only because He is my Savior and He atoned for my sins, afflictions, etc., but because He was also human. And I love Him all the more for that because He chose to accept His role, and when it came and He had a hard time with it—He who was a God—He could've stopped anytime, but He said, "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me; nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done" (St Luke 22:42). He loved us so much and He loved His father so much that He followed through with His part in Heavenly Father's plan. And I will never be able to thank Him enough. 

Love.

"I know that the words of truth are hard against all uncleanness; but the righteous fear them not, for they love the truth and are not shaken."~~2nd Nephi 9:40

The righteous love the truth. Their foundation is built upon the rock, which is Christ. They cannot be shaken because they trust and believe in Christ.

"Thou shalt not avenge, not bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: I am The Lord."~~Leviticus 19:18

Love thy neighbor as thyself. Love your neighbors as you love yourself. Be kind to those around you—show them that people do care about them and that they are not just a face in a sea of people. 

Today, I want to leave this with you: you are a stranger to other people as other people are a stranger to you. Be kind to them if you want them to be kind to you. Love everyone just as God loves you and them. Be nice. Give them hope. You might be the answer to their prayers and you just might learn something about them, yourself, or God. Or all of the above. But please, please, please be kind to those around you. Someone may need your smile or just someone to say hi. They might need help picking up their books off the floor or making new friends. Please be loving, kind, and inclusive. That's all anybody ever wants, isn't it? To be loved and to fit in. So do it! Make people feel loved and feel included. And hey—maybe you'll find a new friend. 

With Him we can.

Whew! First week of school is over!! I can't believe I am a senior. I sincerely hope that the homework load isn't all that heavy this year, but if it is, I know that, with The Lord's help, I can do it!! Just like in the song by Mercy River, "With Him We Can" (which you should most definitely look up—do it! Go! Look it up...now!), with His help, we can do it. We can get through this trial. We can do this homework. We can pass this test. We can make our dreams come true. Because our Heavenly Father loves us, He wants to do everything He can to make us happy—He wants us to be happy. And, with Him, we can. 

Hope.

So, I totally love this gospel. Do you want to know why? Well, I'll tell you why. Because it gives me hope. All the time—no matter what I'm going through, it gives me hope. If I'm having a rough day, I can pray to my Heavenly Father and He will give me peace and comfort that tomorrow will be better. If I feel alone, I can pray to Him to help me find someone to talk with and He will guide me to where I need to be so that I can find them. If I am watching a friend die slowly, or if I've had deaths in my circle of family and friends, I can pray to Him to comfort me and I know that they will be or are at peace and that I will see them again someday. And I know that through my Savior, Jesus Christ, I can become clean and start over so that I can try to become a better person than I was yesterday so that I can live with my Heavenly Father again. And that? That gives me hope. 

"Ask, and it shall be given you"

Totally random, but I changed the look of my blog. And I know most people won't have seen the old version, but I'm just letting you know it didn't always look the way it does now. Anyway, that's not what I wanted to talk about.

In one week, I will be back in school. And I'm frightened. So, so frightened. But I'm also excited. It's a toss up. I'm frightened because it's my last year in high school and what if I fail some of my classes???? I am a good student, but sometimes I worry about "what if I fail?" and I just don't want to be held back because I failed a class. I'm excited because it's my last year in high school!! Woohoo!!

So you see why it's a toss up.

But I have this paper—like a spiritual directory—and for "When you need help in school", the scripture to look at is Doctrine and Covenants 136:32, and it reads: "Let him that is ignorant learn wisdom by humbling himself and calling upon the Lord his God, that his eyes may be opened that he may see, and his ears opened that he might hear". And here is one that I love in St. Matthew 7:7: "Ask, and it shall be given you; seek and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you". And I know that if I have trouble this year in school—or anywhere I'm ignorant, really—I can ask my Heavenly Father and He will help me, as long as I do my part and do my best first before I ask for a little more help, He will answer my prayers. And I know that you can ask, too, and He will also help you. 

He lives and He loves you.

So, one of these days I'm going to post a video of me singing/playing a hymn or Primary song. But our house is too loud right now, so the lyrics will have to do for now:

A Child's Prayer

1) Heavenly Father, are you really there? And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer? Some say that heaven is far away, but I feel it close around me as I pray. Heavenly Father; I remember now Something that Jesus told disciples long ago: "Suffer the children to come to me." Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee. 

2) Pray, he is there; speak, he is listn'ing. You are his child; His love now surrounds you. He hears your prayer; He loves the children. Of such is the kingdom, the kingdom of heav'n. 

