Progress, not perfection.

It's been a beautiful week coming back to camp! I was well-rested from my time at home and I had a lot of energy the first couple of days. It has mellowed out now and I can control it more, but it's still there.

This week I've been trying to be more Christlike. I've been trying to be nicer, more thoughtful, and more focused on my tasks that I have to do–there's more but those are the top three. I'm not perfect at them, but I'm proud of my progress so far. 

Pat–our camp chaplain–shares a quote each day at breakfast. The quote the other day was: "God doesn't expect perfection but He does expect progress." For some reason that really resonated with me. Maybe because of all the failures I've had with overcoming and fixing different parts of me. Or maybe not, I don't know. What I do know is this: I'm trying to be better each day than I was the day before, each day I've made some progress, and ANY amount of progress is okay! As long as you are working to make an effort, God is proud of you. 

There's a spot in camp that I like to go on Saturdays because it's really peaceful and quiet, and out of the way of other people. I go there to sit, think, and ponder. I go there when I'm in need of a break, or when I am just in need of time for me without other people. Since I'm alone, I talk to Heavenly Father out loud. It gets really emotional really fast, but it's really helpful for me to talk to Him about all of the things I'm going through because He completely understands. And the great thing is that even when I'm completely indecipherable or inconsolable, the peace of the water around me, the sounds of the birds–they all help bring me back to earth. 

I've learned a lot this summer. And I'm sure I still have more to learn. But I've learned that even when I don't feel Him, relying on my Heavenly Father keeps me grounded. I've learned that He's always blessing me–even when I don't always hear Him. I've learned that even when I feel like I don't make a difference, and when I feel unnoticed, I am making a difference–somehow, to someone, I am making a difference. It's true that I might not always be noticed, but more often than not I am noticed, and I am missed. 

I don't know what kind of impact I'm going to have on the world. Or even if I will have an impact on the world. But I do know this: the world is going to have an impact on me. And I can't wait to find it, and feel it. 

I hope you have a beautiful week!! I hope you find someone who needs your help and love, and I hope you find something new and special about yourself. 

Xoxo

Mattie

It's okay to be imperfect.

It's okay not to be perfect. In fact, it's okay to be IMperfect. Our Heavenly Father loves us as we are right now. Imperfections and all. But He also wants us to improve ourselves. We all have weaknesses. Some of them we can't fix by ourselves. We need His help. He has given us all the tools we need to be able to improve ourselves and work to be better people. One of the things that He has given us is His Son, Jesus Christ–our Savior. Our Savior knows what we are going through. He knows what we have gone through. He knows how to help us get through our trials. 

According to the Topical Guide, weakness is "the condition of being mortal and lacking ability, strength, or skill. Weakness is a state of being. All people are weak, and it is only by God's grace that they receive power to do righteous acts." In Ether 12:27, we are told that God gives us weakness to become humble, and if we humble ourselves and have faith, He will take our weaknesses and make them strengths. If we take our weaknesses to Him, and tell Him that we need help overcoming it, He will help us. He will help us make it into a strength. It might not always be what we were expecting, but it will be what we need, and sometimes it will be what others need from us. 

You might be asking, "How does this work? How does He use our weaknesses and turn them into strengths?" Well, I found an article that helps discuss just that! You can find it here, and I will share a few quotes and things from it for those of you who don't want to read it. ;)

"At first blush, it seems counterintuitive that the Lord would call upon the weak things of the earth to accomplish a mighty work. To appreciate why the Lord calls the weak, remember that the Lord says his work must be accomplished in His own way and by the power of His Spirit: His ways, in other words, not our ways. Those who perceive themselves to be “strong” do not turn wholeheartedly to the Lord for guidance. Instead, they rely on their own wisdom and their own understanding, “the arm of the flesh.” As a consequence, they are left to their own strength; and they will find in the end—to their dismay—that their strength is insufficient."

I love this! Sometimes I think the Lord uses our weaknesses, and other weak things, in order to prove that He is God–to prove that He can do all things. In Judges, God takes Gideon's army and downsizes it from 32,000 men to 300–and they won against an army of 135,000!! If that doesn't show the power and strength of obeying God, and the power and strength of something that appears weak but God has made strong, I don't know what does.

In the Book of Mormon, when the Nephites go to war against the Lamanites with the strength of the Lord, they always prevail. When they boast of their strengths, and forget the Lord, they fail.

There is a difference between humbly accepting your weaknesses...and just plain old tearing yourself down because you think you're not enough or you've just done things wrong. Stop tearing yourself down! I, too, am guilty of this, I am not going to lie. I have a problem with it. That is one of my weaknesses (and personally, I think it is one that everyone struggles with but I am not going to judge). When you get on your knees, and tell the Lord, honestly, and full of hope and faith, "I struggle with this. Will you help me?" He will help you. He loves when we turn to Him because that means that we are being humble! Knowing that we cannot do things on our own, and turning to Him for help is being humble! It's accepting that you can't do it by yourself, and you need the Lord's help.

