Thy will be done.

Yesterday was the five-year anniversary of the death of one of my dear friends. It never gets easier. I remember the day like it was yesterday. I was in high school, I was sad the whole day, and I have the greatest friends who just hugged me and let me cry. I had literally just gone to see her the previous Monday because it was Labor day and I just wanted to see her. I just spent 15 or 20 minutes with her, and I didn't really speak until the last few minutes as I told her a little about my life and then said "I love you" and "Goodbye" but oh, how I could feel her spirit, and the Spirit of the Lord!!

She was such an amazing example to me of Christlike love, and of a Christlike heart and spirit. Some days it doesn't seem real that she is gone, but she is. I am grateful for the time I had with her, and for the love she gave me, and for the happiness that she brought to the world, and to my life. She had the biggest heart and loved so much!! I still feel her every so often in life.

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This week is going to be a little crazy–I've got a lot going on–but I know that God blesses us as we put Him first, so this week I am going to do my best to put Him first, no matter what. It might be challenging, but challenges lead to growth, and that is what we are here for–to learn and grow. 

I am so blessed to be where I am right now. It might be a little stressful and overwhelming at times, but I know that God is with me and He knows who and what I need in my life. No one is perfect but they can be perfectly what I need. 

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"Thy will be done." This is a hard thing for me to accept sometimes, and I know that we all struggle with it at times. Today I was thinking during the sacrament about what kinds of things I can do to help me accept the Lord's will. One thing that I was thinking about was that as we recognize the Lord's hand in not only our life, but in the lives of those around us, we can come to see that He has a plan for each of us. He has a timeline for all of us that leads to our learning and growth. 

As we live our lives and move forward, making decisions and choices according to what we desire, and according to what the Lord would have us do, we can come to see that His will is greater than ours, and that we can come to know and understand some parts of His plan for us. This can help us to begin to try to accept those parts of His plan that we do not always understand. 

Sometimes I don't understand my path, or my weaknesses. I don't understand how they have helped me or will help me grow. And that's okay. It took me a long time to realize that. It's okay not to know why. As long as I know that my Savior is there for me, and that I am here on this Earth to help love His sheep–Heavenly Father's children–and that I am here to help increase the love in the world, I know that He will help me. As I study my scriptures, my patriarchal blessing, the talks of our Church leaders, and visit the temple, I know that the Lord will help me understand what He needs me to do. 

Life is challenging–sometimes it's more challenging than other times–but I know that God is always with me, and I know that He has a plan to help me learn and grow. 

I know that I am where I need to be right now, and I know that I am being stretched in many ways. I know that I am growing and I know that I am becoming someone who my Heavenly Father can be proud of. 

I hope you all have a great week! Know that I pray for you every day and you are always in my heart and in my thoughts! God loves you and I love you! 

Xoxo

Mattie