I love this song so much. The first verse is a little child, talking to their Heavenly Father, asking Him if He is really there. And by the end of the first verse, the child has remembered and wants to pray to Him. The second verse is a parent (or grandparent), bearing testimony to the child that He really is there and that He does listen. 

I know that He lives. I know He loves me. I know He loves all of us, whether or not we believe in Him. And I know that He will always listen and that He wants what is best for us. And I know that He sent His Son to die for us, so that we can return to live with Him. He will never, ever, ever turn away from you—He is always waiting for you to turn to Him. Whether that be again or for the first time, He is waiting for you because He loves you very, very much. 

He is with me and He loves me no matter what.

So, I'm naturally a musical person. I love to sing and I love to play the violin. And I love musical movies. You know, like Tangled, Frozen, The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, etc. And I love to sing along with the movies and recite my favorite lines. Well, my brothers find it annoying that I do that. Well guess what brothers? I don't care—I'll do it anyway, whether or not they like it because it's not harming anyone. But when I say something—that either took me a little while to get or understand, or I didn't think and just said it—my brother always implies that I'm stupid. And I don't like that. I hate it, actually, because he does it to everyone and it's annoying and rude. I'm not stupid—neither are any of my other siblings—but he always implies that we are. And that's just so rude. We're a family and we are supposed to be kind to each other. Sometimes I have a hard time with remembering to be patient and kind, but I know when not to cross the line into "Uh-oh, this is the mean, rude, I'm-going-to-hurt-someone" territory. But my little brothers sometimes don't. And so I'm trying to help teach them to be kind. 

So, I'm also naturally an optimistic and happy person—this annoys some of my siblings; again, I don't care—and I am trying to be the peacemaker between my siblings. Sometimes it doesn't work. But I try it anyway. I am trying to teach Tyler (and sometimes Conner)—because they forget—that the little boys are only little and they do not understand that the little boys are still growing and learning!

This next school year is going to be my senior year of high school and I'm feeling a mix of emotions. I'm excited to be going to school and I'm excited to be finished. I'm also sad—I don't want summer to end and I don't want my last year to be over. I'm excited for the future, but also scared. I'm also scared for summer to end and for school to start. Really, my emotions can be boiled down to two: excited and scared. But guess what??

Did you guess? Okay, here's the real answer:

No matter what I'm going through in life—family matters, school matters, friendship matters—I can always count on my Savior and I can always turn to Him. I can always depend on His gospel to help me answer my questions and get through life. I am so grateful for His Atonement and I am so grateful that He listens to me and helps me when I need it. I have learned that He knows and loves me and He sends blessings my way when I need them, even if I don't know that I need them. He will always love me—no matter what—and He will always send me help. He is always right beside me and knows the path ahead of me even though I can't see it. He is always with me. And I am so grateful that He will never leave me alone because I don't know what I would do without His hand in my life. 

Finding strength in the storm.

You know when it gets windy and almost rainy and you are told to clean up toys and stuff outside so they don't get wet? I've always been afraid that things will fly away or get blown away when the wind picks up; I don't know why. So I always picked up stuff or put it inside or whatever needed to be done. And I think that life is sometimes like that. We're afraid that some things—testimonies or friendships—will "fly" or "get blown" away and so we try to cling onto them and protect them as much as possible. And yes, sometimes that's the answer to what we can/need to do. But really we just need to strengthen the bonds. We need to strengthen our testimonies so that when the winds of the adversary blow our way, we don't need to be worried. We can pack it up and protect it, but it has been strengthened and we don't need to worry. We need to strengthen our friendships so that when it is questioned, we can say that "yes, we are friends, and no, I will not leave them behind." In order to strengthen our testimonies, we need to put our trust in the Savior. We need to come closer to Him and we need to rely on Him. He will help when the storm blows our way. In a way, this will help us strengthen our friendships, too. Becoming closer to and more like Christ can give us the confidence that we may need to better the bonds of friendship that may be weakening. By Him and through Him, all things are possible. So when life gets stormy, you can find strength in Christ. 

Emulating His example.

Today in Young Women's we talked about how to emulate Jesus Christ's example. Jesus Christ was the only perfect being to ever walk the earth. He never judged people and He was so kind to everyone. We were given a picture of Christ with this scripture on it: "There is no other name given whereby salvation cometh; therefore, I would that ye should take upon you the name of Christ" (Mosiah 5:8). When we were baptized, we promised to take upon us His name and to mourn with those that mourn, comfort those in need of comfort, and stand as witnesses of God at all times, in all things and all places. Every day, I am trying to be more like Jesus. I'm trying to love as He did, and I'm trying to be as patient as He was. I'm trying to do everything I can to be like Him so I can return to my Heavenly Father. 