God has a work for us to do...and He uses us in our weakness to strengthen those around us.

I have a new goal for myself. I am trying to focus on being worthy to go through the temple. I'm not sure when I will be ready to go through, but I am wanting to at least be worthy to go through for awhile before I actually go through. I have been thinking about it for awhile, but haven't really focused on it yet, and now I want to focus on it. I think that one thing that has been stressing me out about the future is that the only 'goal' I have so far to look forward to is one that I don't really have opportunities for right now. So, if I have this goal to work on, I have something to look forward to. I have something to work towards.

I'm going back to Bear Lake today! I'm so excited! I've had a great week spending time with my family. It's been good to relax, and I'm excited to go back to work! The rest of the summer is going to be so fun!!

I hope you have a wonderful week!! And I hope that you know that God loves you so much and He wants what's best for you!!

Xoxo
Mattie

Life is meant for learning who you are.

This week I'm home for the Fourth of July!! I am so excited!! I'm grateful to have an opportunity to rest and relax, and spend time with my family! And I was able to see a bunch of friends from my ward at Cinnamon Tree this weekend and it was SO good to see them!! I really miss them!!

I'm so thankful for the opportunity I have to be working at Bear Lake this summer! It has been a real blast so far!! Difficult, yes. Trying, yes. But...it's super fun–the other staffers are great, and we have a lot of amazing times together. :)

I am so thankful for my Savior, and all that He has done for me. Since I've been at camp, some of my struggles have gone down a lot. They're still there, of course, but since I'm busy every day (and tired every day lol), and I've got a lot of things to do when I'm not working (reading, listening to music, writing, eating, watching movies or shows, talking with my friends up at camp, etc.), I am able to march through, and I'm able to stay strong.

I love the peace that I find at Bear Lake, and I love the spirit that I feel–there's an amazing feeling that I just can't describe. Reading the scriptures in the morning while the sun rises has been such a wonderful experience. There are several answers that I am hoping to receive this summer, and I am so thankful that I get to be out in nature, feeling peace, and the Spirit, and trying to figure things out–who I am, where I'm going, what I want to do with my life, why I am where I am when I am.

Humans desire and crave connections with other people. But we also crave a more spiritual connection–with the world, with God–with whatever you believe in. I am so thankful to be able to have the opportunity to spend time in nature this summer, and to feel my testimony grow, and to become more comfortable in who I am. That's what life is about, right? Learning to find and be comfortable with yourself.

I'm looking forward to the rest of this week, and I'm looking forward to the rest of the summer. I've already learned a lot about myself and I am excited to see what else I am going to be learning about myself, and about life in general.

An awesome God, wonderful adventures, fantastic family, and loving friends are all beautiful additions to–nay, are the reason for this amazing life that I call mine. I hope you all have a wonderful week!! <3

Xoxo
Mattie

Whatever He promises to you will happen in time.

You only get one life. You only get once chance to live. Are you going to waste it waiting for opportunities? Or are you going to make your own opportunities? Are you going to take chances, make mistakes, get messy? Are you going to try out for the job or audition for the part? Or are you going to wait for them to come to you? Are you going to take charge of your own life? Or are you going to let your life take charge of you?

I've been thinking a lot this week about the future. Mainly because I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. But also because the whole idea of the future is odd, because it's equal parts intriguing and terrifying. It's intriguing because there are so many possibilities. It's terrifying because there are so many possibilities and I don't know which ones are going to happen, or when. However, as I was reading in 1 Nephi 3 this week, verses 7 and 16 stood out to me. 

Verse 7 is the one in which Nephi states that he knows "the Lord giveth no commandment unto to the children of men, save he shall prepare a way for them that they may accomplish the thing which he commandeth them." I love this scripture because it's a reminder to me that whatever God has commanded me to do, He will prepare the way. And whatever He has promised me...will come in time. 

Verse 16 says, "let us be faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord". As we keep His commandments, He will bless us. And previously kept commandments make way for other commandments to be kept, and for other blessings to be given to us. 

Heavenly Father knows us. He really does. He loves us so much. He knows what we want. He knows what hurts us. He knows what makes us happy. He knows what helps us through our difficult times. He knows the best things for us. He wants what is best for us, but He also knows and realizes that we have our agency. So He doesn't make us do anything we don't want to do—He won't make us do anything we don't want to do. 

