He is there to help us at our most vulnerable points.

I find that even the craziest weeks go smoothly when I take the time to study my scriptures. I'm not perfect at always remembering to do so, but when I do remember, my days seem to go better. I'm less stressed, more alert, and more in tune with the Spirit. On days when I don't, I'm more stressed, more forgetful, and more anxious, which tends (at times) to drive the Spirit away. Not a lot, but enough that it throws my whole day off. I know I'm blessed when I take the time to study my scriptures. I'm blessed with more time–or, at least, time well-spent and managed–and with a more alert mind. I'm also blessed with the Spirit. So grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who blesses me with the capacity to see and understand when I am blessed because I obey Him.

Sacrament meeting was wonderful today! We had two beautiful musical numbers and two awesome talks.

Misfortune happens to us all the time. It doesn't depend on your personal worthiness or unworthiness; life just happens to everyone.

Reasons why we obey the commandments:
1. Simple Obedience
2. Habit
3. Fear of Punishment
-Affliction is not necessarily evidence that one has sinned (Job)
-Neither prosperity nor suffering can easily be interpreted
4. Desire for Blessings
-Promises to groups don't mean consistent prosperity for all the people in the group all the time
5. Out of love for the Lord
-Our nature and purpose on this earth is to have joy
-The joy we feel has little to do with our circumstances and everything to do with the focus of our lives.

In Gospel Principles, we talked about prayer. It was a very enlightening lesson and I learned a lot.
-God cares about us, so what we care about is also important to Him.
-You can't get an answer by praying, "Should I...?" because you're asking Him to take away your agency. You need to first make a decision, and ask, "How can I go about this decision?" And God will guide you.
-Heavenly Father accepts what we bring to the table. He wants to help us.
-If you do your best, God will do the rest.
-Look for what God wants, not what you want.
-He is there to help us at our most vulnerable points.
-It's okay to be honest and tell God how you feel, as long as you are humble enough to listen to what He has to say in response.

In our 5th Sunday lesson, Sister Harline said something that I loved. She said, "Be prayerful in your dating and ask for guidance." I forget that that is a thing that I can ask for help with. God cares about all the things that I do, and dating is included in that. :)

So thankful for the lessons today! I'm thankful for my Heavenly Father's guidance and the lessons that He teaches me that I need to know. He is there for us always, and He listens to us in our most vulnerable states–our most emotional times. He will always listen, but we have to make sure that we listen to Him in return.

Xoxo
Mattie

"The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay."

I'm not perfect.

Sometimes people get on my nerves and I get really annoyed. I know I shouldn't, but sometimes I do. I try not to let it show, but sometimes my temper gets the best of me, and my words come out biting, short, clipped. I wonder how it makes them feel. Does it bother them? Can they ever tell? Is it all in my head, and I just think it's obvious and sounds that way? I think sometimes they can tell. It makes me feel bad, using my words in a not-so-nice way. I know how it feels. I know how it hurts. But tempers are a fickle thing, and I'm only human. So I'm bound to make a mistake, have a misstep. All that really matters is that I repent and try again. And again. And again. Thankfully, my Savior is there to give me a hand. I couldn't do it without Him. Someday, I'll be perfect. But, for now, I'll just apologize and try again.


Church today was amazing!!

The choir sang today and it was so good!! I got a lot of compliments on the beauty of the piece, and how it brought the Spirit, and that made me feel really happy, because that is the point of my calling, and the point of the choir's musical numbers: to bring the Spirit. So when I get people thanking me, and telling me the choir sounded beautiful, it makes me happy. It makes me feel like I'm making a difference. :)

The topic in sacrament meeting today was conversion. There were a few things that were said that really stood out to me. Conversion takes time; it's a process. Being converted and having a testimony aren't necessarily the same thing. The Lord expects us to have faith, and we must do all we can to fortify ourselves spiritually.

In Sunday School, we talked about the pioneers. Someone said that a major part of understanding our trials is by being humble enough to ask God why we have these trials. Trials force us to be less complacent in life, and make a decision. Nate shared a quote that I loved, "The price we paid to become acquainted with God was a privilege to pay, and I am thankful that I was privileged to come in the Martin Handcart Company", and I feel like the beginning portion in italics can be applied to us. The price we pay to become acquainted with God is worth it, and is a privilege to pay. It's so amazing that He trusts us and loves us enough to let us become acquainted with Him!

Relief Society was awesome! My roommate shared a few questions that I loved and think can apply to life in a lot of different ways:
-Are you trying to do this by yourself?
-Do you need to?
-Will you let Him help you?
She said that we are yoked to Christ, and He goes one by one, step by step, and from grace to grace.

There is a mission for us. There's a mission for me. And a mission for you. We are all here for a purpose. God wants us to try and, He wants us to work hard. And He will be there for us, and He will bless us.

I'm so thankful that I have learned so much this past month, from General Conference, and stake conference, and ward conference. There has been a lot I've learned, and needed to hear, and needed reminders of. I'm needed here. I'm loved. I'm wanted. And I need to learn to love and accept myself. I'm working on it, and I think it's going really well.