The Golden Rule.

Okay, the Golden Rule is do unto others as you would have them do unto you, right? Right. Let me talk here for a second. I'm sick of the world. Wait, wait, wait...hear me out. I'm tired of people being rude and inconsiderate and judgemental. People just don't listen or respect each other's religions or beliefs or ideas. People are always bashing on other people's religions as if they know exactly what it's about and what its focus is when usually they don't. And I find that just absolutely rude! It makes me sad that our world has come to this. People just need to:

1) Respect each other. Respect their beliefs. Respect their faiths. Respect them as a person. This is being kind. 

2) Respect that people have different ideas. Different ideas are okay. 

3) Respect that people are sometimes wrong—even if they don't know it—and that they can have their own opinions. Respect them when you need to correct them. This is being considerate. 

4) Respect people as you want to be respected. 

I feel that if the whole world was more respectful, life would be a lot easier and the world would be a kinder place to live. I just don't understand why people are so rude to each other. It breaks my heart to see people be rude to each other and disrespectful—my heart aches for all of them—but they have their agency and I have mine. If it hurts my heart so much, how much more does it hurt our Heavenly Father's? He loves us more than anything in the world; how does He feel when we treat each other like garbage? I feel like some people are just rude and mean because they are bullies and they like making fun of people and making them cry and making them sad. But why would you do that? You don't like it when people do that to you, do you? No? So then why do it to others? I just don't understand.

People are entitled to their own views, but I just don't understand why some people have to bash other people's faiths, ideas, etc. It makes them HAPPY! If someone wants to be a Muslim, let them. If someone wants to be LDS (Mormon), let them. If someone wants to be atheist, let them. If someone wants to be Catholic, LET THEM. It's not hurting you, is it? No. It's not hurting them, either, is it? No. So then why bother arguing about it, or making mean and rude comments about their religion and beliefs, or making mean and rude comments about them? You wouldn't, that's why. Yet some people do. 

We all make mistakes—this is the truth. Sorry if you thought some of us were perfect. None of us are. But we can become perfect. Through our Savior, Jesus Christ—who was perfect—we can become like Him and like our Heavenly Father. I am not perfect—far from it—but I am trying my best every day to become more Christlike. Following the Golden Rule is one way. Being more loving is another. Being respectful. Showing love. Being kind. Treating people how you want to be treated.

Jesus' example of following the Golden Rule is so heartbreaking but He wanted to do it for us. He wanted us to come back and live with Heavenly Father. Here is what the Jews did to Him (not in any specific order):

-They placed a crown of thorns on His head (St Matthew 27:29; St Mark 15:17; St John 19:2). 

-They spit on Him (St Matthew 27:30; St Mark 15:19). 

-They smote Him (St Luke 22:63-64; St John 19:3; St John 19:3). 

-They smote Him with a reed (St Matthew 27:30; St Mark 15:19). 

-They mocked Him (St Matthew 27:29; St Mark 15:18-19; St Luke 22:64; 23:36; St John 19:3).

-They gave Him vinegar and gall to drink (St Matthew 27:34). 

-They nailed Him to a cross and crucified Him (St Matthew 27:35; St Mark 15:24; St Luke 23:33; St John 19:16-18). 

https://www.lds.org/bible-videos/jesus-is-scourged-and-crucified?lang=eng

What did Jesus do to stop them? In each of the accounts in Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, He did nothing. He was the Son of God and He had the power to smite them from the face of the earth, yet He did not. He did not say a word. While He was up on the cross, He said, speaking to Heavenly Father, "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do" (St Luke 23:34). They did all those awful, awful things to Him—one of their own—and He asked Heavenly Father to forgive them. If that is not following the Golden Rule, I don't know what is. I love my Savior with all of my heart and I am trying to be like Him more and more every day. I hope that people will come to know Him through me, because if that happens, then I am truly becoming more like Christ.  

Missionaries.