God blesses us and works in mysterious ways. It's hard not to jump ahead in the story sometimes, but we have to let it play out. Because sometimes it's not meant to go the way we want it to go. Sometimes it's meant to go in a different direction to help us get to the right storyline, the right path, and heading in the right direction. There's a lot that we don't know, and there's a lot that we can't control. So we just have to accept that. It's hard sometimes, but once you come to that understanding, and you are ready to move forward in your life with faith...then everything just starts to make sense, and fall into place. And sometimes you'll get a roller coaster of "Yes, this makes sense", "Um, what just happened?" "Oh, I see now", etc. And that's okay. Life isn't easy. It's not all puppies and rainbows. Sometimes there are thorns. 

One thing that I want is I want God to let me know that He understands me–that He knows what I'm going through, and He knows how I feel. I know that He does, but sometimes I just don't feel it. And I have been hoping and praying this week to feel it. And there were a couple instances, looking back, that I know He answered my prayer. I hope that I can see more answers in the upcoming weeks. 

I love my Heavenly Father so much. I am so thankful for all that He does for me. I'm so thankful for the opportunity to work at Bear Lake this summer. I know that there are things here I have to learn, or experience, and I know that I am going to grow this summer. I know that all of my coworkers are meant to be in my life right now. I'm so glad to call them my friends and I hope that we will have many more amazing adventures this summer. 

God loves you very much, and He is watching out for you every day. He knows what you are going through and He will help you through it if you ask Him.

I found this quote: "The struggle you're in today is developing the strength you need for tomorrow."  I really liked that. Everything we go through is helping prepare us for tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Let it boost you up, and strengthen you. You'll be able to do many amazing things. I promise. 

I hope you have a great week!! I'm so excited! This next weekend I get to go home for the Fourth of July!! I'm so excited!! It'll be nice to be home for a couple of days! 

Xoxo

Mattie

Daily scripture study changes lives.

Man, what a week!! We had our first group of scouts, and it was crazy! But we did it!! We had a lot of challenges, as is expected with teen boys, but we learned and grew as a staff. Next week will bring more challenges and lessons but it will be worth it!

I have really been blessed this week as I've studied my scriptures each night. I'm able to get more out of my experiences here at camp, and I am able to be more in tune with the Spirit, as well as be more determined and capable of working hard. This week I've been reading in First Nephi Chapters 1 and 2. There are a couple of things that stood out to me that I thought were profound and wanted to share. 

One thing I noticed was that in chapter one, Nephi makes a statement that he is first going to be making an abridgement of his father's record, and then he will make his record. How awesome is that? Nephi was doing family history before it was cool. I recently finished a book series by Richard Paul Evans, entitled The Walk. And there is a part in one of the books where the main character's father writes the history of his family at least three generations back. And I just thought, "how cool is that?" Family history is becoming a worldwide thing. And Nephi did it before it was cool. 

In chapter two, Nephi says that the Lord "did soften my heart that I did believe all the words which had been spoken by my father". Which means that Nephi, at one point, did not fully believe. However, unlike Laman and Lemuel, he did not harden his heart, so he was able to be converted, and believe his father's words.

I know that daily scripture study changes lives. I've seen the impact that it has on not only my life, but my friends' lives. I've seen the wonderful changes in them that it has had. I'm grateful to have so many wonderful examples of how important daily scripture study is. And I'm grateful to be blessed with so many amazing people to love and look up to. I know they love me, too, even when we're miles and miles apart.

I'm really grateful for the scriptures. I'm grateful for Joseph Smith's sacrifices to translate the Book of Mormon. I'm grateful for Mormon, and his dedication to abridging the book and making sure everything we would need is in there. I'm grateful for the pieces of truth that they hold, and for the ones that I've learned this week as I've studied them. I'm grateful for the light that they bring to my life. I'm grateful for the beauty of Bear Lake, and for my wonderful co-workers. I'm blessed each and every day by their examples, humor, service, and love. It's been a hard week but we've gotten through it together, and we all build each other up as often as we can. It's been an amazing experience and I can't believe we're going to be on week three this week!!

I'm grateful for my Father in Heaven, and for the love that He shows me each and every day. I'm grateful for the beauty of the world around me, and for the chance I have this summer to be surrounded. I'm grateful for my Savior, and for His sacrifice and love. Since it's Father's Day, I can't forget my own dad. I love him so much! I'm grateful for all that he does for me. I'm grateful for all the father figures in my life—my uncles, grandpas, and the other men in my life that I look up to. You are all wonderful examples of what real men are supposed to be like. Thank you for showing me how a man is supposed to treat the women in his life. Thank you for being willing to serve. And thank you for being willing to be soft and emotional, even when the world tells you you need to be tough and stoic.

I hope everyone is having a great summer!! Don't forget to wear sunscreen and drink water!! And remember who you are, and whose you are. God loves you very much and has many blessings in store for you. Be patient and remember that everything will work out in the end. Love you!! 💜

Xoxo
Mattie

That's all we can do.

