One thing at a time.

I am happy to say that my cold is slowly disappearing!! Today I have felt the most amazing I have felt in the last three weeks!! I'm so blessed, too, because today I was singing in sacrament meeting, so I needed my voice at its utmost best today. And the musical number was absolutely beautiful!! We sang "If The Savior Stood Beside Me" and I am soo grateful for my friends who accompanied me on the piano and flute! It was a wonderful experience and it really brought the Spirit.

Yesterday, my aunt and uncle were able to be sealed to their newly adopted daughter, and I was lucky enough to be able to go. It was such a beautiful experience and I am so glad that I got to be there. It was a special experience.

During sacrament meeting, the speakers talked about challenges. One speaker said that God teaches us during small challenges to help us during bigger challenges. I really liked this. Because it is really true. He teaches us line upon line, precept on precept. And it only makes sense that He teaches us during small challenges how to deal with our bigger challenges.

For example, I recently FINALLY have almost finishing getting over biting my nails!! I've been working on this for YEARS! And only in the last few weeks have I super focused on my goal, and made it work! I don't know why it has taken me so long, and of course, I'm going to have to focus on it really hard if I want to make sure that I don't bite my nails again, but I'm sure that I can do it. For the first time in a long time, I actually have nails, and I am SO determined to keep them.

Anyway, looking back at my experience with biting my nails, I can learn lots of things. One thing I have learned is that sometimes you just have to keep. trying. I have tried so many things over the years, and they haven't always worked. So many times, I have wanted to give up. Sometimes, I did. I thought, "This is too hard. This is impossible. I can't do it." And I stopped for a time. And then I would want to try again. And it was a giant roller coaster of ups and downs. I kept going, kept trying.

As I have thought about this, I've decided that this can apply to many things in life, and I want to try to apply it in my life better. Right now, I am struggling at work. I think it's because I have had a lot of influx and outflow of children in my classroom, and so they dynamic of my room has been changing every week, so the kids are probably going a little nuts. Frankly, I understand where they're coming from. I also am going a little nuts. It has been a crazy couple of weeks, and I am not sure how the next couple of weeks are going to go, but I am certain that as I focus on one thing at a time, and as I focus on making sure that my kiddos understand that I love them, I think that the next few weeks will be better.

I know that I can't do this alone. I think one thing that has made it difficult these last few weeks is that I haven't exactly been asking for as much help as I've needed. I'm going to try better this week to improve at asking for help when I need it–and even before I need it.

One of the speakers in sacrament meeting today shared this quote, and I needed its reminder today. Honestly, these last few weeks, I have wanted to quit my job. It has been way hard and very taxing on my body & soul. I have thought that I can't do this and that I'm not cut out for it. But I have kept going because I don't have anything else to do right now. My friend this weekend told me that I can do this! She believes in me, and she thinks I am cut out for this. She said it gets easier with time, and I hope she's right (she is). I just need to remember to focus on one thing at a time. Which is really how I have been getting over biting my nails–one nail at a time. Who knew such a small trial would impact how I get through much bigger trials? God sure did. I'm glad that He is on my side because with Him, I will not become lost. 

Have a wonderful week! God loves you, and so do I! 

Xoxo

Mattie

God always gives us blessings–especially when we're sick.

What a week this has been! I have been sick with a cold, and it has made me extremely tired all week! But I have been able to see God's hand in my life every day this week. I was able to wake up early enough every morning to get to work on time, and I've been able to drink lots of water this week. I've been taking some medicine randomly, but this week I'm going to try to take it more routinely and help my body kick this sickness!

In other news, I've been learning and growing a lot this week at work. I had to be more patient than normal (because sick Mattie apparently canNOT deal with things that make her impatient), and I had to work all week through my cold and headaches that occurred nearly every day. The worst part is that every other day was good, and every other day was bad. So some days I felt like I was getting better, and then other days I was almost worse than I was before. It has been a tough week. I think that I was able to rein in my emotions this week, so my kids didn't really notice anything off about me, which is good.