This summer, I've seen a lot of friends' mission farewells and I have a couple more later this summer. And I'm sad that they're leaving, but I know that they will be great missionaries. I know that they are well-prepared and that they will love and serve the people in the places they've been called to. Missionary work is a great part of our gospel. I'm grateful for all the missionaries who have sacrificed their time to serve The Lord by sharing His gospel. I know that they are blessed and that The Lord prepares people to hear the message of the gospel—sometimes from specific people. D&C 31: 3 "Lift up your heart and rejoice, for the hour of your mission is come; and your tongue shall be loosed, and you shall declare glad tidings of great joy unto this generation." I know that my friends will be blessed in the mission field and later in life because of their service. I still am not sure if I want to serve a mission yet, but I know I've got some great examples to look up to if I decide to go. 

Singing, dancing, and little girls.

Okay, so this week I had the opportunity to serve a lady in my stake by helping her with her summer singing camp. It was a blessing to her and I am glad I was able to help her. I got to know each of the girls and they were all so cute and sweet. It was fun to watch them all learn the dances and songs; they did it in four days!! And they performed for their parents today. The theme of the show was "shine" and it was fun to be able to help the girls learn how to shine. I am so blessed that I was also able to learn how to shine this week, and that I was able to help the sister in my stake. It was a fantastic week and I'm glad that I was able to meet each of the girls. The littler girls were absolutely adorable and they were all so, so sweet. Service works both ways: it helps the person you are serving, but it also helps you become a better and more Christlike person. 

"Peace be unto you."

I think that there are a lot of different ways to be at peace or for it to be peaceful. Peace is "freedom from disturbance; quiet and tranquility; mental calm; serenity". I think peace is a state of mind and part of your attitude. But peace can also be given to you. It is a blessing from our Heavenly Father. In John 14 verse 27, it says, "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." Jesus is saying that He gives us peace, but we have to be open to it; we have to open our hearts, which is like I was saying, that it's an attitude/state of mind. In Helaman 5 verse 47, it says, "Peace, peace be into you, because of your faith in my Well Beloved, who was from the foundation of the world." This is Heavenly Father, and He is blessing the Nephites because of their faith in His son, Jesus Christ. Peace can be a blessing: if you're doing the right things and believing in Jesus Christ; or peace can be a state of mind and part of your attitude. True to the Faith says "You work for peace when keep the commandments, give service, care for family members and neighbkrs, and share the gospel. You work for peace whenever you help relieve the suffering of another." You can have peace when you are alone and all is quiet. You can even have peace when it is noisy and boisterous all around you! Just today, my brothers were playing barricade in the toy room, and they were being loud and probably hurting each other—which usually results in my interference—but I let them be and I was at peace. Today I have been at peace quite a lot, which is strange because today has been a bit hectic, but I know that Heavenly Father blessed me with patience, compassion, and a desire in my heart for peace, which led to me feeling at peace today. I'm going to try and have peace in my heart and be compassionate and soft-spoken this week. I will make mistakes, I know—I already made some today—but I want to be better about having peace and being peaceful. It's made me happier today. 

Rain.

Life's like rain. Sometimes there's none, but then slowly, drip by drip and drop by drop, it becomes a downpour and you get soaked. Now, don't get me wrong: I love dancing in the rain and getting soaked. But when life gets super busy, sometimes I have a hard time with it. But no matter the weather, Jesus Christ is always there for me when I need Him. So if a downpour of life gets too busy for me, I can turn to Him and He will help me. If a sprinkling of life gets too much for me, He will help me. If no life is too much for me, He will help me. No matter the weather, He will help me through it. 

Patience and love.

I am constantly having to work on my patience. It's something I struggle with. Because I have eight younger siblings—most of whom don't listen to me at times—it's something I need to work on. Four of my brothers are only little, and I need to be more patient with them. Two of them are a little bigger but they know better and sometimes I get frustrated because they don't do what they're supposed to or they don't listen, but I still need to be more patient. My sisters are older than most of the boys: one is rebellious at times and the other is not yet a teen, but I still need to be patient. Patience is something I struggle with sometimes, but most especially at home. I need to learn to be like Jesus and love my siblings. I need to be patient, and kind, and caring. There may be some days that are better than others and some may be worse. I just need to remember that:

1) Heavenly Father loves me with all my flaws, and He also loves my siblings with all of theirs. 

2) Heavenly Father must be the king of patience because He works with imperfect people all day long, including me. 

So, because Heavenly Father loves me and works with me all day, I need to learn patience and love my siblings, even with their imperfections. Even if they think I'm annoying because of what I do, I need to be kinder and step up and be the big sister and the good example. Even if they don't listen to me, I still need to be there for them. I need to let them know that I will always love them. I need to let them know that they can come to me at ANY time for ANY thing and I will not judge. And I can start by being patient. 