Well my first week at camp is over!!! Man has it been a CRAZY week!! There's been a lot of things happening, but it's been really fun overall! I'm so tired and sore but I'm sure that it will get better in the upcoming week(s) as I get used to all the physical activity that my body is going through. 

There are a lot of things that I learned this week already! Here's a few of them:

1) It's difficult to cook for a ton of teenage boys!! They really like to eat!

2) All boys have the same sense of humor. They think they're so funny but after the first few times, my response is just a groan of annoyance. 

3) Every little thing will be all right. Somehow you'll make it through the day. 

4) Sometimes you have to take a day because you're not feeling well, and that's okay. It's better to rest and build up your strength than to run yourself weary. 

I decided to start reading the Book of Mormon from the very top this week. And I wanted to include the introduction, the testimonies, and the brief explanation of the Book of Mormon. And I discovered something I'd never noticed before. In the brief introduction, it states that, "The original title page, immediately preceding the contents pages, is taken from the plates and is part of the sacred text. Introductions in a non-italic typeface, such as in 1 Nephi...are also part of the sacred text." I had always known that the chapter headings were an addition to the book to let the reader know what's going on. I had little to no idea (AKA either absolutely no idea, or I hadn't consciously made the connection) that the title page and non-italic headings were actually part of the gold plates. I think that's so cool.

I was reading in Joseph Smith's testimony the other day and one thing that I noticed that I have never noticed before was the fact that Joseph actually saw Moroni go up into heaven! I think that that's so amazing! One thing that I really admire about Joseph is just how much he tried to obey God, and how hard he tried to learn from his mistakes. He wasn't perfect, but he really tried to do his best. And that's all that we can do. 

Don't give up. Just because you've made a miatake—big or small—doesn't mean that it's the end of the world. It's just a stumbling block...a learning curve/experience that will help you become a better person. Pick yourself up—or ask for someone to help you up—and try again. Because that's all we can do. Try again. We're not perfect, and we're going to make mistakes. Sometimes we'll make the same mistakes over and over again. Just remember: You are loved. God wants you to prevail. He loves you and trusts you, and wants you to come home to Him. And He is going to do all He can to make sure that you can come home if you want to. 

I hope you all have a wonderful week! Summer is always a great opportunity to try something new and to have a lot of fun! I'm grateful for the experiences that I've already had this week and I'm looking forward to having many more this summer! I hope you guys do something fun this week!! :)

Xoxo

Mattie

He can't answer us if we don't listen.

So, for the rest of the summer, until I'm back home from Bear Lake, my blog schedule and posting will be slightly different. I don't have wifi at camp, but we go to Garden City on Sunday for sacrament meeting, where there is wifi. I'm going to work on my blog posts on Saturday now, and post them on Sunday right after church, instead of working on them Sunday afternoons. I will still try to incorporate things I've learned in previous Sunday lessons, but mainly it will probably be a lot of just personal thoughts that I've had during the week as I've studied my scriptures and hung out with the scouts and staff. I don't entirely know, though, so we'll see what happens. :)

This week was CRAZY!! Not only was I still packing to prep for camp (which I left for on Friday), but it was the last week of school for my siblings, I volunteered to help at my brothers' school for field day, and my brother graduated from high school!! It was a fun week though! Lots of family time. :)

Today, I want to talk about understanding and recognizing the Spirit. In my Book of Mormon, I have a little note that I wrote awhile back. It says, "Have faith and try again". When I wrote it, I think I intended for it to be about my goal to be reading the scriptures and praying daily. While I still will apply it to that, it can be applied to almost anything. Are you struggling to be kind to someone who is always mean to you? Have faith and try again. Are you struggling to understand how to be patient? Have faith and try again. Anything you are struggling with–have faith and try again. With God, you can do anything you put your mind to.

As I was studying my scriptures last night, I wrote a few notes and wanted to share a couple of them. 

I was reading in Moroni 10:32, which says, "Yea, come into Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God." And I was thinking to myself, Heavenly Father wants me to succeed. He wants all of us to succeed. He has given us all specifically what we need to succeed. But we have to go to Him. We have to do our part. He can't help us if we don't listen. 

Again, Moroni 10, but verses 4-5, which says, "And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the truth of all things." And I thought to myself, You need faith and an open mind to be able to hear the Spirit and receive revelation and answers.

He can't answer us if we don't listen. And He can't answer us if we don't have faith. Having faith requires letting go of what you want and believe, and trusting that Heavenly Father will give us an answer. Sometimes it won't be the answer we wanted, but it will be the answer we need to succeed. Because that's all He wants for us. He wants us to succeed, and return to live with Him again. 

I hope you all have a wonderful week! It's June! And summertime! And time-for-adventure time! Remember to be safe, and wear sunscreen when you're going outside. And remember that God loves you, and that I love you. Life is better when you have friends that you love and live for. 💜

Xoxo

Mattie