I was thinking about the story of the Prodigal Son in the New Testament earlier this week, and it reminded me of something my New Testament professor this last year said. He said that it should really be called the story of the Prodigal Sons because the son that stayed home also was a little lost. When his brother came back, he was jealous of all the attention he was getting, and of the party that his father threw for him just because he came home. I made a post on my Facebook page for this blog about it, and you can find that link here.

I am really grateful that I was able to make it through this week. I'm grateful for the love and peace I've felt from my Father in Heaven, and from some of my friends. Despite my sickness, and the headaches and such, this week was pretty good, and full of happiness. As I listened to conference talks and read my scriptures, I felt like the Lord was proud of me, and that I am where I am supposed to be, doing what I am supposed to be doing.

I am hoping that I will be feeling better by the end of this week, because I don't want to spend the whole season sick!

I'm grateful for the power of the priesthood, and that my dad is always willing to give me a blessing. I am grateful for my family, and for the love and support that they give me, and for the fun times that we have together. I am grateful for my friends, and for their love and support, and I am grateful for my Heavenly Father, and for His love. I am grateful for my Savior, and for His love and sacrifice. I am grateful that He was willing to sacrifice His life so that we could return to live with our Father in Heaven someday.

Sorry this week's post is so short! I am just very tired and need to go rest some more! I hope that everyone has an amazing week this week!! I love you and am praying for you!!

Xoxo
Mattie

Keeping an eternal perspective.

Today in sacrament meeting, the speakers talked about keeping an eternal perspective. I thought they had some really great messages.

One of the ways to help us keep an eternal perspective is that we have to remember who we are. We are children of God, and He loves us.

Another way is to keep the Holy Ghost with us. In a quote read by the first speaker, Sister Sheri Dew said, "Our challenge is not one of getting the Lord to speak to us. Our problem is hearing what He has to say. He has promised, “As often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit” (D&C 6:14)." We must be confident in our first promptings from the Holy Ghost.

God's plan for us is often fluid, and can be an adventure. Sometimes we can be confident that God wants us heading in one direction, and then later He can be directing us down a different path in a different direction. But He doesn't tell us all the answers every time.

The third way is to remember that it's a doubles match. God is in our court. We are supported by Him, and He will help us as we move forward.

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Asking "why" never takes away the hard things. Life gets crazy. Sometimes God calms the seas, and sometimes He calms the sailor.

In the talk "Accepting the Lord's Will and Timing", Elder Bednar said he asked Elder Neal A. Maxwell what lessons he learned through his illness (he had leukemia) and he said, “I have learned that not shrinking is more important than surviving.” Just as Jesus shrank not to drink the bitter cup, we, too, can shrink not to drink the bitter cup. It's like taking medicine–it tastes terrible, but you need to take it in order to get better. We need to "drink the bitter cup" and stand tall. God is with us, and He will help us through it all.

"Trial" in the medical world has a positive connotation. As you go through trials, you are getting closer and closer to the answers. "Clinical trials are research studies that test how well new medical approaches work in people. Each study answers scientific questions and tries to find better ways to prevent, screen for, diagnose, or treat a disease." Trials that we go through in our lives are testing that helps us develop our faith and testimony. The variety of experiences and challenges that we go through is for our growth. Living the Gospel gives us the support and understanding we need to get through this life. 

I hope you all have a wonderful week! God loves you! 

Xoxo

Mattie

Thy will be done.

Yesterday was the five-year anniversary of the death of one of my dear friends. It never gets easier. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was in high school, I was sad the whole day, and I have the greatest friends who just hugged me and let me cry. I had literally just gone to see her the previous Monday because it was Labor day and I just wanted to see her. I just spent 15 or 20 minutes with her, and I didn't really speak until the last few minutes as I told her a little about my life and then said "I love you" and "Goodbye" but oh, how I could feel her spirit, and the Spirit of the Lord!!