Becoming a little bit more like Christ.

You know those stories you read when you were younger that had amazing life lessons? My favorites have always been the ones by Max Lucado. He wrote Because I Love You and all the ones about the Wemmicks. I love those stories because they are exactly how life is. We as people are a curious people, and sometimes a vain people. But God knows how to handle us, and has prepared a way to save us. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can again become whole and start anew. We can try each day to be a little bit better than the day before. I know it's not always easy—believe me, I have a very hard time sometimes—but I know that with His help, and by and through His grace, we can all become a little bit better, a little bit kinder, and a little bit more like Christ. And, at the end of the day, isn't that our goal?

Love, happiness, and service.

I decided to write about several things today when I found a quote by President David O. McKay, which says, "True happiness comes only by making others happy." And I love this quote. It reminds me of the scripture "When ye are in the service of your fellow beings, ye are only in the service of your God" (Mosiah 2:17, I believe). And in order to be happy, and full of love, you have to make others happy because that's the best thing. When I'm babysitting and the kids aren't happy, I do my best to try and make them happy, because, like the saying "when mom isn't happy, no one is", "when the kids aren't happy, no one is". Everyone is just miserable. But when everyone is happy, everything is just fine. Love, happiness, and service go hand in hand. Life is just better all around when everyone is happy. 

Influence.

Youth conference (June 11-13, 2014) was amazing! I learned a lot about my Savior and I grew closer to Him. It was an amazing experience. 

Today is Father's Day. I'm so thankful for my daddy, and my grandpas and all the men that have influenced my life for good. Like my great-grandpa Harker. He died a couple years ago, but I still remember him. 

People may leave us for a time--or for ever--but they will always stay with us in our hearts. They may never know the influence they had on our lives. And even though people leave, we are never alone, because Jesus Christ is always with us. 

Girls' Camp.

Last week was girls' camp. I had an AMAZING time!! I absolutely loved hanging out with all of the girls and our leaders. I learned a lot from all of them and I'm sure they learned something from me. I love them all very much and I'm glad I was able to go. Our theme was The Wizard of Oz and so we learned about love, courage, and knowledge throughout the week. One amazing thing that happened that really touched me was at the ropes course. We did the zip line first on Wednesday, which was also the day that we learned about courage. Every single one of the girls went. Even the girl who was quite determined not to go. She was so, so scared. But she did it; after another of the girls went first to show her it wasn't scary or hard (and she, too, was scared to do it. She froze up the last time she'd tried), she did it. She didn't like it, she said, and it was scary, but she did it. We were all so, so proud of both of them because they faced their fears and did it anyway. I love girls' camp with all of my heart. It's an amazing experience every time and I love it. I always learn and grow and I always gain a testimony or strengthen my testimony of the gospel or certain aspects of the gospel. And I always make new friends and strengthen friendships. Girls' camp is one of the highlights of my summer, and I will never, ever forget them. 

For good.

In our lives, we meet certain people who help us become who we need to be. They help us for better. We learn things from them that we couldn't learn from anyone else. And sometimes we teach without knowing. Like, this year, for instance. I'd met *Jane before, in one of my classes in ninth grade, but I can't remember if she transferred out second semester or not. Anyway, this year she was in my seminary class, both semesters. That rarely happens, where I have seminary with someone full year (because we've got so many teachers and students, it's hard to keep classes the same). And Jane thanked me at the end of second semester, because I'd been there the whole year and she had learned a lot from me. I didn't even know that I had that much of an influence on her. I was just being myself. She's a sweet girl and I'm glad I was able to help her. Also, on the flipside, several people in my seminary class and other classes helped me out just by being themselves and a good example to me. But that just shows how life is: God puts people in our paths to help us learn and grow, even if they have absolutely no idea. 

A really good example of this is the song For Good from Wicked:

I've heard it said

That people come into our lives

For a reason

Bringing something we must learn 

And we are led to those who help us most to grow

If we let them

And we help them in return

Well I don't know if I believe that's true

But I know I'm who I am today

Because I knew you

...

And, because I knew you

Because I knew you

I have been changed

For good

*Name has been changed

Fitting in. Or not.

I love this quote! It's comforting to me. I don't fit in sometimes because I wasn't meant to. The Lord has a plan for me and He's guiding me through it. I also know that I'm never alone, even if I am literally or figuratively. He is always there to comfort me. 

Faith, hope, and charity.