I hope you have a wonderful Sabbath Day! I love you and wish you the best week!

Xoxo
Mattie

Hope cometh of faith.

Something I was thinking about today during the sacrament was that, "Life has its ups and downs, but God is there to lift me during the downs, and cheer during the ups. I am blessed beyond measure in my life right now. I am blessed, loved, and here for a purpose."

Today was our ward conference, and I am so thankful for all that was taught today! Our theme was Ether 12:4. Two main topics were "Always abounding in good works" and "Hope (for a better world)".

Bishop said something in sacrament meeting today that I loved. He said that as we believe in God, we can find hope for a better future. He said hope cometh of faith, and gave a list of things that we can do to have hope:
-Increase your faith
-Pray often
-Read the scriptures
-Be obedient
-Magnify your calling
-Be humble
-Go to the temple
These things will increase our faith and will lead to having an increase in hope.

President Acerson said that the greater the distance you are from the light, the more difficult it will be to see God's plan for you. He said the rules are there to initiate us on our journey back to our Father in Heaven.

Sister Acerson talked in second hour about glorifying God, and I said that one way to glorify God was to be ourselves, and love who we are. God made us the way He did because He loves us, and by accepting who we are, we are telling Him that we love Him, and that we are going to do all we can to please Him, and glorify. Colvin said, going off of that, that by becoming our best self, we are glorifying God. Other things that were said were, Always give Him credit; service; keep the Sabbath Day holy; and being grateful.

President Radmall said that hope is critical to both faith and charity. He said our hope is in our Redeemer, and His hope is in us.
Faith, hope, and charity work together. You cannot have one without the other two.

President Moon talked about good works. We talked about the miracles of Jesus, and how they apply to us, and a lot of people made some amazing connections:
-We are His priority. Even when He is on His way to do something already, He will stop for us. (Mark 5:22-34)
-Simple things that are important to us are important to Him. (John 2:1-10)
One thing that I wanted to talk about but didn't get the chance to say was that I love the story of raising Lazarus from the dead because Jesus wept with Mary and Martha. He loved Lazarus, and lost a dear friend, and He felt their pain. Jesus knows how we feel, so He will be there for us.

President Acerson then asked us what things we had learned, and there were some great things said about what people learned:
-Have faith that if we stop in the middle of a test to help someone, we will still get our task done.
-It's good to let go of guilt.
-We are a priority to God, so we need to act like it.
-We're better than we we think we are because we're His. Cling to Him.
-God knows us a lot better than we do. He knows what we can do.
I learned that I love deeply, but forget to love myself. I am working on it. :)

I am so grateful for our stake leaders! I love them so much! They always know just what to say, and I know that they love us so much!

I am so thankful for the opportunity I have to serve as the ward choir director! It is helping me learn and grow in ways I didn't think I ever could. We are performing next week and I am nervous but excited for how our number is going to go. I think it will be wonderful! I am so excited for Thanksgiving and Christmas already! I am still working on picking songs for them but I have a few ideas. :)

God loves you. He knows you. As you serve Him, He will bless you.

Xoxo
Mattie

I am learning.

First things first: I had the opportunity to go to the BYU Spectacular with some friends last night and it was AMAZING!!! Kristin Chenoweth is fantastic, and Gentri and Vocal Point were awesome! So thankful that I had the opportunity to see it with them, and I'm glad they had fun!!

Second: I missed posting last week because it was General Conference and I had a lot of stuff going on. But! I have a lot of things that I learned in this past week, and am still learning, that I wanted to share:

I am learning that I can do hard things.

I am learning that I am more capable than I realize.

I am learning that I am not alone.

I am learning that I am strong.

I am learning that I can be happy, even when I'm going through tough things.

I am learning that God loves me so much, He's saving me from a lot of pain.

I am learning that I am loved.

I am learning that patience is a virtue.

I am learning that emotions are sometimes REALLY HARD to deal with!

I am learning that I have the roommates that I need in my life right now.

I am learning that I can't always fix things.

I am learning that stress doesn't fix anything.

I am learning that you can't always see the other side.

I am learning that you can't let the past define you.

I am learning that you can't let the past get ahead of you and keep you from your future.

I am learning that God's plan for me isn't the same as mine, and that our timelines probably aren't even close to being similar, but I'm also learning that that's okay.

I am learning that peace comes from the Book of Mormon, especially when I'm stressed.

I am learning that life is hard, but I am so tough, and I have God on my side.

Some of these things I've already previously learned, but had forgotten. Some of them are new.  Either way, they're all still worth knowing and learning. It's been a crazy week, and I've had a lot going on, and I've been through a lot. I've had a lot of talks with my roommates, and I've learned way too many things about myself in one week than is probably healthy haha but it has been helpful. My roommate gave me a few goals to work on in the next couple of weeks, and I think that they will help me in one aspect specifically, but I've learned that generally they all blend together, so it will probably help me in more than one.

I am grateful for my roommates. They show so much strength in times of hardship and sorrow. I'm so grateful that they are all kind, loving, and have such wonderful testimonies. I am learning lots from them every single day, and I am so grateful for that.

Xoxo
Mattie