A New Year means a new Me.

Hi! I had a busy day today. I was watching my friend's little boy (he's SO adorable! ❤️) for several hours. He's sooo cute and I just LOVE watching him play and have fun!! :) [Side note that I could probably leave out and is on my "Mattie Don't Do That" list but I'm Me so I won't leave it out and I will do it: If I could somehow split myself into multiple Mattie's, thus enabling me to watch him whenever she needs (as well as allowing me do what I need to do) I totally would]
I can't wait till the day when I get to watch my own little babies play and have fun, but for now, I will have to live with watching other people's–which is fine by me. More exposure to lots of kids who are just so cute! :)

It's almost a new year! New year, new me, new experiences, and new goals. It's all so exciting!! Buuuuuuut also terrifying. I'm not going to lie–I'm kind of terrified. I have a different work schedule this upcoming semester–the lunch shift Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. SO my afternoons/evenings are cleared up because my last classes on Mondays/Wednesdays/Fridays end at 3! So I'm super grateful for that. But this job pays less than my custodial job that I had the first half of the semester. And I have slightly fewer hours, as well. So it's a giant cut in my pay and I'm a little worried about that. Also, I'm not sure if I'll be doing spring semester or not–I still have to talk to my parents about that.

ANYWAY, this new year brings on New Year's Resolutions! The fun to-do/work on list that practically everyone quits following after a month or two. ;) I'm going to try really, really, really hard this year, though. My New Year's Resolutions are as follows:

1. To have consistent and meaningful scripture study and prayer. I am really bad at this–I will either get one or the other. This year I want to try and get both. It will be easier this year, I think, for this semester I am not working early in the morning or till 10 at night. But we will see. 
2. To be patient–with myself and others. I usually am more patient with others than I am with myself, but sometimes I get a little frustrated with others (though I try not to let it show because it's not their fault, and they're not doing anything wrong, it's just me being me). So I'm going to try and be better about that this year. Especially with myself, too. I am still, uh, healing, I guess, from something that impacted me greatly a couple of years ago and I just need to be patient with myself and work on it one day at a time.
3. To have kind words, thoughts, and actions. This one has become a bigger part of my life in more recent years as I've grown up. I am trying so hard to be a good person but it's getting a little bit harder as I am becoming more exposed to the world. 
4. To keep up/be ahead with my homework. This will be a little difficult, but hopefully less difficult, since my work schedule is on my days off, and my evenings are going to be cleared up. 
5. To manage my time well. I am bad at this. I either guess how much time something will take me to do wrong, or I put it off more than I should have, or both, or something else equally as bad. Anyway, I am going to try to be better about this.
6. To not be afraid to do something fun and/or spontaneous. This one I have trouble with sometimes. I worry about how much time it will take, or if I should have done that (that being any number of things from "Should I have sent that text?" to "Oh my gosh, I should not have waited so long to do this *fun thing* or *this thing I have to do sometime*"). Anyway, I worry about the time, or if I should have done that, or whatever, when I should just relish and bask in the fun-ness and the spontaneity of whatever I am/will be doing. 
7. To be more friendly. Sometimes I'm super friendly, but sometimes I get really shy or intimidated because that's just who I am. I have been getting a lot better (especially since I started college) but I have also been thinking and worrying a lot more (also especially since I started college) which needs to stop! So, cue number 8.
8. To not think or worry so much. This one is going to be the most difficult, I think, because it is just in my nature. I can't help it. I overthink everything and I stress about a lot of things that I don't/can't always control. Sometimes it's good, but a lot of the time it just makes me more stressed and worried. So I am going to try to keep it down. I'm never going to stop thinking or worrying, but I can definitely try to do it less often/intensely.
9. To a) be more Christlike; and b) turn to my Savior more often. As in daily. I need to remember that He is there for me whenever I need Him and that He will help me through anything and everything that I need to do. He will always be there for me, and I do not have to do anything alone.

As you can see, I have quite a list, which is a little intimidating, but also exciting! Usually I only have one or two things. This year, I have NINE! (Ten if you count 9 as two things, but eh) That's a little scary but I know that I can do it! As I focus on turning to my Savior, and being more like Him, I know that everything else will fall into place. I'm super excited for this new year–it's going to be way different, but also kind of the same. Here's to a new year, new goals, new experiences, new classes, new friends, new relationships, and a new me. :)

P.S. This is entirely irrelevant but I still haven't been on a(n official) date yet since I started college, and you know what? I've decided that I am completely okay with that and I'm not going to worry about it. It'll happen when it'll happen. And besides, I'm still trying to figure out exactly who I am–which is kind of being troublesome. Throw dating into that mix and I will be a completely chaotic and insanely mad mess. ;)