Today in seminary we talked about Moroni 7. In the first verse it says "And now I, Moroni, write a few of the words of my father Mormon, which he spake concerning faith, hope, and charity" and I underlined faith, hope, and charity, because that is what the whole chapter is about. It is what the gospel is about: how we need to have faith in Jesus Christ, and hope that we can make the world a better place using charity, which is the pure love of Christ. 

Stand in holy places.

I was listening to a song, entitled "Stand in Holy Places", that our Young Women's group sang last year, and it's been over a year since we sang it, but as I was listening to the beginning intro I remembered it! And I sang the song along with the track. And part of the lyrics just hit me: "The Lord is coming quickly; we're preparing for His reign; we'll keep our lives sacred as we stand in holy places". And it was a great reminder to me that He is coming, and soon. So we need to stand in holy places, and keep our lives sacred so that we'll be ready when He comes again. 

I feel my Saviour's love for me.

I feel my Saviour's love for me through other people, especially my mom and all the women in my life that I look up to. Through their examples, and the love that they have for me, I feel my Saviour's love. Just like the primary song, "I feel my Saviour's love In all the world around me His Spirit warms my soul Through everything I see He knows I will follow Him Give all my life to Him," I am able to feel His love for me as I walk through the world, and as I follow the example of the women that I look up to. I love that Heavenly Father knows exactly how to help me feel His love. 

Forgiveness.

I can always be forgiven. No matter what I do, or how far I stray. It may take time for me to heal, but I can be forgive. The same is true for you. You can always be forgiven, no matter what you do. It may take time for you to heal, but you can be forgiven. Heavenly Father wants you to find and come to Him or to come back to Him. He is filled with so much mercy and love and gives second chances to us all the time because He wants us all to return home to Him. 

Stay.

I'm listening to a song called "Stay" by Jenny Phillips. Here are the lyrics:

I stand in wonder

At what thou hast done for me

Nothing could ever

Be as sweet

As Thy mercy

As Thy love

As Thy peace

[Chorus]

My soul breathes

I feel hope beat

I'm so alive

When thy spirit fills me

I want this feeling with me

Stay, stay

Help me live in a way

That Thy spirit can stay with me

Sure as the sunrise

As pure as the falling snow

Like leaves that are dancing

In the autumn breeze

Like blue skies

Like laughter

Like new life

[Chorus (x2)]

My soul breathes

I feel hope beat

I'm so alive

When thy spirit fills me

I want this feeling with me

Stay, stay

Help me live in a way

That Thy spirit can stay with me

I love this song, especially the chorus. It's saying that My soul breathes, I feel hope, and I'm so alive when I feel His spirit, and then asking Him to "Help me live in a way that Thy spirit can stay with me." In D&C 25:12 it says "For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me" and this song is a perfect example of this because in the song she's asking Him to help her live in a way that His spirit can stay with her because she loves the feeling she gets when she feels it. I, too, love the feeling that His spirit gives me, and I hope and pray every day that I can live in a way that His spirit can stay and influence me. Because He loves me, I feel His love constantly through His spirit and I feel His mercy through the spirit that acts of kindness or thoughtfulness of others gives me. He is constantly showing me how much He loves me, and I hope and I pray that every day I can feel His spirit so that I can help others feel His love and mercy. 

Because of Him.

I know He lives! I know that because of Him we can live again. And I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that because of Him, I am NEVER alone. He will always send people when they are needed because He knows what we are feeling and doesn't want us to be or feel alone. 

I'm trying to be like Jesus.

🎶 I'm trying to be like Jesus; I'm following in His ways. I'm trying to love as He did in all that I do and say. At times I am tempted to make a wrong choice, but I try to listen as the still small voice whispers: Love one another as Jesus loves you. Try to show kindness in all that you do. Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought for these are the things Jesus taught. 🎶

Hello! I have this song stuck in my head for some reason, so I thought maybe someone needed it so I decided to put it on my blog. Try to remember that Jesus loves you no matter what, but it makes Him happy when you're choosing the right and when you're trying to be like Him. 

Because of Him, all things are possible.

Happy Easter! What a beautiful time to celebrate the resurrection of our Savior. I know He lives. He was crucified on Calvary and He was buried in a tomb and laid there for three days. On the third day--Sunday--He rose. Because of Him, we can live again. Because of Him, all things are possible. Because of Him, we never have to suffer alone. 

Come Unto Christ.