She was such an amazing example to me of Christlike love, and of a Christlike heart and spirit. Some days it doesn't seem real that she is gone, but she is. I am grateful for the time I had with her, and for the love she gave me, and for the happiness that she brought to the world, and to my life. She had the biggest heart and loved so much!! I still feel her every so often in life.

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This week is going to be a little crazy–I've got a lot going on–but I know that God blesses us as we put Him first, so this week I am going to do my best to put Him first, no matter what. It might be challenging, but challenges lead to growth, and that is what we are here for–to learn and grow. 

I am so blessed to be where I am right now. It might be a little stressful and overwhelming at times, but I know that God is with me and He knows who and what I need in my life. No one is perfect but they can be perfectly what I need. 

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"Thy will be done." This is a hard thing for me to accept sometimes, and I know that we all struggle with it at times. Today I was thinking during the sacrament about what kinds of things I can do to help me accept the Lord's will. One thing that I was thinking about was that as we recognize the Lord's hand in not only our life, but in the lives of those around us, we can come to see that He has a plan for each of us. He has a timeline for all of us that leads to our learning and growth. 

As we live our lives and move forward, making decisions and choices according to what we desire, and according to what the Lord would have us do, we can come to see that His will is greater than ours, and that we can come to know and understand some parts of His plan for us. This can help us to begin to try to accept those parts of His plan that we do not always understand. 

Sometimes I don't understand my path, or my weaknesses. I don't understand how they have helped me or will help me grow. And that's okay. It took me a long time to realize that. It's okay not to know why. As long as I know that my Savior is there for me, and that I am here on this Earth to help love His sheep–Heavenly Father's children–and that I am here to help increase the love in the world, I know that He will help me. As I study my scriptures, my patriarchal blessing, the talks of our Church leaders, and visit the temple, I know that the Lord will help me understand what He needs me to do. 

Life is challenging–sometimes it's more challenging than other times–but I know that God is always with me, and I know that He has a plan to help me learn and grow. 

I know that I am where I need to be right now, and I know that I am being stretched in many ways. I know that I am growing and I know that I am becoming someone who my Heavenly Father can be proud of. 

I hope you all have a great week! Know that I pray for you every day and you are always in my heart and in my thoughts! God loves you and I love you! 

Xoxo

Mattie

There is no end to second chances.

Each and every day is different. So the person I am each and every day needs to be different. I need to be able to adapt to the changes and challenges of the day. I can do so with the help of my Savior. If I fail, I can get back up and try again because there is no end to second chances.

I am so thankful for the chance I have each week to repent and try again. I am grateful for the opportunities I have to become aware of the changes that I need to make in my life. I am grateful for a God who loves me enough to kindly let me know that I am not doing as much as I should or could be, and that I need to make a change. I am grateful that He gives me so many opportunities and chances to start again.

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I am grateful for the blessings of the temple. I was thinking this week about my experience in the temple last Saturday, and how much love and peace I felt. I didn't go with a specific question or thought to ponder, and the questions that I thought about briefly in the temple didn't seem so important. I think that it was just important for me to recognize that feeling of love and peace, and that God is proud of me no matter what.

Sometimes I feel distanced from Him, but when I look back on these moments when I felt the Spirit, and when I felt the Lord's love, I am reminded that He is far nearer than I ever imagined. He is in every flower, every creature, every moment of love and happiness, and in every second chance.

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I was reading in Moroni 7 earlier this week and I was thinking about how important faith, hope, and charity are to our lives. Faith and hope lead to charity, and without charity–which is the pure love of Christ–I think that life is almost meaningless. The first great commandment is to love God, and the second is to love thy neighbor as thyself. LOVE is the first great commandment. I am so grateful that I have a heart that is always willing and open to loving and caring for those around me because I have learned a lot about God and myself as I have loved and cared for those around me. More than I would if I didn't have a heart that is so open to loving and serving those around me.

Hope you have a wonderful week!! God loves you, and I love you!

Xoxo
Mattie