Thursday, May 7, 2020

Shining bright with hope.

It's been a few weeks since I've updated my blog. I'm sorry about that. Life has been crazy and hectic. Things have been changing almost every day and it's been stressing me out, and I needed to take a breather.

Over the last few weeks, I have had a lot going on. I have had the opportunity to move into my new apartment, where Ricky will be joining me on May 20th when we are married. I have had the stress of a new job, which keeps changing things almost every day, and it's very hard to keep track of sometimes. And I have still been finalizing weddings plans. We were kind of counting on being able to use the church's cultural hall, but that is no longer an option. Instead, we will be getting married in my parents' front yard, and we are trying to figure out how to do a Facebook live or Zoom call or something like that so that Ricky's parents can participate, as well as any other extended family and friends of ours that would like to participate.

Today, the Church released that they are opening some temples in Utah for live sealings of previously endowed members. Ricky and I fall into this category. While I would much like to wait until we can invite so many more of our family and friends, as the future is unknown and we don't know when that would be, we are going to try to be sealed as soon as possible. While I am unsure yet how many guests we can have, I am sure it will be no more than 20, as that is the state's current number for "groups".

I am not going to lie, I am kind of super disappointed and sad. This whole experience has just been STRESSFUL for me. I haven't been able to really enjoy my time being engaged. My wedding plans have been changing on the daily, and I don't even know what's happening anymore. The minute that some temples were announced as being reopened for previously endowed members of the Church to be sealed as husband and wife, EVERYONE I know was sending me the link to the article, and asking if that changed things. I am not going to lie–I cried on my lunch break today because I was so overwhelmed and stressed. I was just about ready to relax because everything was pretty much done for the wedding–we just needed to buy Ricky's tie, probably some wedding decorations, and get/make food for the wedding brunch–and then the temples reopened and added a new element for me to think on.

I am really trying not to stress about this, but it is just so much more emotionally and mentally taxing for me than I thought it would be. I am grateful that I have Ricky to lean on. He has been so amazing through everything. I am so lucky to be the one that he chooses everyday, and I am so grateful that I get to choose him every day. It's the best and easiest choice I've ever made in my entire life. He is the brightest spot in my life when things are dark. He is always shining bright, and I love that about him.

Photo Credit: Beyond The Darkroom Photography
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In Elder L. Whitney Clayton's General Conference talk in April 2013 "Marriage: Watch and Learn", he gives some great marriage advice that I loved.

"First, I have observed that in the happiest marriages both the husband and wife consider their relationship to be a pearl beyond price, a treasure of infinite worth. They both leave their fathers and mothers and set out together to build a marriage that will prosper for eternity. They understand that they walk a divinely ordained path. They know that no other relationship of any kind can bring as much joy, generate as much good, or produce as much personal refinement. Watch and learn: the best marriage partners regard their marriages as priceless.

Next, faith. Successful eternal marriages are built on the foundation of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and adherence to His teachings. I have observed that couples who have made their marriages priceless practice the patterns of faith: they attend sacrament and other meetings every week, hold family home evening, pray and study the scriptures together and as individuals, and pay an honest tithing. Their mutual quest is to be obedient and good. They do not consider the commandments to be a buffet from which they can pick and choose only the most appealing offerings.

Faith is the foundation of every virtue that strengthens marriage. Strengthening faith strengthens marriage. Faith grows as we keep the commandments, and so do the harmony and joy in marriage. Thus, keeping the commandments is fundamental to establishing strong eternal marriages. Watch and learn: faith in the Lord Jesus Christ is the foundation of happy eternal marriages.

Third, repentance. I have learned that happy marriages rely on the gift of repentance. It is an essential element in every good marital relationship. Spouses who regularly conduct honest self-examination and promptly take needed steps to repent and improve experience a healing balm in their marriages. Repentance helps restore and maintain harmony and peace.

Humility is the essence of repentance. Humility is selfless, not selfish. It doesn’t demand its own way or speak with moral superiority. Instead, humility answers softly and listens kindly for understanding, not vindication. Humility recognizes that no one can change someone else, but with faith, effort, and the help of God, we can undergo our own mighty change of heart. Experiencing the mighty change of heart causes us to treat others, especially our spouses, with meekness. Humility means that both husbands and wives seek to bless, help, and lift each other, putting the other first in every decision. Watch and learn: repentance and humility build happy marriages.

Fourth, respect. I have observed that in wonderful, happy marriages, husbands and wives treat each other as equal partners. Practices from any place or any time in which husbands have dominated wives or treated them in any way as second-class partners in marriage are not in keeping with divine law and should be replaced by correct principles and patterns of behavior."

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I am so excited to be Ricky's partner and equal in life. I am so excited to go shopping every other weekend with him. I am so excited to discuss dinner options for the week. I am so excited to wake up next to him every morning. I am so excited to be able to study our scriptures and pray together in our own home. I am so excited to be able to create our life and family together. I am so excited to be able to grow closer together and grow closer to God together. I am so excited to be able to move forward in life with him by my side. Together, I know that we will be able to make our way through this crazy adventure called life together. 

I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who has blessed me in so many ways. I am so grateful for the examples that I have to look up to in my life of great marriages. I am grateful for the wonderful friends and family who have been so supportive and loving. Even though things keep changing on me, and it is stressful, I am learning to work through them. I am learning to take things one thing at a time. Some days, I don't always remember that. But each day is something new. Each day is different. Each day is a blessing. And I know that I am never alone.

Xoxo
Mattie

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