"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you" ~Matthew 7:7

This scripture reminds me of this year's mutual theme: Come Unto Christ and Be Perfected in Him. If you just put forth the effort to ask, and seek, and knock, Heavenly Father will answer, and help you find, and open the door. Christ is waiting with arms wide open; you just have to come unto Him and ask. 

April Conference.

Conference was so good! I had a couple of questions that I received some answers for. Here are some of my favorite quotes:

So glad I was able to watch conference last week! I know The Lord answered my prayers and questions with some of the talks that were given. 

Change.

Change is something that will always be happening. Maybe you married someone and your life will never be the same again. Maybe someone who was always a constant in your life is now gone from your life or farther away. Maybe you have a new addition to your family. Maybe a lot of your friends are going off to college. Whether for better or for worse, change will always be a constant thing in our lives. But you know one person who will never change? They'll always be there and they'll always be the same? Jesus Christ. He is always there and He will always be the same. He will always be there to hold your hand through tough times or pick you up if it gets too rough. He will always be there. He will always be there when you're scared for a good change that will really mess with your world. He will always be there when you're sad and frightened. He will never leave you alone. He will always be there and He will send people--angels--to be His helping hands. Maybe that girl down the street that you just waved to or said "hi" to needed someone to be friendly. Maybe that compliment you gave your best friend lifted them up to be able to get through the day. Maybe that compliment you received helped lift you up. Maybe that hug or smile you received gave you hope. You never know who Heavenly Father sends you to to be their angel, or who He sends to you to be your angel. No matter the story, no matter the person, no matter the ending, He will never leave you, nor forsake you. He will always be a constant thing in your life and He will never change. 

Heavenly Father knows what you need.

I'm so glad that my Heavenly Father knows exactly what I need even when I don't! Tonight was the General Women's Meeting and it was absolutely fabulous! I'm so glad I got to watch. Sometimes you don't know you have a question until you hear the answer. I heard lots of things that I just needed to hear. So thankful my Heavenly Father knows me so well!! :)

Faith.

"Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore if ye have faith ye hope for things which are not seen, which are true." ~~Alma 32:21

Sometimes a little faith is all you need to know that The Lord will help you get throught that day or that hard time. He is always there to help. 

Miracles and tender mercies.

Okay, I had a miracle happen this week. I had to take a president's test for history and I had to memorize lots of people, parties, and facts. It was the last week of term, and I had to have the test taken by Friday, or yesterday. I studied my heart out all last weekend and all this week until Thursday because Friday after school I was originally supposed to have auditions for chamber orchestra that day after school, so I couldn't take the test on Friday--also I didn't want to take it on Friday because if I failed I'd have to take it again right after and that would be no fun. Anyway. I took the test on Thursday, and I thought I did okay--fabulous on the first part, and a little iffy on the last part--which I hadn't fully memorized, so shh...I worried about it all day, studied a little more during orchestra because Mrs. Kelley told me to, and just kind of flew through the day, not knowing what was going to happen because chamber auditions had been changed to the 31st, so I couldn't tell if Life liked me or if it was going to hate me by the end of day and I'd have to take the test again. Thankfully, I passed! I know I wouldn't have been able to do it without my Heavenly Father's help, or my sister's--she helped me study. I know that The Lord blessed me to be able to memorize all that I needed to in a week, and to remember some random stuff from my four years of honors history. It was such a tender mercy and I'm so thankful for His hand in my life.

He will never leave.

If The Lord brought you to it, He will bring you through it because you are good enough and He does care. He will never leave you nor forsake you. That is not the kind of God He is. He won't just leave you in the times that you need Him most. He's not going to say, "Oh, it's a trial/troubled time for him/her right now. Time to let them deal with it on their own." No. That's not the kind of God I worship. That's not what He does. He is ALWAYS there, whether or not you feel Him, or know Him, or recognise Him. He is there. He is there, waiting for you to turn to Him. 

He is always with you.

Heavenly Father is always with you. Through thick and thin, He is there. When you are sick, He is there. When you are lost, He is there. When you are sad or lonely, He is there. When you need comfort, He is there. There is never a moment when He is not with you, even if you don't know it or feel Him there. I know this without a shadow of a doubt, because I have felt Him. He has been there for me when I have needed Him. He has been my rock, and without Him I could not have done it all. I am so thankful for all that He has done for me.

How have I held it all together?

I have had a really rough past couple of days/weeks/months, and today was especially hard. I got up, still feeling kind of sick. I had had a little "me" time last night; I went to a concert and I really enjoyed myself; I got to let go of everything and just listen and watch and enjoy. Anyway, this morning I was feeling kind of ill still and I went to ask my mom about something; I think I asked if daddy could give me a blessing. It was, you know, five o'clock in the morning, so she just told me to take some Tylenol and put the heating pad on my stomach and wait for a while. So, I took the Tylenol and went to lay down. For the next hour or so, I lay in my bed, pain running through my abdomen. I tried everything: I tried putting the heating pad in different places on my tummy; I tried holding it differently; I tried holding it against my tummy as I lay on my tummy; I tried holding it on my tummy as I lay on my back. The pain was just so, so bad I curled up in a ball and held the heating pad against my stomach and cried. I cried to my Heavenly Father; I cried for my daddy; I cried for my mom. I just wanted relief. I finally just told myself to get up; I counted to three and got up. I thought it would make me feel better if I got moving; I had, after all, been sitting--nay, laying--on my bed curled up in pain for almost two hours. So, I decided that I was going to wear a dress today because I was taking the ACT and I really don't know why but for some reason dressing up helps me think better or relax or something. Anyway, I head into the bathroom and I get dizzy and woozy and I head over to the toilet, hoping and praying that I wouldn't throw up. I did; I started sobbing, heaving, heavy sobs. More heavy than when I had been in bed. My brother went and got my dad, who went and got my mom because he was taking my brother to school. I stood up, brushed my teeth, and I felt better; I honestly felt better and I thought that I could go about my day. I still felt sick but I felt loads better. I got dressed and went into the kitchen; I didn't really want to eat anything; my mom told me I could have some sprite or some yogurt. I had some sprite but I didn't really eat any of the yogurt because I just didn't feel too good. I went to brush my teeth again and I started to brush my tongue for whatever reason. Big mistake. I started to throw up, in the sink. I quickly walked over to the toilet, but I started crying again because once you can kind of overlook, but twice? Nuh-uh, that's a sure sign of "stay home". My mom called the school and was told that me not going wouldn't harm anything; it was just a missed opportunity to take the ACT. My mom left it up to me. I was really, really sick (I had just thrown up twice, for Pete's sake) and tired, and I just wanted to sleep, but I decided to take the test. My dad gave me a blessing before he took me to school, and I prayed and prayed in my heart as we drove to school and all throughout the test. There was a couple of times where I thought "Oh, no, this is it" and I was sure I was going to throw up, but I took deep breaths, in and out, and I got through it. I drank lots of water and I finished (mostly) that stupid, stupid timed test without throwing up. I owe it all to my Heavenly Father. Without Him, I probably would have thrown up that first time. I prayed; I prayed really, really hard that I wouldn't throw up. I took deep breaths and I PRAYED, and it was answered. I am still feeling sick, but I am going to see the doctor on Monday and maybe we will be able to find out what is wrong with me. This pain is unlike any pain I have ever felt before, but I don't have to go through it alone. My Savior suffered for this pain of mine, and He has felt it, too. I can turn to Him for comfort and relief, and that is exactly what I have been doing today (when I wasn't sleeping). I don't know how I have held it all together. Actually, I do; I haven't. It's as simple as that. I haven't held it all together. I have had to turn to, rely on, and trust in my Savior and my Heavenly Father too many times to count in the past couple of months. My testimony of this gospel, of my Savior, and of the power of the Atonement has grown tenfold. There is absolutely NO way at ALL that I would have EVER been able to get through everything that I have gotten through without the help of my Savior. I love Him with all of my heart and I am so thankful that my daddy holds the priesthood worthily and is able to give me blessings when I want or need them. So, again, in answer to my question "How have I held it all together", the truth is, I haven't. My Savior has been there EVERY step of the way, and He has lifted me when I could not carry on. He is my rock, and my foundation, and I love Him. He has been my glue; He is piecing me back together from what I was to what I need to become. I trust Him with all of my heart. I am so glad He knows what He is doing.

Pray even if He's already answered you.

Pray to God even after He gives you what you were praying for. He always wants to hear you speak to Him, no matter what is going on in your life. He will always listen and He will always hear you. 

Music is a prayer.

"For my soul delighteth in the song of the heart; yea, the song of the righteous is a prayer unto me" ~D&C 25:12.

This is one of my favorite scriptures because I love music. I am glad when I get to share my musical talents with others because if I can feel the Spirit when I perform them, how much more can those I share the music with feel the Spirit? Music is just how I speak, and I'm glad that it is a prayer to my Heavenly Father.